Abnegation Hellions
by divergentpanda46
Summary: Beatrice Prior, her brothers Ezekiel and Uriah, and their friend Tobias have never fit into their faction of birth, Abnegation. When it comes time for Ezekiel and Tobias's choosing ceremony, they have a plan: they will transfer, and a year later, Beatrice and Uriah will follow. But Beatrice has a secret that could change everything. TEMPORARILY ON HIATUS
1. Chapter 1

_Hello! I published some of this story several years ago on an alternate account that I have since deleted. I had decided I wasn't so sure I liked it. But I have written a bit more since then and I might as well share it with you all again. Some other story on the site inspired the premise for this but it had been abandoned after a couple of chapters and I can't remember what it was called._

_I'll publish what I have already written pretty quickly... a couple chapters a week probably, as I complete editing on them. Updates will probably be slow once I get through what is already written; **Count On Me **is still my main focus and will be until it is completed. I know updates are slow enough on that as it is. Real life has been hitting me pretty hard. Without going into all the gritty personal details, we've had some pretty serious crises going on. But I will continue writing when I have the time, energy and inspiration._

**_**Please note- I have changed around their ages a bit. Tris and Uriah are 15 while Caleb, Zeke and Four are 16.**_**

_Anyway... here it is. I hope you like the story!_

* * *

**ABNEGATION HELLIONS**

**CHAPTER ONE**

_**Uriah POV (age 15)**_

I follow my sister swiftly down the old oak tree outside our bedroom window. Just moments ago, she clambered through the window much earlier than I expected her back, ordering me in a harsh whisper to put on my shoes and come help her.

"Help with what?" I asked her as I slipped on my worn gray sneakers.

Beatrice was already climbing back out the window. "Tobias," was all she answered.

I hang off the bottom branch, my feet just a yard off the ground, and let myself fall, bending my knees a bit to ease the impact. Beatrice motions frantically for me to follow her. What happened to Tobias? Did he get jumped in the Factionless sector? Fall from something, I wonder? I follow as Beatrice walks, darting between shadows to stay hidden from view, in the direction of Tobias's house. This surprises me, since that's the last place I would expect to need to sneak around like this to help Beatrice's secret boyfriend, because what could be wrong with him in his own home that he couldn't ask his father for help with?

"Tris!" I hiss, chasing after her as she darts around the side of the Eatons' house. It is a box-shaped, gray concrete dwelling identical to every other home in Abnegation, including our own, except that ours has three bedrooms instead of two, so this house is slightly smaller than ours.

Beatrice doesn't answer me; she just begins climbing. My jaw drops as she scales the side of the building as if she has done it a thousand times before. I suppose she probably has. Outside our own bedroom we use a tree, but there is no tree here. It takes a moment for me to see that footholds have been chipped away at random intervals up the side of the house. The window above us must be Tobias's. I carefully follow her up, though I have barely made progress when she disappears into the open bedroom window, because I have to search out the unfamiliar foot and hand holds in little light.

Beatrice is sitting on top of the gray blanket on Tobias's neatly made twin bed when I finally make it through the window. As Tobias is the only child in his family, he has a room of his own. There are four children in my family, so my "twin" sister and I share one room, and our older brothers, Ezekiel and Caleb, share the other. The third bedroom, of course, is our parents'. I wonder what it would be like to have a space all to myself like this. I suppose it wouldn't make that much difference; we don't really have things of our own, and we aren't supposed to spend time thinking of ourselves. To think of oneself; that time is better spent thinking about ways to help others.

I look around the room and see that Tobias isn't here. "Well?" I whisper. "I thought he needed help? Where is he?" Beatrice puts a finger to her lips and gives me a stern look. I roll my eyes; I know how to be quiet. If she has so little faith in me, she should have brought Ezekiel or Caleb, instead.

Beatrice tiptoes into the hallway and pulls a pin out of her hair before kneeling in front of the door to the small hall closet and working the lock with the pin. My eyes widen when not even thirty seconds later, it springs open. How does Beatrice know how to do that? To watch her, you'd think she did this all the time.

Maybe she does.

Beatrice is my twin sister, and we're close. I didn't think we had any secrets. I'm a little hurt now, realizing that trust must be one-sided. What else hasn't she trusted me enough to share?

All those thoughts are set aside when I see what is inside the closet.

I stare in horror at the figure folded into the fetal position on the closet floor. His short dark hair, long gangly limbs, ears that stick out just a little too much, and olive skin… I know that he is Tobias. But I can't seem to connect the image of this boy I grew up with, my brother Ezekiel's closest friend, my twin sister's secret boyfriend (at least that's one secret she did trust me with)... with the bloody, crumpled, unconscious figure sitting in front of me.

"He's totally out. I can't do this alone, not with him unconscious. It's never been this bad before." Before?! "Help me move him to the bed," she whispers. "You get his arms, I'll take his legs."

Numbly, as if on autopilot, I nod and maneuver my way into the closet far enough that I can grab under his arms, and I half lift, half drag him into the hall. Beatrice picks up his legs. In the little bit of moonlight shining into the hall, I see the tears glistening in her eyes. It is hard for _me_ to see my friend like this, but I know it's even harder for my sister to see the boy she loves in this condition. I feel like I should be able to piece together what is going on here, but it's as though nothing in the world makes sense any more, and I can't seem to impart any logic to this situation.

I start to put Tobias on his back, since that is the way we've been carrying him, but Beatrice stops me. "Uriah!" she hisses, then glances over her shoulder like she's afraid someone will pop out of the shadows if she is too loud. "His back is hurt. We have to lay him on his stomach."

With all the thoughts buzzing around my brain, I didn't even think of that. Beatrice won't call me stupid out loud, but I can see on her face that she's thinking it.

Once we have got him on the bed I have to help Beatrice strip his shirt off. It's becoming very clear that she's helped him with similar situations before… many times. She doesn't react at all to seeing him half-naked, not that there's anything at all… sexual… about this situation. But I can't help but wonder if she has seen his naked chest _outside_ of a medical situation like this. Tris gets too embarrassed to go into any sort of detail about what she and Tobias do, though I have caught them kissing before. Here in Abnegation, they shouldn't even be holding hands, not even in private. Actually, they shouldn't ever be near each other in private in the first place.

But I guess Beatrice just doesn't fit into Abnegation any better than I do.

Beatrice quickly and expertly cleans and wraps the large, long cuts and welts on Tobias's back. It seems pretty clear what happened, but it doesn't make sense. Tobias's father is Marcus Eaton, the leader of Abnegation and head of the city council. He is the highest member of government, and he was chosen for that position because of his selflessness and good moral character. So, how can it be possible that Marcus Eaton would beat his son?

I think this is going to be a long night. I think Beatrice has a whole lot to explain to me.

* * *

Beatrice runs ahead of me and jumps into the train car first, and I follow quickly after, knocking her over in the process. "Oops, sorry sis," I chuckle.

"Yeah, not having a guy twice my size land on me would be preferable." I chuckle but stop abruptly when I see the tears shining in her eyes. "You really should be more careful." She turns away and steps to the back wall of the car, sliding down the wall until she's sitting on the floor. The tears are running down her cheeks.

"Tris?" My voice comes out sounding like a child's, using the name I called her when I was a toddler. I took longer to speak well than Beatrice, and for a long time, Ezekiel, Caleb and Beatrice were Zee, Cale and Tris. Beatrice chokes out a sob as she looks down and shakes her head. I sit next to her, hip to hip, and wrap an arm around her narrow shoulders. "What's going on? Is this about what happened to Tobias, or is there something else? I feel like you're keeping a lot of secrets from me, Tris."

Beatrice sucks in a deep, shaky breath. "He has to leave, Uriah. He can't stay here."

"I know." After what I saw tonight, I know why. "But you knew he would be leaving, Beatrice. So are you and me, next year. This is what we've been training for the whole last two years."

"I know that," she sighs. "It- I can't- I don't think I can do this alone, Uriah! But if I tell him the truth, he'll stay! He can't. He just can't. We will never be safe."

"Tris, what are you…" I trail off when I see the way her hands are pressed low on her stomach and all the pieces come together. There's a lot she hasn't told me, alright. "Beatrice," I hiss, "are you pregnant?!"

"I think so," she whispers, tears streaming down her face. "I- I think I'm… several weeks… late."

"You can't seriously be considering letting Tobias leave without saying anything!" I explode. "He deserves to know, Beatrice. Caleb and Ezekiel should know before they leave as well. Just think how mad Ezekiel will be when you show up next year with a baby!"

"He can't stay!" she screams back. Her face is red and the tears on her cheeks shine in the moonlight. I wrap my arms around my sister and she sobs into my shirt. I know she is right… he wouldn't leave her alone with this. And then not only would he be stuck here for the rest of the life, but Beatrice and the kid would be, too. I know Beatrice would never leave him after he stayed here for her. And who knows what Marcus would do if he found out Tobias got a girl pregnant. I don't want to imagine it.

"Okay," I murmur in her ear as I smooth back the hair that has come loose from her Abnegation bun. "Okay, okay, you're right. He can't know." I release her and step back. "You need to tell him on Visiting Day, though, okay? And please, stop keeping so many secrets from me. You know you can trust me, Beatrice."

"Deal," she concedes. "But no telling Ezekiel or Caleb, or Mom and Dad either. Not before Tobias knows. Pinky promise?" She holds out her pinky finger, bent a little like a fishhook.

"Pinky promise." I link my pinky finger into hers and we shake once.

"As for secrets…" she sighs. "I just wasn't comfortable talking to my _brother_ about… how far Tobias and I had gone. And his secrets… are his secrets to tell, not mine. Please don't tell him you know. I don't think he has any idea you were there tonight, we should keep it that way."

I frown, but I can see that this is important to Beatrice. "Okay, I won't say anything."

* * *

_**Tobias POV (age 16)**_

I'm laughing so hard that I've got a stitch in my side as Uriah finishes his impression of Mrs. Egland, his faction history teacher. Ezekiel, Caleb and I all had her for faction history last year. "Yeah, yeah, you laugh now… _Tobias._" Damn it. I'm sure Uriah knows more about Beatrice and me than he should, and there's something off about him the last few days. If he is mad at me about something, I can only hope that he doesn't make me reveal anything about my relationship with Beatrice. Her other brothers don't know, and we already decided together to wait until after her initiation to tell them. I don't think he would do that to her, though.

He stares at me for a long moment, then breaks eye contact and turns his attention to his brother. "Candor or Dauntless, Caleb?" he asks, raising an eyebrow. I swear I see fear flash in Caleb's eyes, and I have to stifle a smirk. Caleb doesn't usually hang out with us in our makeshift training room, and I'm positive that he does not have an aptitude for Dauntless, that's for sure. He thinks a lot of our dares are crazy and dangerous.

"Pansycake," Uriah mutters.

"Pansy-what?" Ezekiel says, looking at his little brother like he's lost his mind.

"Pansycake," Beatrice says. "He heard some Dauntless kid about three years below us say it. The Dauntless girl that sits by me in Faction History said that it's supposed to be this huge insult, but no one uses it any more."

"Well, I'm gonna bring it back," Uriah insists. "Hmmm…" Uriah taps his chin. "What do you think you're gonna choose on Friday?" Friday is the choosing ceremony. It's only two days away; tomorrow, Ezekiel, Caleb and I will take our aptitude tests. Ezekiel and I are going to Dauntless; Uriah and Beatrice will follow us next year. On the surface, Caleb is a perfect Abnegation, but I have gotten to know him pretty well, and I am just not sure his true thoughts and feelings match the facade.

Caleb's eyes dart from face to face.

"Oh, come on, man," Ezekiel says, rolling his eyes. "You know all four of us are going to Dauntless. We're not going to be calling you a faction traitor or anything."

Caleb looks guiltily around the room then sighs in concession. "Fine," he says. "I- well, I mean, I'll see what my test says tomorrow but… I think maybe Erudite." Beatrice gasps, and I elbow her in the side. Ezekiel _just_ said we wouldn't give him a hard time. I know, though, that her father doesn't like Erudite at all, so I'm sure the revelation _does_ seem like the makings of a faction traitor to her. It kind of does to me, too- my father was friends with Erudite's leader, Jeanine Matthews, for most of my life, but even he seems unable to tolerate her any more.

"I'll see what my test says," Caleb mutters, looking down at his hands.

Uriah pipes in, "Hey, it's cool, Cale. I mean, it's not like any of the rest of us are sticking around Abnegation, right? You go where you belong. Beatrice might have been a little surprised…" he glares in her direction and she looks guilty. "...but I can see it. You can do some good with all that knowledge and crap."

"Thank you for your oh-so-eloquent approval, Uriah," Caleb teases with a grin. "Okay," he says, his eyes settling on me. "Tobias. Candor or Dauntless."

Dares always carry the risk that I could be caught doing something I shouldn't, and Marcus would find out. "Candor," I say.

"Are you a virgin?" he says jokingly, obviously thinking he knows the answer and that it's the same as every other dependent my age in Abnegation- an obvious yes.

Only it's not.

My face heats up and I shift uncomfortably. "Um… well… uh…" I bite my lip and pull off my baggy gray Abnegation coat.

"You're such a Stiff, Tobias," Ezekiel chuckles, rolling his eyes. 'Stiff' is the slur other factions use to describe the Abnegation. "You sure you're ready to transfer to Dauntless in two days? C'mon, you don't need to be embarrassed about being a virgin; we all are." Oh, if only he knew the real answer… and who else in this room has an answer that matches mine. Beatrice shifts uncomfortably next to me; I can only hope that her brothers will think she's just shy about the subject in general, rather than guessing the real reason for her embarrassment.

"Ezekiel," I say, hurrying to change the subject. "Candor or Dauntless?"

"Dauntless," he says proudly.

I rub the back of my neck as I think. Ezekiel isn't like Caleb; he'll do pretty much any dare I throw at him. We all grew up playing Candor, but one day a few months ago, Ezekiel heard some Dauntless kids talking about Candor or Dauntless and thought it was a great idea. Once in awhile, instead of or after our secret training at night, we'll play the game. He's done everything from jumping a train to scaling the sculpture outside the upper levels school that the Dauntless dependants like to climb. "Go into that creepy abandoned movie theater on Grand Avenue- _alone, _no taking Beatrice or Uriah- and find something to bring back out with you." Ezekiel may be brave, but he's braver with his little brother or sister with him. I think Beatrice is probably the most Dauntless of us all.

The game continues until Caleb looks at his watch and announces that it's after one o'clock. We all have to be at school tomorrow, so sadly, we decide to head home. This is really our last night of fun and games together- ever, probably, as I'm positive Caleb will not come along with Ezekiel and me to Dauntless- and it's hard to let it end.

Beatrice and I trail several yards behind the others. Caleb glances back at us with narrowed eyes once, and my heart pounds a little harder, but then he turns back to his conversation with Ezekiel and Uriah, and seems to forget about Beatrice and me dawdling behind them. Tris and I have always been very close, so it shouldn't look too suspicious.

"Two days," she says, cutting into the silence between us, her voice breaking. "I can't believe after two days, we'll be apart for a whole year."

She looks into my eyes. I see tears pooling in hers, and I am taken aback by the fear and pain I see in them. Sometimes I have wondered whether there's _anything_ Beatrice is afraid of, so it catches me off guard. She quickly looks away.

"It will be okay, Tris," I reassure her quietly. "A year will feel long, but then we can start our lives together. When we see each other again when you join Dauntless, everything will be how it was, but better. I promise. And we'll see each other on Visiting Day.'

"Unless Marcus comes," she reminds me. That is true. If my father shows up at the Dauntless compound, I won't come out to meet him. Unless Ezekiel can sneak Beatrice and Uriah off somewhere to see me, Marcus's presence would mean that I have to go without seeing my friend and girlfriend. They won't be able to stay long, either, if they plan to see Caleb as well.

I sigh. "Well, let's just hope that he doesn't."

We pause across the street in a shadow when the Prior's house comes into view and we watch Beatrice's three brothers climb the tree into Uriah and Beatrice's window. Ezekiel and Uriah climb easily while Caleb moves much more slowly. He hates climbing in and out of that window.

I look at Beatrice. I want to kiss her so badly, but her brothers might see. "I wish I could kiss you goodnight," I whisper.

"But I know you can't," she replies. "I had better hurry and catch up to them. I love you. Meet me at the training room tomorrow night?"

I shake my head. "Better meet me at my house," I tell her. "In case Marcus…"

Beatrice nods, then grabs my hand and gives it a quick squeeze. "I love you, Tobias. Good night." She turns and dashes across the street on silent feet. I watch her shimmy up the tree, quick, like a squirrel until she slows near the top, hindered by Caleb's slow progress. Then she disappears through the window.

One more night with my Tris, then a year of loneliness. All I can do now, is make the most of tomorrow.


	2. Chapter 2

**ABNEGATION HELLIONS**

**CHAPTER TWO**

_**Tobias POV**_

I meet Beatrice at the side of my house, under my bedroom window. I narrowly escaped a beating from Marcus; I was looking at the things I have collected into the trunk my mother gave me, and barely got them put away as I heard my father coming up the stairs. I was tired and had to fight sleep as I looked at my few scavenged possessions, but I'm sure glad I managed to stay awake. Had I fallen asleep, I'm sure I'd be in a lot of pain right now; I barely managed to hide my things and remove the desk chair I had wedged under the door handle. I couldn't allow myself to nod off knowing that this is my last night with my girl.

Beatrice comes around the corner and when she sees me, her face relaxes in relief. It would have been awful to have to spend our last night together with her patching up my back. But we're both here now, unharmed.

I pull her around the corner, behind the house, so that a large bush obscures us from any prying eyes. She presses herself against me, her body molding against mine, and I capture her lips in a scorching hot kiss. We break apart both short of breath.

"Ezekiel and Caleb?" I ask.

"Already asleep," she whispers. "And Uri knows we need some time alone. He won't bother us. I'm sure that if I'm wrong about Zee or Cale, he'll make sure _they_ don't, either." Beatrice sometimes uses nicknames for all three of her brothers- very un-Abnegation of her- but the only person I use a nickname for, and not often, is Beatrice. Uriah called her Tris when they were very little, and now I do, sometimes, too.

I pat my pocket to make sure I remembered protection before I grab her hand and we begin in the direction of the train platform. The first few times we had sex were in the heat of the moment, but when it really hit me what a dangerous game _that_ was, I listened carefully in the bathrooms at school and learned what I needed to get so that Beatrice and I could be safe in our _special_ times together. In Abnegation, they don't teach us anything about preventing pregnancy... or much of anything about sex in general, other than that it is only for married couples, and only for the purpose of procreation. Now that I've experienced it, though, I seriously doubt that everyone in Abnegation is really selfless enough to _only_ make love to create babies. I think it's just... something they tell us, not something anyone _really_ follows.

It wasn't easy swallowing my embarrassment, but I went into the clinic near the Upper Levels School and obtained a bag full of condoms, ignoring the incredulous look from the nurse I whispered my request to. I suspect that may very well have been the first Abnegation she ever had ask for protection- or at least, the first Abnegation dependent. Regardless, I felt a little more Dauntless by the time I left, and certainly felt _much_ less apprehensive about my indiscretions with Beatrice. I'm not sure if I could ever forgive myself if I left her pregnant and alone here. Sure, she'd have Uriah, but the way she'd be treated as a pregnant, unmarried teenager here in Abnegation is... I can't even imagine it. I'm also quite sure that she would be in danger if Marcus ever knew that she and I were involved.

We kiss leisurely as we wait for the train. When it arrives, we run alongside it as we've watched the Dauntless do so many times, and as we have now done many times as well, then I grab the handle and throw myself in first, Beatrice following.

It was Uriah that first wanted to jump the trains, and he and Beatrice had been doing so for months before they told the rest of us and invited us along. Uriah, especially, has always felt a strong pull to Dauntless. It makes sense- he was born there. Beatrice's mother, Natalie Wright Prior, was born in Dauntless, but transferred to Abnegation at her Choosing Ceremony when she was sixteen. Despite their separation, when Natalie's cousin and best friend, Hana Wright Pedrad, had her first child- Ezekiel- she named Natalie and Andrew Prior as his godparents. Hana and Mike Pedrad's second child, Uriah, was only a month old when Hana and Mike, both gate guards, were killed in the line of duty; the story goes that a band of Factionless attacked the fence and Mike died trying to protect his wife, but ultimately failed to save her.

Ezekiel and Uriah were immediately placed into the custody of Hana's best childhood friend and cousin, and Natalie and Andrew Prior legally adopted the boys and raised them as their own. Ezekiel was a year and a half old and Uriah just six weeks. I can only imagine what chaos that was, as the Priors had their own two children already- Caleb, who had just turned a year, and Beatrice, only three weeks old at the time.

Uriah and Beatrice have grown up as twins, and everyone in Abnegation considers them so, though they look nothing alike. Beatrice is short and slight, her skin creamy white. Her grayish-blue eyes are large and round, and her Abnegation bun is a honey blond. Uriah, on the other hand, is sturdy and tall- taller than Zeke already, and almost as tall as me- with bronze skin, chocolate brown eyes, and dark hair that, just before it's time to cut it Abnegation short again, begins to curl at the ends. Still, they've grown up as twins and are close as can be.

Once we are both in the train car, I lead Beatrice to a far corner and sit down, pulling her with me. She straddles my lap and we wrap our arms around one another, and for a long moment, we just hold each other. I hear Beatrice suck in a shaky breath and I try to pull back, but she just holds on tighter, keeping her head on my shoulder. "I can't believe this is it," she says in a strangled voice. She is so strong all the time... I am surprised that she is letting it show how much this is affecting her. Or maybe it's simply affecting her a lot more than I thought it would.

"It isn't goodbye forever, Tris." I try to sound soothing, but my voice betrays me and cracks on her name. "It's... it's just a year. We can make it a year. Then we can start our life together."

"I don't know how I'll-" she swallows hard. "A year sounds so long, Tobias. I'm really going to miss you. I love you so much. You're my best friend."

My heart physically hurts as she sniffles into my shoulder and I really finally allow myself to realize just how _long_ a year will be. I have worked so hard to tell myself it's short, it's "only" a year, it will go by in a flash.

But it won't. She's right, it won't. Just the thought of going all that time without seeing her beautiful face, feeling her body pressed against mine, holding her in my arms, kissing her soft pink lips... and I feel like I am drowning. She is the only person I have ever trusted with my secrets. She found out about Marcus, she has dressed my wounds countless times, and not once has she given me that pitying look, like I'm a kicked puppy. "I can stay. We can stay here if you want to, Beatrice," I offer, giving in to the panic.

"No!" she yelps. "No, you can't stay. You know you can't. And I don't want to stay here either. We... will just have to get through it. No matter how hard it is, no matter what happens... at the end of a year, we'll be together again." Beatrice pulls away from me and looks me in the eye. The moonlight shines off the tears on her cheeks, and I brush them away with my thumbs. "I'd never forgive myself if you stayed here, with that _monster_, because of me. We have to think of our futures, Tobias."

"I love you, Beatrice," I whisper before I crash my lips against hers. It is just Beatrice and me in here, just us in the world for a while as we say our goodbyes. Tomorrow I will have to be strong and leave Beatrice Prior behind.

* * *

**_Tris POV_**

At the Hub the next morning, while all the other factions herd toward the elevators, the Abnegation take the stairs. It would be selfish to take the elevator when there are so many waiting to use it. That's Abnegation for you- the selfless faction. There is, however, a certain beauty in it, and for a moment, I think I could see myself staying here, raising my baby in gray alongside Tobias. That image combined with the constant fear and anxiety I have been living with for weeks has me instantly looking for the man I love, wanting to run to him and tell him to stay, we can make it work here, we'll figure something out to keep us safe from Marcus...

But before I can get to the top of the twentieth flight of stairs and search for Tobias, my legs get tired, and I become bored of the monotony that is as present in every other Abnegation custom just as it is in this one, and I realize that being safe from Marcus while still in Abnegation is a pipe dream, and I could never be happy here anyway.

So I brace myself for a year without Tobias or Ezekiel, and to say goodbye to Caleb, maybe forever.

As I turn in the hallway of the twentieth floor, to speak with my brothers before they find their place in line, Tobias comes toward me alongside Marcus and catches my eye. Uriah and I face him, but Mom, Dad, Ezekiel and Caleb aren't looking his way. _I love you,_ I see him mouth. I can't respond without attracting unwanted attention, so I give him a small smile and try to convey my feelings for him with the look in my eyes.

And I just pray that Tobias will wait for me, even when he sees all those taller, prettier, curvier, _better_ Dauntless girls. It is a selfish thought; I know he deserves better than what I can give him. But if I come to Dauntless in a year only to find that my child's father has moved on... I don't know what I will do.

I must have faith in our love.

"Well... this is it," Uriah says beside me, snapping me back to attention.

I will have plenty of time later to think about Tobias and what I am facing this next year. These are our last moments as a complete, intact family. My attention needs to be on Caleb and Ezekiel.

"Mom, Dad," Ezekiel says, his eyes glassy. "Thank you for _everything_ you have done for Uriah and me. I love you both. And Caleb, Uriah, Beatrice... I couldn't ask for better siblings. I'll miss you all." It has never been any secret that Ezekiel and Uriah will return home to Dauntless when they choose.

My eyes meet Caleb's and we communicate everything that needs to be said wordlessly as Mom and Dad speak to Ezekiel. Mom reaches out and touches his cheek, and Dad pats his shoulder. It is a lot of contact for an Abnegation family.

As they each talk to Caleb as well, I think about how their affection might be negatively perceived by our neighbors and it suddenly hits me. I don't care what anyone else thinks. They are all going to be gossiping about me soon, anyway. So, as soon as Dad finishes speaking with Caleb, I rush forward and first tightly hug Ezekiel. "I love you, Zee," I say, my voice thick with emotion. "We'll join you next year. I'll miss you so much."

"Me too, Tris," he chokes. "Come see me on Visiting Day. Please?"

"I wouldn't miss it," I whisper. Then I release him and repeat the same with Caleb.

I stand back with Uriah as we watch Ezekiel and Caleb file into the choosing room, Mom and Dad following them. Uriah slips his hand into mine and squeezes. "It'll be okay, Tris. We will get through this. You'll see. And remember, you've always got me, sis." He grins and bumps my hip with his.

"I hope you're right," I whisper.


	3. Chapter 3

**ABNEGATION HELLIONS**

**CHAPTER THREE**

_**Zeke POV**_

Visiting Day is finally here.

It has been two weeks since I have seen my family. Now, I know that doesn't sound like that long, and I know it's only a small fraction of the time that will pass before I see them again… but it still feels like forever. I have always been especially close with the twins, Uriah and Beatrice. Not nearly as close as they are with each other, of course; their bond is almost freakish, and I'll never admit to anyone how jealous I have been at times. Still, point is, they're not just my siblings, they're my best friends, and I miss them like hell.

I do still have Tobias, my other best friend. I expected initiation to only bring us closer, but I feel like he is still holding back. I guess that's just how Tobias ― or should I say "Four" ― is. He changed his name when we arrived at Dauntless, as did I. Mine changed as soon as I jumped off that building and was pulled out of the net I landed in. (Third jumper right here, pretty good for an Abnegation transfer, am I right? Four was last.) I adapted Tris's nickname for me and now go by Zeke. Four's name was given to him by our instructor, Amar, after our fear landscapes the first day. He set a new record by having only four fears. I had twelve.

"You're comin', right?" I say to Four, elbowing him in the arm. He glares at me.

"I don't know, Zeke," he sighs. "What if my dad is there? I don't want to see him." I don't know why he hates his dad so much; that's something he has never shared with me. And if Four doesn't want to share something, he won't. There is no coaxing it out of him.

"Four," I scold him. "You know Beatrice will be pissed if she doesn't get to see you, and she _will_ shoot the messenger. Which is who, this time? Oh yeah. _Me._"

He hangs his head. "I do want to see her and Uriah. And your parents, too." He sighs. "We can go look, but if Marcus is there, you'll just have to break it to Beatrice that I can't see her today. She will understand, Zeke."

I narrow my eyes at him. I don't understand their friendship. Okay, I'll admit it ― I am a little jealous. Actually, now that I think about it, I am kind of the odd man out. Never as much as Caleb was, though. We all love him, but he just didn't fit in with the rest of us. He was always much more at home with our Abnegation neighbors, Susan and Robert.

"Fine," I concede.

And, unfortunately, when we reach the Pit, Four almost immediately spots Marcus and shrinks back, away from where he might be seen. "Sorry, Ezekiel," he says, shaking his head. Before I can protest, he has turned and disappeared down a tunnel.

When I reach my family, I hug Mom first, then Dad. I come to Beatrice next and linger. She feels a little more solid than last time I hugged her. Good, she was too skinny. "I'm sorry, Beatrice," I murmur. "As you might have guessed, Four, I mean Tobias, isn't coming because of his dad." When I pull back, although I see understanding in her eyes, just as Four had predicted, I also see tears and something that almost looks like panic. I am about to ask her what is going on when Uriah pulls my attention away.

"Ezekiel, man, I've missed you!" he says, loud and excited. We "man-hug", as others around here have called it. This time I lean in and whisper, "Keep training, and add knives."

Uriah looks a little confused for a split second, then his brain catches up to the quick subject change and he nods.

"I'm afraid we can't stay very long," Mom apologizes. "We must go to Erudite as well, to see Caleb."

I frown but nod. I'll have my little brother and sister back in less than a year. Caleb is isolated from the rest of the family forever.

Marcus approaches a few minutes later, interrupting our precious family time. "Excuse me, Ezekiel, but do you know where I can find Tobias?" he asks. I am no longer used to the constant over-polite demeanor of the Abnegation after a few weeks in Dauntless. I never noticed before how practiced Marcus's demeanor is, like it is a little too perfect.

"I'm sorry, Marcus, but I don't know what Tobias was planning to do today. I'm sorry he hasn't made it here yet." Behind him, up on a path high above the Pit, I see a glimpse of Tobias looking on with a pained expression. He turns and disappears back into the shadows.

"Thank you anyway, Ezekiel," Marcus says with a forced smile. "I'll leave you to your reunion, then. Please tell my son that I was sorry to have missed him."

"I will," I agree.

* * *

_**Beatrice POV**_

"Where did you even get these?" Uriah asks, examining the knife in amazement.

I giggle. "They were in one of the closets in that back room there." Our training room is what we believe to have been an old police training center from before the war. A lot of equipment, to our surprise, was still here. Most of the closets are more than a little disorganized, so it has been difficult to really take stock of our resources; none of us ever wanted to spend these stolen hours cleaning out old closets rather than honing our skills. I finally resolved to spend a few minutes of each visit picking through the storage spaces, and it paid off the other day when I found a half-dozen throwing knives.

I continue adjusting my stance and aim, getting closer to the center of our makeshift target little by little. I found a book at the school library that had a tutorial on knife throwing, though I had to be pretty sneaky to look for such a thing. The Abnegation do not read for pleasure or study things unnecessary for their volunteer duties and schoolwork. What we are doing ― exercising our own hobbies and interests ― is self-indulgent and decidedly un-Abnegation.

Whatever. Everyone will know very soon how un-Abnegation I am.

"So… what's your plan, Beatrice?" Uriah asks for the millionth time.

"I don't want to discuss it right now," I say… for the millionth time as well… as I let another knife fly.

"Beatrice Grace Prior!" Uriah shouts, making me jump. Uriah never gets harsh like this. I stare at him with wide eyes. "You can't just put this conversation off forever, you know that? Sooner than later, it's going to be obvious to _everyone._ You don't seriously want to wait for Mom and Dad to figure it out on their own, do you?"

Tears pool in my eyes. "I'm _scared_, Uriah!" I whimper. "How do I explain this? What the hell am I supposed to tell them? 'Hey Mom and Dad, just a little minor issue I need to mention… You know how you were never going to get to know your grandchildren because we were all transferring? Well, guess what! Now you get to know two of them for a little while before I go! Surprise ― I'm pregnant with twins!' I don't think so, Uri!"

"I don't know what you say, Tris," he sighs. "But I know I will be beside you every step of the way."

I fall into my brother's arms and rest my head against his broad shoulder. Last week, he ditched class with me in order to force me to visit the clinic that is located about ten blocks from the upper levels school we attend. It seems we ended up with the same nurse who helped Tobias when he stopped in, because she made a comment about those condoms being "too little too late" as she looked at me with disdain. If that's how an Erudite responds to teenage pregnancy, what will the Abnegation say?

Anyway. The midwife that eventually came in and did an ultrasound informed me that not only am I, indeed, pregnant… but the ultrasound was showing not one, but _two_ fetuses- twins- and I am now three months along, due five months before my Choosing Day.

"What are you going to do about Tobias?" he asks, still hugging me.

I shrug. "I don't think I have much choice, Uri. We'll just have to show up to Dauntless on Choosing Day with baby twins in tow."

"He's going to be upset that you didn't tell him before he left," Uriah warns.

I tense. I miss Tobias so much. I dream about him, I cry myself to sleep most nights. I don't know how I will make it through this year without him, and Uriah knows that. I don't need a guilt trip. I feel guilty enough already.

"I know that!" I snap, stepping away from him and crossing my arms over my expanding chest defensively. "It was the right thing to do, Uri. He would have stayed. You know I couldn't let him stay. But then _Marcus_"- I spit his name like an expletive- "had to go and ruin Visiting Day, too."

I sigh, and Uri kisses the top of my head. I take a deep breath as I pull away from him. "Come on," I say, "let's get back to these knives."


	4. Chapter 4

_**A/N: Thank you so much for your follows, favorites and reviews! Guest, sorry for taking it down... I didn't like where I had it going and had a little freak-out. I walked away from it for like a year before I reread it and started developing some new/different/better ideas.**_

_**I probably won't post 4 chapters in a week ever again, but here's one more. After this I'll have to slow down to once or twice a week or else, because it will definitely slow down once I have posted everything I have written so far. **_

* * *

**ABNEGATION HELLIONS**

**CHAPTER FOUR**

_**Tobias POV**_

The dining hall is filled with people in what I suppose is their Dauntless best: some are hardly wearing a stitch of clothing in order to show off all their tattoos. Today is Initiation Day, one of the many occasions the Dauntless use as an excuse to get wasted. As if they need an excuse.

It has been one month since I left Abnegation, and two weeks since I let my fear of Marcus overshadow my desire to see Beatrice. Today, I will find out for sure whether I made it into Dauntless.

I have been ranked first throughout initiation. I didn't lose a single fight, and I was on the winning team in Capture the Flag. My times for my fear simulations are among the best. And today at the fear landscape, our final test, of course I was the fastest, as the rest of the initiates had at least twice ― usually more than three times ― the number of fears that I had to face.

And yet, I still feel nervous. I think it is because so much is at stake. I left Beatrice to come here, we have a plan. If I don't pass and I instead end up factionless, I will have thrown it all away, all of both mine and Beatrice's hopes and dreams of a life together.

"Look, here comes Max!" hisses Shauna, a Dauntless-born, while nudging my arm. Zeke and I befriended her when she asked for my help with fighting.

Max, Dauntless' head leader, climbs onto a table and taps his microphone. Shauna hugs Zeke's arm like a lifeline. They have been spending more and more time together lately. I recognize the way Shauna looks at him; it is so similar to the way Beatrice looks at me. Shauna glances nervously at her younger sister, Lynn, whose face, for once, is more anxious than scowling. Lynn's best friend Marlene grabs Lynn's hand, looking as though her anticipation almost matches that of the initiates. Next to me, an Amity transfer named Mia chews on her lip.

"Attention," Max says into the microphone. The crowd slowly quiets down. "When this year's scrawny bunch of initiates jumped into Dauntless, I wondered if _any_ of them were going to make it through initiation and become full members." The crowd chuckles politely. "They have now completed the three stages of initiation: stage one, the physical stage; stage two, the simulation stage; and stage three, the fear landscape. To my surprise, every one of them have earned the required scores for Dauntless membership." Feet stomp and fists pump. Shauna visibly relaxes, and I realize just how nervous she was that she might not become a member of Dauntless.

I glance at the table to the right of ours, where most of the other transfer initiates sit: three Candor and an Erudite transfer named Eric, who shoots me a glare. Eric has hated Zeke and me from the moment we jumped onto the train, dressed in gray, after the Choosing Ceremony, and his disdain for me has only grown as I consistently stay a step ahead of him in the rankings.

"We aren't big on speeches here," Max continues, "so I'll give you what you've all been waiting for. Here it is: the rankings!" As the last words leave Max's lips, the screen behind him lights up, listing our entire initiate class from the top ranked to the bottom. My eyes scan the list, first looking for Zeke, who I find on the fifth line, and Shauna, who I see ranked eighth.

I start again at the top and I see listed in first place is my name, "Four", with my photo next to it.

I scan down the rankings. Eric's name is just after mine, in second place. I also see that Shauna is immediately followed by Mia, who ranked ninth. There are fifteen new members in total, but I don't bother paying attention to the rankings of those I hardly know.

My lips turn up into a smile and Zeke claps my back. "Way to go, Four!" he shouts over the ruckus that surrounds us. I can feel Eric's glare on me, more hateful than ever, but I don't care. Not only have I made it into Dauntless, I will also get first pick of jobs. I can set up a good life for myself and Beatrice, and that is all I have ever wanted.

Next to me, Zeke turns toward Shauna and I see her face fall a bit as he pulls her into a hug. I know she was hoping he would kiss her. Zeke is so oblivious.

"Thank god we made it," Zeke laughs. "Can you imagine how mad the twins would be if they showed up next year and one ― or both ― of us was gone?"

"That's exactly what I was imagining, until I saw our names up there," I groan. "After I missed them on Visiting Day, your sister might have actually killed me."

"So?" Mia cuts in. "Will you finally try a drink, Four?" She dangles a flask in front of me. I grab it out of her hand and unscrew the lid before swallowing a swig of the spirits inside. The alcohol burns as it goes down my throat, but makes me feel warm.

"I drank a few weeks ago," I protest. "At the dare game. Just cause you weren't there to see it doesn't mean it didn't happen."

Zeke laughs. "It's true, don't you remember how hungover he was for his fight with Eric?" Zeke playfully punches my shoulder. "It's a wonder you beat him, Four." I scoff.

"Okay, okay, it's time we celebrate!" Shauna squeals. "Let's play dare!"

Soon we have gathered together a group, but as we walk to the train platform, my heart clenches remembering the last time we played Dare. It was my initiation instructor, Amar, that invited me and Zeke, and we were the only transfers among the group of Dauntless. Amar took a special interest in me after seeing Marcus in my fear landscape. I wish he could celebrate my victory with me today. Instead, I attended his funeral last week after he was found dead by the train tracks. It was ruled a suicide, but I just know that Eric had something to do with it, I can feel it in my bones. Like me, Amar was divergent, and Tori, the Dauntless tattoo artist who administered my aptitude test, has told me how dangerous divergence can be.

**-oOo-**

Mia drops into the web of arms after she releases herself from the zipline sling, a smile bright on her face, and Shauna tosses her the flask. After taking a long drink, Mia's eyes fall on me. "Four," she says with a glint in her eye. "Hmmm… I dare you to run through the library in Erudite Headquarters…" she grins. "Naked."

"Oooh," a few croon. I feel my face heat up as if it's on fire.

Zeke is nearly doubled over laughing. "Yeah, take it off, Stiff!" he chortles and I glare at him. Most people have already forgotten where I came from, and I would like it to stay that way. He instantly stops laughing and shrinks back.

I sigh. "Fine, come on."

The cuts on my back have now healed, and a flame tattoo covering my rib cage conceals most of the evidence left behind by Marcus's belt. In the dark, no one will see it; I will just have to run fast enough that no one inside the library gets a good look at me.

We jump off the train when we reach Erudite, and we all head toward their central building. I choose a side door and Zeke waits beside it. I quickly strip off all my clothes, covering my groin with my hands as I don't really want everyone getting a good look at what only Beatrice has seen. I take a deep breath and throw open the door, darting through the library to a backdrop of startled gasps. A couple of scrawny looking security guards begin to chase me and I run faster; they can't catch me. I hear a commotion behind me and almost pause when a glance back reveals Caleb sprawled in front of the guards, a stack of books scattered around him. He winks at me as I run out the door and I realize that he did it on purpose to slow up the security guards and keep me out of trouble. I try to shoot him a look of gratitude before I quickly turn my attention in front of me again.

Once I am outside I dart behind the nearest building. Zeke soon catches up, laughing and out of breath, and hands me my pile of clothes. I quickly pull them on. When we rejoin the group a block away from the library, I hear a sound behind us and I put up a hand and shush everyone to silence them. I am relieved when it is Caleb that comes around the corner.

"Caleb!" Zeke shouts joyfully. He bounds up to his brother like an overexcited puppy and tackles him in a hug. Caleb grins as he reciprocates.

"Who's that?" Shauna whispers to me.

"Zeke's brother," I reply. "He created a diversion to slow down the guards in there. He chose this year, too." I step away from her and give Caleb a high five-turned-handshake.

"Everyone, this is my brother, Caleb," Zeke says, still grinning. "Caleb, this is… everyone." Caleb waves. Zeke turns to him. "So, did you pass initiation, smarty-pants?"

Caleb laughs. "Yeah, actually, at _almost_ the top of my class. Looks like you two are still Dauntless as well?"

"_Four_ here ranked first," Zeke says, putting a hand on my shoulder. I know he is really just making sure that Caleb learns my new name before he tips off everyone to my identity.

"Yeah, yeah, it's _you_ that surprises me. They really let you stay, huh?" Caleb grins.

Zeke clasps his hands over his heart. "You wound me, bro!"

Lynn, Shauna's sister, clears her throat. "This reunion is fun and all," she says, sounding bored, "but I think it's time that Four picks the next victim."

"We're playing dare," I explain to Caleb.

He rolls his eyes. "I gathered. I will let you all get back to your game. Congratulations on your initiation." We nod to each other one more time and he disappears back into the shadows as he returns to the library.

I dare Marlene to climb the big metal sculpture in nearby Millennium Park. She almost falls once, but makes it up and back down safely. Next, she picks Zeke.

"Zeke," she calls out, taking a long sip of vodka. "I dare you… to go to Abnegation and egg Marcus Eaton's house."

Zeke's eyes widen and he glances at me, like he is asking just how bad of an idea this is. It is a _very_ bad idea, and I try to tell him so with the look I shoot back at him.

But this is Zeke. He won't back down from a dare.

When we arrive in Abnegation, a Dauntless-born named Elliott pulls a dozen lukewarm eggs, wrapped in a few plastic bags, out of the backpack he has been carrying. "Eww," Marlene says as Zeke opens the carton and we see that two have broken. Zeke shrugs.

We all start toward my former home. I am only a few houses away from Beatrice right now. I hang back so I am following slightly behind the group. When I see the Prior residence across the street, I slow even more. Quickly looking both ways, I position myself to dash across the street so I can climb the tree outside her window.

"Four!" someone hisses. I pause and turn to see Shauna. She tilts her head to the side. "Where are you going?"

"Uh," I stutter. "Um, I was just…." I trail off and stare at her, glance back at Beatrice's window, then look anywhere but at Shauna's eyes. "Nothing. Forget it."

Shauna doesn't look convinced, and she looks at the Prior home for a few seconds, then back at me. But a moment later the pounding of combat boots on cracked asphalt thunders toward us, getting louder and louder as the group of Dauntless nears us.

"Come on, we gotta go!" Zeke pants. "Damn, I'd love to climb that tree right now and see the twins, but he's after us! Good thing he's slow."

I am sure fear flashes in my eyes as I grab Shauna's wrist and take off at a sprint, not stopping until we are on the train.

I can only hope that Shauna forgets about my attempted detour and doesn't say a word about it to Zeke.


	5. Chapter 5

**ABNEGATION HELLIONS**

**CHAPTER FIVE**

**Beatrice POV**

I pour the canned peas into a serving bowl and carry it to the table as Uriah cooks the plain, bland chicken breasts. He adds not even a sprinkle of salt on them; seasonings are, somehow, considered self-indulgent here in Abnegation. I turn to the front door as I hear it swing shut, and my father gives me a small smile as he carries his briefcase into the living room and leaves it next to his worn, gray armchair near the fireplace.

"Beatrice, please finish setting the table," my mother says gently. I didn't realize I had paused until she reminded me of what I should be doing.

I set out the silverware, a fork to the left of each plate and a knife and spoon to the right, and Uriah gives me a small smile as he moves a piece of chicken from the pan onto each plate. Before I turn away I see him glance at my stomach then back in my eyes reminding me I cannot put my task off any longer. If you knew to look for it, you could now see the bulge of my stomach even through my loose, shapeless Abnegation clothing.

When we are all seated in our usual places at the table, me across from Mom and next to Dad, and Uriah between Mom and me, we all hold hands and say grace. It still feels strange having to reach my arms this far when we bless the meal. My eyes wander to the two empty chairs that now sit against the wall, the chairs Ezekiel and Caleb used to occupy.

As we begin to eat, Mom reaches out and takes Dad's hand in hers. I stare at their joined hands; other than blessing each meal, I rarely see my parents touch. How can the sight feel so strangely intimate, like such a private moment, when I have touched Tobias in far more intimate ways?

"So," Mom says, looking at Dad tenderly. "Tell me." Uriah and I exchange a glance; something isn't right.

"I had a difficult day," he says, and for the first time, I notice how worn he looks. It is a good thing I cannot stay in Abnegation, because clearly I was never cut out for it; I didn't even notice how tired and run-down he looked, but my mother did not miss it. "Marcus and I both." I flinch at the sound of Tobias's father's name; Uriah gives me a warning look, but Mom and Dad don't seem to have noticed.

"What happened?" Mom asks.

Dad sighs. "The Erudite released a report," he explains, "speculating on the reason that so many of Abnegation's children transferred this year." It has been nearly two months since the choosing day. It is rare for an Abnegation to transfer; I suppose this is because we have been raised not to think of ourselves, so even when deciding the rest of our lives, most Abnegation children think of their families first, of what would be the most _selfless_ choice, rather than what they want in their own lives. Not so with Ezekiel, Tobias and Caleb. And neither will it be for me or Uriah.

What consequences will my parents face when Uriah and I transfer next summer?

"What did it say?" I blurt out, and Mom gives me a warning look, but her eyes are still soft and kind.

"Why don't you take this opportunity to listen to your father, Beatrice?" It is phrased as a suggestion, but I know better. Children are not to speak at the dinner table unless we are directly spoken to. Our listening ears are a gift to our parents; they will give us their listening ears after dinner, when we gather in front of the fire. I can just imagine the look Caleb would have given me if he were here. In contrast, Uriah just watches the scene in rapt attention, listening anxiously for Dad's answer. Uriah, Ezekiel and I never been as good as Caleb at reigning in our curiosity. Caleb was always good at following the rules, pretending to fit in. He even fooled me for a long time, until Ezekiel told me how much time Caleb spent reading books in their shared bedroom. He has a thirst for knowledge and he soaks it up like a sponge.

"It said," my father answers, "that Marcus' and my violence and cruelty toward our sons is the reason they chose Dauntless and Erudite instead of Abnegation." I gasp, and Uriah and I share a look. We both know that the report was absolutely right when it comes to Marcus, but Mom and Dad have never laid a hand on any of us.

"We both know that is a lie; you are a wonderful, kind and gentle father," Mom says and I nod in agreement. "And Marcus? Cruel?" My mother shakes her head. "That poor man. As if he needs to be reminded of his loss."

"Of his son's betrayal, you mean?" My father frowns. "We all knew Ezekiel would leave us. Caleb was a surprise, and I can't say I'm not disappointed. But Tobias never gave his father any indication. He already lost his wife. I am shocked at Tobias's selfishness."

Without thinking, I open my mouth to speak and Uriah kicks me under the table. I yelp. "Beatrice?" Mom says. "Are you alright?"

"I ― I'm fine," I stutter. "I apologize. Don't let me interrupt you."

"Beatrice, why don't you help me clear the table while Mom and Dad finish their discussion," Uriah says pointedly. I nod and smile in appreciation. I don't know how much longer I could have listened to my parents' comments about Marcus and Tobias and kept my protests to myself.

As we wash the dishes, I lean closer to Uriah. "What's going to happen when we leave, Uri?" I hiss. "Or even just when I start showing… when I have the twins? They're attacking Dad already."

"I don't know, Beatrice," he sighs, "but there's not much you can do about it now. You are already starting to show. You're still telling them tonight, right?"

My stomach twists. I have been dreading this for months. "I don't know, maybe tonight isn't a good time. Dad has already had such a bad day."

"Exactly," Uriah argues, "it's already a bad day. Why ruin a good one?"

His words are a slap in the face. It is bad enough that I have essentially ruined my own life ― I mean, I know babies are always a blessing, and my twins will be too. But honestly, my dread over the judgement I know I will endure, of how different my life will be than I had ever planned… well, right now, these twins don't feel much like a blessing. But I am not only turning my own life upside down, but my parents' too. When I leave for Dauntless, I will escape to a much more accepting faction. My parents will still be here, forever facing the ridicule of their factionmates. They have no escape from it.

"Fine," I sigh. "Might as well get it over with. You only made me more nervous, though."

"Sorry," Uriah mutters while taking the serving bowl I hand him and drying it with a thin white dish towel.

When the kitchen is again clean, we all gather in the living room and Dad and Uriah build a fire. It is only September, but the nights are already starting to get colder.

"Well," Mom says, "children, tell us about your day." She smiles warmly and I consider running upstairs to the bathroom to throw up.

Uriah gives me a hard stare. "Beatrice has something she needs to talk to you about," he says, trapping me into spilling my secret to them tonight. I send him another glare. I don't think I have ever glared at Uriah as much as I have today.

"What is it, Beatrice?" Dad says, looking serious.

I am silent for a minute and they stare at me. The tension builds and builds until it runs out of room inside of me and I have no choice but to either run away, or blurt it out. I take the latter option. This needs to happen. I can't hide it much longer. I am going to be Dauntless, so I need to be brave. "I'm so sorry," I choke out. I take in a shaky breath. "Mom, Dad… I'm pregnant."

Mom gasps, both hands flying to cover her mouth. Dad's face falls and he stands, expressionless. Then he begins to turn red and his eyes show disbelief, then sorrow, then turns to anger.

"How far along are you, Beatrice?" Mom asks in a measured, controlled voice.

"Who did this to you?" Dad asks coldly. I have never seen him like this before.

Uriah and I communicate with our eyes, my glare clearly warning him not to say another word. I will tell them what I want them to know and nothing more, and he had damn well better keep his mouth shut and not add anything that I don't want to admit.

I take a deep breath through my nose and let it out of my mouth to calm myself. "I'm four months along," I say, "with… with twins." Mom can't control her emotions any longer and lets a sob escape. "And, for a number of reasons, I won't be answering Dad's question. Not now, at least."

"Beatrice Edith Prior," my father says, jumping to his feet, "I _demand_ to know who did this to you! How could you be so stupid? How could you ruin your life ― ruin _all_ our lives this way?"

The tears tickle my cheeks as they stream down my face. "Yes, it was stupid, you're right. I guess I won't be following Caleb to Erudite, huh?" I spit. "I obviously didn't _mean_ for this to happen, Dad! I wasn't trying to _ruin your life._ But these babies are coming whether any of us like it or not!" I take a deep breath. "I will tell you who the father is when I am good and ready. All I can say for now is that I must protect myself and my children, and the only way to do that is to keep this information to myself for the time being. Please understand that I cannot say any more."

"Understand?! Do you realize what an unreasonable request that is, Beatrice?" Dad paces back and forth in front of the fireplace. "I thought we raised you to be a good, moral Abnegation girl, not a _slut._"

Mom gasps and jumps up from her chair, and I stumble back as if he had pushed me. "I am not a slut!" I cry. "I have only been with one boy! I… I didn't mean for it to happen, I didn't do this to hurt you, it just ― it just _happened!_ Can't you understand that?!"

"_Tell me who he is, Beatrice!_" Dad roars, and I shake my head furiously.

"I won't!" I scream. "I won't, and you can't make me!" I run to the stairs, stumbling as my eyes blur with tears. I run into my room and slam the door behind me.

I don't know how long I have been crying on my bed when I hear the door open. I hold my breath and listen as footsteps shuffle in. The bed dips as someone sits on it. "Tris," says a voice, deep, but young. Uriah. Thank goodness it is only Uriah.

I turn over and look at him. There is an angry red mark on his cheek. I gasp, sitting up so quickly that it makes me dizzy. "Uri, what happened?"

He sighs. "Dad was so mad... " he swallows hard. "I wouldn't tell him anything. I guess everything today must have been too much for him. I ― I told him off, Tris."

My eyes widen. None of us have ever been disrespectful enough to talk back to our parents. Not until today. I don't remember Ezekiel or Caleb ever speaking to them the way I spoke to Dad just now.

"The things he was saying about you…" my brother continues. "I know he's mad, but I couldn't listen to it any more. Anyway, after he hit me, he looked shocked and horrified and he just turned and walked out the door."

"I think our relationship with Dad is officially ruined," I murmur.

Uriah snorts. "Yeah, I'll say. I'm sorry, Beatrice. You were probably right; this was too much for him to deal with in one day."

"Don't make excuses for him, Uriah," I say forcefully. "There is no excuse for what he just did to you. What did Mom say?"

"She iced my cheek for a few minutes then suggested I check on you. I think she was going to look for Dad."

"I wish Tobias were here…"

"No you don't, Beatrice," my brother snaps. "You know what that would mean."

"I know, I know," I say, "but you know what I mean. I guess I just wish we had been in the same year in school so we wouldn't have to be apart." I have endured two months without Tobias since he left, and I just miss him so much. I try my best to hide it from Uriah, but in that time, I have yet to fall asleep without tears on my face. The pregnancy hormones don't help, I'm sure. I even make Uriah walk with me several blocks out of our way when we come home from school each day, just so I do not have to pass by Tobias' house.

I sigh. "How are we going to make it through this, Uriah?"

He gives me a small smile. "Together, Tris."


	6. Chapter 6

_**Next chapter will be up sometime next week! In the meantime, everyone stay safe and healthy. This whole pandemic thing is all a bit surreal, isn't it? My kids, starting right now, are on an extended Spring Break. Whether that means I get no writing done at all, or more than usual, I cannot predict.**_

_**BIG thanks to everyone has followed, favorited, or reviewed. I love to hear what you think!**_

* * *

**ABNEGATION HELLIONS**

**CHAPTER SIX**

_**Zeke POV**_

I pound on Four's door and jiggle the handle. I don't feel like being patient today. There is no answer. I'm turning around to just go without him when I hear footsteps. "Hey, Zeke," Four says, coming up behind me.

"Oh, good, there you are," I say. Four unlocks his door and motions for me to follow him.

Having grown up in Abnegation, my apartment is reasonably tidy. I have at least somewhat adapted to Dauntless life, though, and it's not immaculate like Four's is. For him, I guess old habits die hard. I swear there's not a speck of dust anywhere in this place.

"So, what's up?" he asks, grabbing two bottles of water out of the fridge and handing me one before he guzzles half of his own.

"I'm going to the training room," I say.

He stares at me, then says, "um, ok… have fun?"

I am surprised he doesn't want to come, and I'm about to leave when I realize what he thought I meant. "Oh! No, not here in Dauntless. Our _old_ training room," I explain. "I haven't seen my brother and sister in almost six months, Four, and I miss them. I just thought you might want to come."

"Oh, sure, of course I'll come," he says, tossing his empty bottle in the trash can and grabbing his jacket, suddenly very eager to come along with me. "You sure they'll be there?"

I follow him out the door and wait as he locks it. "No, of course I'm not sure," I answer. We start down the hall. "But it's a pretty good guess. They're probably there almost every night." Four nods.

"Hey, why don't you bring Shauna to meet them?" he suggests.

I shake my head. I'm not sure how I feel about the idea of introducing her to my siblings yet; we've been friends since initiation, but we just started dating, and it feels too soon. Doesn't matter tonight, though. "Can't. She's at the fence."

We can already see the train light not too far in the distance when we arrive at the platform. Four throws himself into the first open car and I follow. I lean against the wall of the train car as Four holds both handles, his feet at the edge of the open doorway, and leans out into the wind. After a few minutes he retreats into the car and sits against the wall. I sink down next to him and finally notice the way he is rubbing the back of his neck and the worried look on his face.

"What's up, man?" I ask, nudging him with my elbow. "You look nervous. You know it's just Beatrice and Uriah."

A look I can't place flashes across his face before he puts on a smile that doesn't meet his eyes. "It's nothing," he says. "I guess I'm just worried that Beatrice might be upset with me for not seeing her on visiting day."

I roll my eyes. "She was never mad at you in the first place. And even if she was, it's been almost six months, Four. I'm sure she's over it." He worries about the dumbest shit sometimes.

Despite my reassurances, Four is tense when we jump off the train near the makeshift training room. Whatever, let him be his uptight self. I just want to see the twins.

My heart is so light I have to stop myself from skipping. Four would never let me live that down. We arrive at the building and push open the door. Four grabs the flashlight we keep up high on a shelf just inside the door, and we wind through the halls and down the stairs to the basement room. Because of its location, no one can see from outside that someone is in here.

Unfortunately, when we get to the room we trained in for years before coming to Dauntless, the place is dark and empty. Four switches on the lights.

We both survey the room and look at one another with furrowed brows. It is different than the other times we have been here. All of us were good about putting everything away when we were done, Beatrice and Uriah included. I don't think we have _ever_ left the room in any sort of disarray. We were raised in Abnegation, after all.

Four crosses to the makeshift targets the twins must have set up for knife throwing, plywood leaning against the wall with bullseyes spray painted in green. "Someone's gotten pretty good," he comments, inspecting the two knives sticking out of the center of the bullseye.

"And someone else sucks," I chuckle as I pull the third knife out of the corner of the plywood. Two more knives are scattered on the floor. Again, very odd. It doesn't feel right.

The floor is damp near an overturned bottle of water nearby. I pick it up and throw it away. The paper towels are still in the same spot where we have always kept them, and I tear off a few and wipe up the small puddle of water. Four throws knives at the target for a few minutes. He has excellent aim. He never misses.

Then we spar for a few minutes, killing time. We arrived at about eleven-thirty; when we used to come here with the twins, we all usually arrived around eleven.

"You think they'll show up if we wait a while?" I ask hopefully.

Four looks at his watch. "It's after midnight. I think if they were coming tonight they would be here by now." He pauses. "We could go check your old house. Go in the window?"

I shake my head. "No," I answer. "If they're not here, maybe Mom or Dad caught them and are keeping an eye out. If they don't know yet how the twins are sneaking in and out, us showing up there would definitely tip them off." I wonder if they still share a room. It would make sense for Uriah to have moved to Caleb's and my room after the choosing day, but the twins might have thrown a fit about the very idea of being separated. They're so weird. But I love 'em.

Four sighs, looking even more disappointed than I am. "Well, should we head back to Dauntless, then?"

I frown and nod. I really am bummed that I didn't get to see the twins. "Yeah. I've got an early shift in the control room tomorrow. Let's go."

Maybe we'll try again another day. But the untidiness of the training room continues to eat at me, and all I can think is that I hope everything is alright.

**-oOo-**

_**Beatrice POV**_

Our family doesn't own a car, so we have to bring my newborn twins home on the bus. I cringe with every pothole it hits. Not only am I worried about my week-old babies, but every bump sends pain through the incision across my abdomen.

I had hoped that I would be able to give birth to the twins at home. Given the tensions between Erudite and Abnegation, I wanted to avoid letting the Erudite gawk at the slutty Abnegation dependent who got knocked up a year before her Choosing Day, and there was no avoiding that if I had to be admitted to their hospital.

Uriah and I were in our makeshift training room in the factionless sector when the first contraction ripped through me. We left everything where it was and rushed home. Not wanting Mom and Dad to know where we had been, I climbed the tree as quickly as possible, but had to stop halfway up and sit on a branch while I breathed through another bout of overwhelming pain. During the walk home, the contractions had become stronger, with shorter breaks between them.

An hour later, I was checking into the Erudite hospital with Mom and Uriah. With labor having begun just over a month early, Mom said that there was no way we were risking it and laboring at home; the babies could need extra medical care. I am glad she insisted, because not only was she right… but the way the babies had positioned themselves made a natural birth impossible. The twins were born by C-section and immediately whisked off to the infirmary for oxygen. Five-pound, eleven-ounce Landon was returned to me a few hours later, as soon as he had coughed up all the fluid in his lungs and was breathing normally. His tiny four-pound, fourteen-ounce sister, Adeline, was in the NICU with a nasal cannula providing extra oxygen for four days. They kept us all three more days after she was released from the NICU, just to be sure that she was healthy enough to be safely cared for at home.

We disembark in Abnegation, thanking the factionless driver politely on our way off the bus. Uriah carries Landon and Mom carries Adeline, both insisting that I take easy as I am recovering from major surgery. I feel more and more nervous as we come closer to our home. Uriah has barely left my side, and Mom has been in to visit daily, but Dad has yet to meet his grandchildren. I wonder if he will even do more than glance at them. He has barely spoken two words to me since the night I announced my pregnancy.

Throughout Abnegation, I am met with looks ranging from pity to disgust. Mrs. Vaughn, a woman I used to sometimes babysit for, actually crosses to the other side of the street when she sees me coming. This kind of treatment is nothing new; I have endured this sort of response for months now. I cannot wait to get out of this place. My Choosing Ceremony is a little less than six months away. My loose Abnegation robes helped to hide my pregnant belly for a while, but with twins growing in my petite body, by the time I was five months along it was obvious to everyone who laid eyes on me. As selfless as the Abnegation claim to be, it turns out that they are a judgmental bunch and relentless gossips.

With Mom as his messenger, Dad insisted that I should be homeschooled until the babies were born ― his attempt at hiding what a poor job he did at teaching his daughter proper Abnegation values, I guess. It has been a long and lonely four months, but I always have Uriah, and Mom has continued to show me kindness, understanding, and unconditional love. Despite having been born in Dauntless, I can confidently say that she is a better Abnegation than most of this faction.

"Beatrice!" I hear as we reach the pathway to our house. I look up to see my next-door neighbor Susan hurrying over, her brother Robert trailing behind her. Susan and Robert Black are two of the very few who have not shunned me these past months. I know these past six months have been difficult for Susan. For a year before Caleb left, he and Susan had been flirting in the quiet, awkward way that is typical of the Abnegation. Susan had envisioned a future for herself and Caleb, but he chose to leave.

"Oh my goodness, you had your babies!" Susan cheers.

Mom and Uriah adjust their positions so that Susan and Robert can gaze at their faces. Both babies have Tobias' dark blue eyes, but they are sleeping now. Landon has dark wispy hair that curls a little at the ends, and Adeline has my straight blond hair. Both babies have Tobias's olive skin and ears that stick out just a little too much, and his lips. Landon really looks just like him; I am not certain that I will be able to hide Tobias's identity. Mother figured it out right away, though I am sure she already suspected. Adeline's eye shape, chin and nose are mine, though.

"Oh, they're just beautiful!" Susan gushes. "And so tiny. I didn't realize it was already time for them to be here!"

"It wasn't," Uriah replies for me, smiling down at his nephew. "They were about a month early. The doctor said that's common with twins. Adeline needed some help breathing for a few days, but they are both healthy."

"Well, we are happy for you, Beatrice," Robert says kindly. "Remember to let us know if you need anything. Could we bring your family dinner tonight?"

"Thank you so much, but―" I start, not wanting to put them out.

"That would be lovely, Robert. Thank you," Mom interrupts. I look at her questioningly, but she just continues. "I think we should get these little ones into the house, and Beatrice needs to rest. You are welcome to see them again tonight."

"Of course, Mrs. Prior," Susan says with a warm smile. "We will be by around six o'clock." We all say our goodbyes, and I follow Uriah toward the house, Mom bringing up the rear. "Thank you for letting us see them, Beatrice!" Susan calls as she returns to her own home.

**-oOo-**

_**Uriah POV**_

It is one o'clock in the morning… and Adeline has been screaming for an hour. I pace around Beatrice's room gently rubbing Landon's back to keep him calm. Even at only a week old, I think his twin's distress is almost as upsetting to him as Beatrice's is to me. She is sitting on the bed trying to get Adeline to latch on and nurse.

"Just take off the damn blanket, Beatrice," I sigh exasperatedly. She's been trying to get the baby to eat for twenty straight minutes with no luck. I think if she could see what she was doing a little better, she would have more success. "I'm going to take Landon to my room to give you privacy. But if she's still crying in ten minutes, I am making a bottle of formula for her. She is so little, Beatrice. The doctor said that nursing her might not work out since she still hadn't gotten the hang of it."

Beatrice nods, tears streaming down her face. It kills me to leave her like that but I know she will not be successful with the blanket in the way, and I also know she won't take it off with me in the room.

When I step into the hall, my dad is there scowling at me. He barely glances at Landon. "Is your sister going to do something about that child's screaming?" he asks without a hint of patience or compassion.

I glare at him. I am so sick of the way he has been treating Beatrice. I don't recognize this version of my father, and I don't like it one bit.

"She's trying, okay? The baby is premature. It isn't that simple." He scowls and I sigh. "She's having trouble getting her to eat. If Adeline is still crying in a few minutes I will bring in a bottle, okay?"

"Fine," he growls, disappearing back to his bedroom. I catch a glimpse of Mom's sympathetic smile before Dad shuts the door. I know that she wants to come and help, but she doesn't want to upset Dad, and she also told me that she wants Beatrice to have a chance to do it herself. She needs to feel confident of her ability to care for her own children. That won't stop me from helping her, though. I promised her that I would always be there, and I meant it.

Ten minutes later, I bring a bottle of formula into Beatrice's bedroom for her to feed the still crying baby girl. I lay Landon in the crib that occupies the far wall and sit down next to my sister on her bed. Adeline is now desperately sucking on the bottle nipple. Beatrice pulls it away when Adeline sputters and chokes, drinking it too fast, then holds her a little more upright and brings it back to her mouth before she can get herself worked up again.

"We haven't been home even a day and I'm already a failure as a mother," Beatrice whimpers.

"Beatrice, no," I insist. "You are not a failure, not at all. I'm sure all moms feel like they don't know what they are doing at first. It's not your fault that she is struggling. Be thankful she is healthy, and that you have a way to feed her even if she doesn't get the hang of nursing. Tobias would hate to hear you talking that way about yourself, you know."

She sniffles. "Tobias will probably hate me when he finds out all this, anyway," she whispers. "So I'm not sure it matters what you think Tobias would say. He'll hate me, just like Dad does. Ezekiel, probably, too."

"Tris," I groan. "Stop it. Ezekiel won't hate you, and neither will Tobias. He might be mad that you didn't tell him before he left, but you had good reason. Just try not to worry about that. We will cross that bridge when we come to it." I don't say anything about Dad, because honestly, I don't know, maybe he _does_ hate her. He has become someone I do not recognize.

"You should get some sleep, Uri," Beatrice says. "Adeline is okay now. We might be waking you up again sooner than later."

"Want me to sleep in here?" I offer.

She shakes her head. "I'm sure you'll hear us if we _really_ need you. You have to go to school tomorrow. You need to sleep. Thank you, Uriah, I don't know what I would do without you."

I hug Beatrice, being careful not to squish the tiny baby in her arms, and retreat to my bedroom.

Laying on my bed in the darkness, I hear my parents' raised voices through the thin walls.

"She made a mistake, Andrew," Mom says. "She doesn't need your hostility. The consequences she must live with are enough without feeling unwanted in her own home, by her own family."

Dad replies, sounding bitter. "How can I stop being angry, Natalie? She may well cost me my seat on the council! And people already distrust the Abnegation. If Tobias, Ezekiel and Caleb transferring was indication that Abnegation is corrupt, what will come of a leader's underage daughter having children out of wedlock?! I cannot just let that go."

"You are being _selfish_, Andrew." Mom's tone is harsher than I have ever heard it. "I don't like it. You are not acting like the kind, compassionate man I married. I am going to sleep in the spare bed in Beatrice's room and help her with the babies. Perhaps you need some space to reflect."

My heart pounds in my ears as I hear Mom's footsteps in the hall, then Beatrice's door opening and closing. I try to close my eyes, but Mom accusing Dad of selfishness echoes in my head again and again. Of course, I agree with her, but to hear her assign that label to my father ― to his face, no less! ― well, it's shocking. In Abnegation, labeling your spouse as selfish… those aren't words that you just throw around. She is clearly very angry with him.

And what about what Dad was saying about the council? Could they really vote him out over this?

Maybe Erudite is right about Abnegation being corrupt. Just not in the way they think.


	7. Chapter 7

_**A/N: ** Anyone else feel like they're like in a movie or something? Everything all shut down and all that. The rest of the fam was supposed to go out of town for a couple days to help their grandpa with the house he's flipping, and I thought awesome, I can get some writing done! Nope... that just got canceled, about 10 minutes after the hubby and kids took off to head north. I'll keep posting another chapter every 4-5 days while I have them ready, but I have no idea when I'll get the chance to really sit down and write, so I'm feeling at a standstill when it comes to pumping out any new chapters beyond that. In the meantime... I hope this helps entertain you while you're quarantined in your homes!_

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**ABNEGATION HELLIONS**

**CHAPTER SEVEN**

**Beatrice POV**

Uriah carries Adeline in his arms while I carry Landon in mine; we each have our book bags slung over our backs, and Uriah is also loaded down with the diaper bag. I am mostly recovered from the birth, but still a bit sore, so Uriah insisted on carrying the extra bag.

Today was my first day back to school in six months. I missed the last four months of my pregnancy, and am finally going back now that the twins are almost seven weeks old. The idea of leaving my babies in someone else's care is terrifying, but Mrs. Arnold, a newlywed a few blocks down the street who does not yet have her own children, said that they were little angels and everything went well.

Adeline squirms and screams in Uriah's arms as we walk. "What's wrong, Princess?" Uriah asks his niece, gently bouncing her in an attempt to soothe her. "Mrs. Arnold said you were an angel all day. Did you just save up all that crankiness for Uncle Uri?"

"Mrs. Arnold," I say, rolling my eyes, "was lying. 'Adeline' and 'angel' are two words that don't belong in the same sentence. You know that."

"That's not true," Uriah protests. I shoot him a look and he grins. "For example, 'It's too bad Adeline isn't a perfect angel like her brother.'"

I snort; so true. Don't get me wrong, I love this baby girl with all my heart, but she is _not_ an easy baby. She's got colic, and she's got it bad. The doctor says she is perfectly healthy and we just have to wait it out until she outgrows it.

"If you think about it," Uriah continues, "your twins are just like the original Prior twins. I, the boy, am the one who is _so _easy to love... and the girls are trouble." I glare. Uriah's grin only widens. I would punch him if he didn't have my nine-pound daughter in his arms.

"What a beautiful child," says a voice that sends chills up my spine and leaves me frozen in place. I cuddle Landon closer to me, hiding his face in my chest. _I can't let Marcus see him. He'll know._ "Is she alright?"

"Just colicky," Uriah answers cautiously. "She will outgrow it."

"I suspect your father will be relieved when she does," Marcus says. I hate him. His act is good, I'll give him that, but I know what kind of man hides behind that facade.

"I suspect he will," I say politely, plastering a fake smile on my face.

Marcus turns his attention to me. Something about the way he looks at me creeps me out. "I understand that you returned to school today, Beatrice. Were there any problems?"

"No, sir," I respond, trying to wait patiently for a good moment to escape this conversation and this awful man.

"I am glad to hear that," Marcus says. "It would be a pity if everyone found out about your unfortunate circumstances." _Unfortunate circumstances. _What a way to refer to my children. While I may have felt that way myself several months ago, I don't like hearing it. I grimace.

"Of course not, sir." I glance at Uriah.

Uriah jumps to my rescue. "It was nice to see you, Marcus. I think we had better get these little ones home."

"Of course. So nice to see you again, Uriah, Beatrice." He turns and walks up the short concrete path to his home. I don't let out the breath I am holding until I hear his door click shut.

"That was close," I mutter. I don't think Dad has looked closely enough at the babies to see Tobias in them. Tobias looks more like his mother, Evelyn, than his father, and so does Landon. Evelyn passed away nearly eight years ago, and for once that is a good thing; it has been long enough that most Abnegation won't see her in Landon's face. Tobias was never involved in enough community events to make much impression on the adults. "Now we just have to hope we can keep Marcus away from them until the Choosing Ceremony."

Uriah nods, an unusually serious look on his face. "It almost makes me wish that you had continued to homeschool, just so you could keep them hidden. Who knows what he would do. Do you think he has enough power to prevent you from transferring?"

I sigh. "I don't know, Uri. My hope is that Dad wants us gone badly enough to keep Marcus from trying." My situation is without precedent. It has happened in other factions, but there has never been an Abnegation girl that had children before her choosing ceremony. Not until me.

We have to get out of here. _We have to._

**-oOo-**

**Four POV**

I switch my camera feed to the Upper Levels School doors. The other day, I saw Beatrice on screen for the first time in months, and I am hoping to catch another glimpse of her. It felt odd the few times I watched Uriah walk out of school without her. Maybe she has been doing some sort of volunteer job after school.

As I wait, I hear the control room door open and the sound of someone whistling.

"It's Eric," Zeke whispers from his station next to mine, "and he looks giddy." This can't be good. Eric's greatest joy in life is to antagonize Zeke and me. Mostly just because he hates Abnegation, but it only made things worse when I outranked him in our initiation.

As expected, Eric stops between Zeke and me.

"Special delivery!" he singsongs. "When I got the latest news on Abnegation, I thought you all would want to see it right away. You're a Prior, aren't you, _Ezekiel?"_

Eric pulls a chair between Zeke and me and leans back, resting the back of his head on his hands and his feet on the counter between our workstations. He wears a satisfied smirk so wide that it pulls on and widens the holes of his lip piercings. Refusing to look at Eric, Zeke stares, resolute and stone faced, at the video monitor in front of him.

Eric clears his throat and reads loudly. "_**Further Evidence of Moral Decay in Abnegation. **__The moral integrity of the head and second seats of the Council, Marcus Eaton and Andrew Prior, were called into question eight months ago with the exodus of their children from their homes in Abnegation when they transferred factions: Tobias Eaton and Ezekiel Prior to Dauntless, and Caleb Prior to Erudite. The upbringings of these children has been called into question, with particular evidence and speculation pertaining to the possible violent and abusive upbringing of Tobias Eaton." _

I just stare at him. This is nothing new. There have been several reports to this same effect over the past eight months, one even including quotes from Eric himself. I know the allegations are untrue of Andrew and I am sorry for their family, but Marcus deserves every word. I hate that my torment is out there for the whole city to judge, but the Dauntless have not seemed to connect Tobias Eaton with Four, thank God.

"_Shocking recent events," _Eric continues, "_further confirm problems in the home of Andrew Prior, second seat on the Council."_

I glance warily at Zeke. He looks as anxious as I feel. What could have happened?

"_Two months ago, on January 5, Andrew Prior's fifteen-year-old daughter, Beatrice Prior, was admitted to Norton Memorial Hospital in Erudite, where she gave birth to twins." _

Zeke gasps and his eyes meet mine. He is pale, but I suspect that there is no color in my face at all. _Birth? Twins? _My brain struggles to comprehend just what this means. Zeke tries to grab the paper from Eric's hand, but Eric swats him away and holds the paper just out of Zeke's reach.

"_Prior's adopted son, Uriah, and biological daughter, Beatrice, will participate in this year's Choosing Ceremony. Beatrice is the first Abnegation dependent to become an unwed mother in the history of the faction system. The paternity of these infants has remained undisclosed by their young mother, with the hospital staff legally barred from even revealing the last name of Prior's grandchildren._

"_Is not only Abnegation's leadership, but the leadership of our great city in the hands of a pair of morally bereft men? If they cannot effectively teach their own children and motivate them to keep the ways of their faction of birth, how can we trust them as leaders?"_

"Give me that, Eric!" Zeke finally roars. But this time, Eric has gotten what he wanted and doesn't try to stop Zeke from ripping the paper from his hands.

"That's okay, you can have that one." Eric punctuates his declaration with a dismissive wave of his hand. His pierced lips twist into an evil smirk. "I have extra copies in my office and at home."

I feel like I am going to be sick, dizzy as if I have been spinning in circles like we all used to do in the meadow on the outskirts of Abnegation.

I'm a father.

I'm a father, and a shitty one already; I left them.

I left _her._ Left her to who knows what kind of response from Abnegation, from the whole city, and if Marcus finds out it was me… fuck, I don't even know what will happen.

I get up and head for the door; I really think I am going to be sick. But then I hear Eric:

"So, _Ezekiel,_ you never told me your sister was a _slut_. You think she'll come here? Maybe I can have a little taste of the _Slutty Stiff._"

I don't even think. Before I know what I'm doing, my feet carry me back to Eric and my fist collides with his jaw. I know he didn't really expect me to care about Beatrice, he just saw an opportunity to get at Zeke.

But now I'm punching him and I can't stop.

Zeke pulls me off of him with the help of Austin, another control room worker on our shift. I don't know how Zeke had the self-control to stop me rather than join me, considering what Eric just said about his sister.

The look Zeke directs my way is menacing. Without taking his eyes off me, he addresses the room, "I think Four and I need to have a chat. We'll be taking a short break. You all can get on without us for ten minutes, right?" He walks out the door without waiting for a response.

I follow him, my stomach clenching in distress. I can take Zeke in any normal circumstance; I have never lost a fight. But he is still my closest friend… and I am pretty sure he just figured out that I am the one who put his sister in this position… who put his whole family in this position.

"What the fuck was that, Tobias?" Zeke demands. He is trying to stay calm, but I can see how much of a struggle it is. Of course it is. He just found out that his baby sister is an unwed mother at the age of fifteen, and she didn't tell him herself.

She didn't tell _me_ about it herself, either. Why didn't she tell me?

"I wasn't about to let him talk about Beatrice like that. She's not a _slut_, Zeke!"

"Yeah?" he says, looking at me intently. "How can I be sure about that? I mean, I obviously don't know my sister, because I would have sworn on my mother's life that she wouldn't do something like this! Do _you_ know anything about how this happened, _Tobias?_ Because I'm getting the impression that you know my sister quite a lot better than I do."

I stand there speechless. I may have only four fears, but in this moment, I am not brave enough to admit to my actions and probably ruin my friendship with Zeke forever.

Zeke huffs and shakes his head in disbelief. "Be a man, Four!" he yells. "Own up to your own goddamn mistakes! Because it looks like they're gonna be staring you in the face in a few months, won't they?!" In a few months… she will be here… _with my_ _children._ My children who I have never met, who she didn't even _tell_ me about! I turn and run to the bathroom, where I lose my lunch.

How could she do this? Why didn't she tell me?! I have two children… and I found out from a newspaper. Not just a newspaper, but from an article read aloud by _Eric_, of all people! And to top it all off… my best friend had to find out about my relationship with his sister in the same way. _Fuck!_

I quickly wash my face and rinse my mouth with water from the tap. When I come out of the public bathroom, the hallway is empty, so I go back to work. Zeke is at his station, watching the feed I was looking at earlier: the front of the school. It's now swarming with teenagers from all factions.

"Zeke," I say.

He doesn't even flinch, he doesn't look up at me, it's as if I am not even there.

"Zeke."

Nothing.

I sigh. "Zeke, I'm sorry. I didn't know she was―"

"Knocked up?" he says bitterly. "I can't believe you were―" he runs his hands through his curly hair. It has gotten long since we came to Dauntless. "Behind my back, Four! My little sister!" He runs his hands over his face and I think about running back to that bathroom to dry heave. "How long? How long were you seeing each other?"

I gulp and glance away. "A year."

Zeke shakes his head. "Just ― just don't talk to me any more, Four. Leave me alone."

I sigh, but I don't argue. I just sit down and watch the screen, which now shows Beatrice and Uriah waiting for the bus. A Candor kid grips her arm and leans in much too close, whispering something in Beatrice's ear. She recoils in a way that makes it obvious that the boy said something completely inappropriate, but he only tightens his grip ― so much that even with her distance from the camera, I can see her wince ― and yanks her toward him. I can't believe I brought all this down on her.

Uriah turns, a murderous expression on his face, and clocks the guy right in the jaw. The kid releases Beatrice's arm and stumbles backward. When the Candor boy tries to punch back and Beatrice jumps between them, receiving a fist to the gut, Zeke and I jump to our feet at the same time. We look at each other, the same worry and distress I am feeling reflected in his eyes, and when we look back Uriah is wailing on the kid. When the Candor kid is incapacitated ― he appears to be knocked out, actually ― Uriah speaks to Beatrice for a moment and only looks more concerned as they talk. Beatrice is still doubled over with tears streaming down her face. Uriah scoops her up in his arms and carries her back toward the school.

I collapse into my chair. "This is all my fault," I whisper. "I did this. It's all my fault."

Zeke looks me level in the eyes. "Yeah," he says. "It is."

**-oOo-**

I shuffle down the hallway of the old building in the factionless sector by feel and memory. The flashlight we have always kept by the door is missing. I guess that's a good sign, and probably should have tipped us off that the twins weren't here last time Zeke and I tried to stop by.

I slowly and carefully make my way down the stairs to the basement. As I near the door to the old training room, I know they are definitely here, because I can hear knives hitting the target, and the occasional clunk of one hitting the floor.

It took me a week to work up the nerve to come here. I mean, I desperately wanted to see Beatrice, and I wanted to see these babies, too. But at the same time I was so ashamed to have done this to her, to have left her alone like that, and terrified at the idea of being a father. Seeing them will make it all real.

And what if I don't like them? What if I see them and have no idea what to do with them, feel nothing at all for them?

I guess I won't know until I meet them.

I slowly and quietly push open the door to be greeted with the sight of Beatrice, poised to throw a knife. Her stance is good ― not perfect, but extremely good when you consider that she doesn't have any sort of instructor. I watch the fluid movement of her arm as she throws. Beautiful. I don't even watch the knife, I am too mesmerized by the sight of her finally so near me, after so many months apart.

I know I was upset with her, but don't care. Right now, I just want to grab hold of her and never let go.

The sound of the knife sinking into the board reminds me to look at the knife and target. Her knife is only about two centimeters right of center.

"Impressive," I say from the doorway. It comes out a lot louder than I meant it to and Beatrice whirls around, shocked, and stares at me for a long moment. A baby's cry from across the room drags my attention away from her until she tackles me a second later and I hug her tightly to me. Her feet aren't even on the ground.

I glance across the room, toward the crying, and see Uriah swaying back and forth with a tiny baby held against his chest.

But in my arms, Beatrice is sobbing too. It looks like Uriah's got things handled with the baby and I doubt I would be of much help. I do want to see them, but I want to see Beatrice most of all. Even if I am upset with her, I still have missed her so badly.

I pull back to look at her beautiful face and I can't wait another second to kiss her. I crash my lips against hers and pour eight months of loneliness and longing for her into the kiss. After a moment Tris pulls away and her face is turning beet red. She glances at Uriah.

"I'm so sorry, Tobias," she whispers. "Do you hate me?"

"I could never hate you," I respond truthfully. I look at Uriah again, and notice that the cries are now coming in stereo, and see Uriah leaning in to check on the other baby now, too.

"Shit, sorry, Uri!" Beatrice calls. She glances at me apologetically, runs over to her brother and takes the baby that has been crying longer. Beatrice is very small for a girl who will turn sixteen this month, but even in her arms this baby looks so tiny. She walks away from me, bouncing gently. I am not sure whether to look at the baby Uriah is taking care of or follow Beatrice. Then Beatrice glances back at me with an apologetic smile, and I follow her.

"She's a really fussy baby, but she is happier when we move around with her," Beatrice explains.

I nod, not that it would have ever occurred to me that a baby would care whether you were moving or sitting still with them. I guess that must be why people are always rocking babies. I don't know, I just never thought about it. I have never really been around a baby.

"What's her name?" I can't believe I don't even know my own kids' names. But I guess this is progress from a week or so ago, when I didn't even know I _had_ kids.

"Adeline," Beatrice says. It sounds musical, the way Beatrice says it. "And Uriah is taking care of her twin brother, Landon. I ― I hope you like the names I picked. Uriah helped. I would have really liked for you to help choose them. I didn't have any way to contact you."

"They were only born six months after I left. You must have known. But you didn't tell me. I'm sure we could have at least found a way for me not to miss their _birth_ if you'd said something."

She scowls at me. "I suspected before you left, yeah. But first of all, they were more than a month early. Common with twins, I guess. So I actually hadn't suspected for very long at all yet, and I hadn't been to the doctor. But even if I had been positive that I was expecting, what if I had told you? You never would have left and we would both be stuck in Abnegation under Marcus's thumb for the rest of our lives!" She stops pacing and turns to me, and Adeline cries louder again. But Beatrice keeps focused on me, though she sways back and forth in an effort to soothe the baby. She reaches her free hand out and cups my cheek with her palm. I automatically lean into it.

"It was the only way for us to have the life we've always wanted together, Tobias. Please understand."

I close my eyes and slowly nod.

"Ezekiel didn't want to come with you?" Her voice is too high and sounds tight. She's worried what his reaction was.

"Zeke and I haven't spoken since the day we read that Erudite report. I can't blame him. This is my fault."

"_Our_ fault," she corrects me. "We did this together, Tobias. It was as much my choice as it was yours."

I don't want to spend the short time I have with her arguing, so I shrug, put my arm around Beatrice, and we start walking again.

"Are you okay?" I ask her, suddenly remembering the last time I saw her on the screen in the control room. "I work in intelligence ― the control room. I was watching you waiting for the bus when that Candor…"

Beatrice sighs. "Yeah, I'm alright. They gave me some sort of shot to help stop the bleeding. My incision… well, never mind. I'm fine. Don't worry." She grimaces. "I'll be homeschooling again until the aptitude test, though. Mom says that Dad and Marcus don't want any more attention drawn to Abnegation." I wince just hearing her mention my father. But I don't want to think about him now Or ever. .But especially when I finally have a few minutes with Beatrice. This visit will end all too soon.

When we get back to Uriah, baby Adeline is quiet and Landon is happy chewing on his fist and looking over Uriah's shoulder.

"You should hold him, Tobias," Beatrice says gently. Uriah holds him out to me and helps me position my arms the right way. He is bigger than Adeline but still feels so light in my arms. My eyes scan his little face and I gasp. He looks like the baby version of me. A miniature, slightly flattened version of my hooked nose, deep-set dark blue eyes, my olive skin; his strong jaw, full lower lip, right down to the way his ears stick out. He smiles at me, showing me his gums, and I stroke his cheek with my thumb. As I do, he grabs hold of my index finger and holds onto me tightly.

A warm feeling starts at the center of my chest and spreads through me as I smile back at this little person. "He's… amazing," I say.

Uriah nods. "Yeah," he says with a little smile, "he really is. You should hold Addie, too." After passing Landon back to Uriah and carefully taking my daughter from Beatrice's arms, I take my time looking Adeline over, just as I did Landon.

Adeline feels much lighter than her brother. Beatrice managed to pass her to me without waking her, so her eyes are hidden behind closed lids. I admire the features she got from her mother: the straight nose, rounded chin, her wispy, straight blond hair. I smile as I study her tiny face and see her lips ― a tiny version of my own ― move as if she is suckling on something. I wonder if babies dream, and if they do, is she dreaming about food? That's my girl; one day I'll introduce her to Dauntless cake and then that will be what she dreams about eating.

"I can't believe that we made them," I whisper, my voice thick with emotion. I meet Beatrice's gaze and see that she has tears in her eyes too. I just met these little people, who I wasn't even sure I would like, and already my heart is ready to burst with love for them and I am overcome with a fierce need to protect them. I would do anything for them.


	8. Chapter 8

_**A/N: **__Is everyone staying safe and healthy? I hope so! COM should have an update within the next couple days, it's soooo close to ready, so keep an eye out for that!_

_Leave me a review and I will love you forever!_

* * *

**ABNEGATION HELLIONS**

**CHAPTER EIGHT**

_**Beatrice POV**_

I wake from the simulation to sweaty palms and a pang of guilt in my chest. I am lying in the chair in the mirrored room. When I tilt my head back, I see Tori, the Dauntless woman who administered my aptitude test, behind me. She pinches her lips together and removes electrodes from our heads. I wait for her to say something about the test — that it's over, or that I did well, although how could I do poorly on a test like this? — but she says nothing, just pulls the wires from my forehead.

I sit forward and wipe my palms off on my slacks. I had to have done something wrong, even if it only happened in my mind. Is that strange look on Tori's face because she doesn't know how to tell me what a terrible person I am? I wish she would just come out with it.

"That," she says, "was perplexing. Excuse me, I'll be right back."

Perplexing?

I curl up on the chair and bury my face in my knees. How can you fail a test you aren't allowed to prepare for? I didn't even think it mattered what I received on this test, because I know where I am going tomorrow: I am going to Dauntless, where I can be with Tobias ― where we can be a family.

As the moments pass, I get more nervous. What if they tell me that I'm not cut out for any faction? I would have to live on the streets, with the factionless. I can't do that. To live factionless is not just to live in poverty and discomfort; it is to live divorced from society, separated from the most important thing in life: community. Well, the second most important thing in my life, the first being with Tobias and my family. My brothers and I have already ripped our family apart, but I would still have Ezekiel and Uriah in Dauntless.

My mother told me once that we can't survive alone, but even if we could, we wouldn't want to. Without a faction, we have no purpose and no reason to live. But what I need more than a faction is Tobias… and if I can't fit into Dauntless, I lose him, too.

If I had to be factionless, would he leave Dauntless to be with me? Could I even ask him to do that?

I wonder if there are families in the factionless. Everything I have grown up learning about our society, and those outcast from it, would suggest not… but for the first time, I question that belief. Why wouldn't there be? They are people, like the rest of us. Why wouldn't they fall in love, start families, create community? Maybe it's just wishful thinking, delusions borne out of fear.

I shake my head. I can't think like this. I have to stay calm.

Finally the door opens, and Tori walks back in. I hold my breath.

"Sorry to worry you," Tori says. Something is still wrong; she looks tense and pale.

"Your results were inconclusive," she says. "How the test is meant to work is that each stage of the simulation eliminates one or more factions, but your test only ruled out two: Candor and Amity."

I don't understand. How is this possible? "Only two?" I ask. My mouth is dry and it makes it hard to speak.

Tori goes on to explain how she ruled out Amity and Candor, and which choices I made that aligned me with the other factions. The longer she speaks, the more confused I become, and finally I can't stand it any more.

"Wait," I interrupt her. "So you have no idea what my aptitude is?"

"Yes and no. My conclusion," she explains, "is that you display equal aptitude for Abnegation, Dauntless, and Erudite. People who get this kind of result are..." She looks over her shoulder like she expects someone to appear behind her. "...are called ..._Divergent_." She says the last word so quietly that I almost don't hear it, and her tense, worried look returns. She walks around the side of the chair and leans in close to me.

"Beatrice," she says, "under no circumstances should you share that information with anyone. This is very important."

"We aren't supposed to share our results." I nod. "I know that."

"No." Tori kneels next to the chair now and places her arms on the armrest. Our faces are inches apart. "This is different. I don't mean you shouldn't share them now; I mean you should never share them with anyone, ever, no matter what happens. Divergence is extremely dangerous. You understand?"

I don't understand — how could inconclusive test results be dangerous? — but I still nod. I don't want to share my test results with anyone anyway. Except Uriah. No matter what she says, I can trust my twin brother.

"Okay." I peel my hands from the arms of the chair and stand. I feel unsteady.

"I suggest," Tori says, "that you go home. You have a lot of thinking to do, and waiting with the others may not benefit you. I manually entered your results as Abnegation."

"You already did? I'm going to Dauntless."

Tori raises an eyebrow. "Dauntless is a dangerous choice for someone like you, Beatrice. You should take some time to think."

I shake my head. "No, I don't need to think about it. I have always planned to go to Dauntless, and I have someone waiting for me there. I would have gone with or without the aptitude. I won't change my mind about this."

Tori purses her lips and raises her hands as if in surrender. "Alright, Beatrice. I'll see you in Dauntless."

I go back to the cafeteria as if nothing strange has happened and take a seat next to Uriah, who is chewing on his bottom lip. Tori calls his name next, and I am left on my own to wait. I sit by Susan and Robert. Like good Abnegation, they sit patiently and silently, drawing no attention to themselves.

Uriah and I have never really fit in Abnegation, but we always have one another, so I had nearly forgotten how boring it can be. I am not used to being with good Abnegation dependants like the Blacks; this is the first time I have been back to school since the day that Candor boy punched me in the gut. Uriah had to take me to the doctor afterward, but luckily no major damage was done to my newly healed incision. Still, it was enough to convince me that homeschooling was the best choice for the few remaining months before my Choosing Ceremony.

As determined as I was minutes ago, now I have begun to feel guilty. Is transferring the best choice for the twins? If I am divergent, will they be, too? Tori said that Dauntless was dangerous for people like me. Am I making a reckless decision? Is it what is best for my children?

On the other hand, would they ever be safe if I stayed in Abnegation, within Marcus's reach?

Is there a right choice at all?

I haven't come up with any answers yet when Uriah sits down next to me, looking pale. "Tori suggested that I go home," I tell him. "The uh… the serum made me sick. Besides, I don't want to wait around for a repeat of what happened the last time I came to school. You coming with me?"

Uriah nods quickly. "Yeah… I don't feel so well either. Let's go home and get the twins. There are no more classes today. Not that you've been to any of them in a while, anyway," he teases. I mock glare in response.

Mom took the twins to work with her today so I could go to the aptitude test along with Uriah. It is required that all sixteen-year-olds be there, so of course I had to go, but it was nice to leave them with Mom rather than someone I don't know well and trust. I guess I had better get over that, though, as I'm sure I won't be able to be with them all the time once we get to Dauntless… tomorrow.

We enter Abnegation Headquarters, where Mom works as the head volunteer coordinator. We aren't even all the way in the door and I can already hear Adeline crying. I groan. She is just a baby and something must bother her, but I hope she hasn't been like this the whole time. It must have been very difficult for Mom to get any work done today.

Uriah, a few steps ahead of me, opens the door to Mom's office and stops so quickly that I walk into him. "Uriah, what the—" the look on his face as he glances back at me stops me mid-sentence. It's a look of shock, fear and anger. I push past him into the room and freeze, my jaw dropped for just a moment before rushing to my child… who is in her grandfather's arms. It may as well be the Devil himself holding my baby girl.

Adeline is bright red from screaming. Her face is all scrunched up and her arms flail. I snatch her from his hands. "It's okay, baby, you're okay. Mommy's here," I coo, holding Adeline against my shoulder and pacing around Mom's small office. Mom still looks distressed; she had been trying to get Marcus to give her back, but had not had the nerve to just grab Adeline away like I did. Uriah hurries across the room to pull Landon out of the playpen he is laying in before Marcus can get his hands on my son, as well.

"Did he hurt you?" I worry to my daughter.

Mom gasps. "Oh, no, of course he didn't _hurt_ her, Beatrice! I don't know how you could suggest such a thing of Marcus! I think she was just afraid because she doesn't know him, dear."

"Well, then, he should have given her back to you as soon as she was so upset!" I seethe, glaring at Mom. She has read the articles, she knows what he is accused of. She doesn't know it's true, of course, but I do.

I look at Marcus with my eyes full of anger, but it soon gives way to fear. I can see it on the sinister look on his face. _He knows._

"That's alright, I'll have plenty of other opportunities to see them, won't I?" he says with a false smile. "You wouldn't dream of taking them away from such a wonderful place as Abnegation, would you, Beatrice?" His words and tone do not give away any ill will, but his eyes… his eyes. It's like looking into black pits instead of the gorgeous blue this man passed down to his son, and his grandchildren. In that moment, I think he might actually _be_ the devil.

After the first time we encountered Marcus while walking home with the twins, Uriah and I resolved to research the city's laws regarding choosing a faction at the age of sixteen. Obtaining the law books from Abnegation Headquarters, where Marcus and both my parents work, felt sneaky and dangerous, like we were covert operatives on a secret mission. I was almost disappointed at how easy it was in the end. We learned that the only thing that could prevent me from transferring with my children was imprisonment for a serious crime. Tomorrow, my babies and I will be free of this place, assuming that I can make it through the next day without any serious incident.

"Of course not, Marcus," I lie. "I think my brother and I should get these little ones home so that our mother can get back to work. Thank you again, Mom, for taking care of them today."

"It was my pleasure, Beatrice," she says formally. "I'll be home in time for dinner." I nod and quickly exit the office, Uriah trailing after me.

"I'll come back for the play yard later, Mom," I hear Uriah assure her; she responds telling him that there is no need, that we should be thinking of our choice and she can carry it with no trouble at the end of the day.

**-oOo-**

Dad works late tonight. He is rarely home for dinner any more; on the rare occasion that I see him, the atmosphere is tense. I suspect that will change as soon as the twins and I are out of his hair (and his life). He was a great dad when I was growing up, I know he doesn't simply hate children… just me, I suppose.

Landon bangs his palm on the empty high chair tray and babbles at us as we all take our seats around the table. I fed him earlier, but I put him in the high chair for meals because he just likes to be with us. Adeline is, for once, asleep.

As soon as we have finished blessing the meal, Mom drops Uriah's and my hands and clasps hers together. "Well," she says. "Since it is just the three of us tonight— well, the four of us—" She waves and smiles at Landon, who answers with a toothless grin. "—I wanted to talk with you both about the aptitude tests."

Uriah and I glance nervously at each other, both tensing. We discussed our tests as soon as we got home, despite Tori's warnings. I knew how hurt Uriah had been over the secrets I kept from him a year ago, and I know with absolute certainty that I can trust my brother. Our divergence is now another way we are alike, a secret we share.

"But we're not supposed to tell anyone about our tests," Uriah protests nervously.

Mom raises an eyebrow. "My friend Erin told me that two students — with the same administrator, one after another, no less — got sick. _You two_ arrived a bit early to pick up the twins." She smiles teasingly. "Besides, I'm your mother. You can't fool me. You have already discussed it with one another."

"Why does it matter what the test said?" I argue. "You know we decided where we would go years ago. The test doesn't change anything."

Mom sighs. "I know, Beatrice, and I don't expect it to. What I wanted to talk to you about was the _reason_ you left early, the reason your results were manually entered. You are both divergent, aren't you?"

Uriah and I look at each other, communicating with our eyes, then begin nodding simultaneously.

"How do you know about divergents?" I ask slowly. "And what are they? What are _we_?"

"I know about them because I am one," Mom says evenly. "So was Uriah's mother. Divergence seems to be genetic. For most people, it is easy to learn one pattern of thought and stick to it, but divergents… our minds move in a dozen different directions. We cannot be confined to one dominant trait, one belief, to one way of thinking. We cannot be just one thing, and we cannot be controlled. That scares our leaders, and if they find you, they will kill you.

"Dauntless is a dangerous choice. I love you both, no matter what. You know that. And I want to make sure you and my grandchildren are as safe as possible, so listen carefully."

**-oOo-**

I am shocked when my father accompanies us to the choosing ceremony. He and Mom walk Uriah and me to our place in the line of sixteen year olds, arranged in alphabetical order, around the perimeter of the large room in the Hub. Mom carries Landon while I carry Adeline. She gives my son one last kiss before handing him to Uriah, then reaches out for Adeline. She holds her granddaughter to her chest and rests her lips in Adeline's hair. Mom's eyes are closed but I can see the tears collecting in the corners of her eyes.

When I glance at my father, he is studying Landon's face for probably the first time ever. He reaches out and strokes the baby's face once with his thumb, so tenderly, much like he used to do to me when I was young. He then pulls Uriah in for a careful hug, as the baby is between them. Mom hands Adeline back to me after giving her one more kiss on the forehead and whispering an "I love you," and then she hugs me. "Remember that I love you, no matter what," she whispers in my ear, "and be careful and safe."

Then Mom and Dad switch places. Dad now studies Adeline's petite little face; she is quite a bit smaller than her brother, and pixie-like. "Her hair is exactly like yours was," he says. I am surprised to see that he looks a little misty. He hesitantly kisses the crown of Adeline's head, then kisses my cheek. "No matter how angry I am, Beatrice, I still love you. I hope you know that." Then he turns and walks away, and Mom trails behind him with a sad smile.

I watch as Marcus catches Dad's attention. He separates from Mom, approaching Marcus while Mom finds a seat in the Abnegation section of the audience. The two men speak for a moment, looking at me and Uriah the whole time, then Dad strides across the large room to us. Wow, Dad is speaking to me twice in one day. This is certainly unexpected… though, I know it is only because of whatever Marcus said to him.

"Beatrice," Dad says, narrowing his eyes at me, then glancing at the twins. "It's time for you to tell me who their father is. Marcus needs their surname for city records."

I purse my lips and glance at Marcus. He is busy preparing for the ceremony, but his eyes frequently dart my way and bore into me.

"Can you wait to tell him after the ceremony? I don't want it announced during the Choosing." Dad sighs in annoyance but nods. "Alright. Their surname is Eaton."

Dad's expression hardens. "I should have listened to Marcus all those years," he grouses. "He was right, that boy was bad news. Troubled. You need to stay in Abnegation, Beatrice. Tobias is no good."

Now it is my turn to glare. "You don't know what you are talking about, Dad. This is _my_ life, these are _my_ children, and this is _my_ choice. I am not a child any more. This isn't up to you. I love you, but I have to choose for me, and for my babies."

Dad's face turns red in anger and he opens his mouth to speak, then closes it, sealing his lips in a thin, straight line, and just glares at me. He shakes his head and walks away without another word.

Uriah's free hand squeezes my bicep. "Good job, sis."

I nod and look at the floor. I hadn't thought it possible to further damage my relationship with my father. Now, I think it is far beyond repair.

**-oOo-**

The names are read in reverse alphabetical order, so Uriah was called just ahead of me. After the whoops and cheers of the Dauntless (and the murmurs of dissent from the Abnegation section of the audience) quiet down, Marcus calls me. "Beatrice Prior," his voice booms. Abnegation is hosting this year, so Marcus Eaton is the master of ceremony. I carry one twin in each arm. Marcus holds out the knife, but how am I supposed to handle this knife with a baby in each hand? Handing either of them to Marcus is not an option that I will be considering.

Uriah sees the dilemma and rushes back onto the stage, causing a bit of rabble from all the factions. He takes Adeline from me — probably because she's the one most likely to get upset about something, flail around, and cut herself on the knife. They stand directly to my right, so close Uriah and I are nearly touching. I cringe as I prepare for what I am about to do.

"Did you disclose their surname to your father?" Marcus asks. I glare, but nod.

"He will share that with you after the ceremony," I say quietly. I almost wish I could be here to see Marcus's face when his suspicions are confirmed. I return my focus to my task, and press the knife hard into my hand ― a little too hard probably, thanks to Marcus's presence causing me to become agitated. Then — and I swear it physically hurts to do this to my child — I slice Landon's palm and hand the knife to Uriah, who slices Adeline's. She will probably scream for the entire rest of the ceremony now.

Both babies scream as Uriah and I take each of their balled fists and hold them, along with my own, over the burning Dauntless coals. Rage swirls in Marcus's eyes, and I just glare at him, but inside, panic bubbles up. Even without confirmation, Marcus knows that these children are his blood. Looking at Landon, how could he not?

The vengeful look in Marcus's eyes as my blood spilled over the burning Dauntless coals haunts me. But we will be safe in Dauntless. We have to be safe in Dauntless. Besides, I know how to defend myself, and Dauntless will teach me to be even better.

After a Dauntless-born girl with a shaved head chooses her home faction, Uriah and I are approached by a Dauntless girl with shoulder length brown hair and a pierced lip. "Hey, I'm Shauna," she whispers. I sigh in relief and smile. She reaches out and I awkwardly shake her hand. While not something performed in Abnegation, handshakes are the typical Dauntless greeting. Uriah and I have practiced a few times, but I can't say that I have become very comfortable with the gesture yet.

Tobias has only met us at the training room two more times since he found us there nearly four months ago; visiting is an ordeal, as apparently Dauntless has a lot of cameras and each time he sneaks out to meet me, he risks accusations of disloyalty to his chosen faction. The last visit was just a week ago, and he didn't have much time; mostly, we just discussed the logistics of initiation. It seems that Tobias will be our initiation instructor. We have to pretend not to know one another, but he did set things up for me with the twins. Though he refused to offer any details, his biggest concern was getting them safely into the Dauntless compound. That is why Shauna is here now. I hate to hand over my babies to someone I don't know, but Tobias trusts her. He even says she is Ezekiel's girlfriend. _Zeke_, I remind myself, _he's called Zeke now._ The name is a slightly more mature-sounding version of Zee, the nickname Uriah and I have occasionally used for him since we were toddlers.

Tobias also warned me that people in Dauntless don't know his true identity, so Uriah and I are to call him by his nickname, Four. Only when we are alone may I call him Tobias. Uriah and I have been talking about Ezekiel and Tobias, using their nicknames all week to practice, silly as it sounds.

Zeke has not been over to see us like Four has, and I have to admit that I am hurt. But I can only assume that he is angry with me—not only for managing to get pregnant a year before my choosing ceremony, but in particular for all the secrets I have kept. I can't blame him, but I do hope that he is ready to put all that aside when we arrive to Dauntless today. I miss my brother desperately.

I hand over the diaper bag to Shauna first, then Landon, and Uriah hands off Adeline. I give each of my babies a kiss on the forehead and look at Shauna sternly. "Look, I know you're my brother's girlfriend, and that you're doing us a favor and all… but I need you to know that if anything happens to my children, you will regret it."

"Don't worry, Mama Bear," she says with a kind smile, "I'll keep them safe. Besides, Zeke would kill me if I didn't."

I smile in relief, knowing that even if he's mad, Zeke still cares — not only for me, but for his niece and nephew whom he has not even met yet. Tobias said Zeke had wanted to come with him to meet us last week, but that they ultimately decided he would stay in the control room to be sure no one saw Tobias on the cameras as he made his way to the factionless sector.

"Okay," I say, still nervous. "Well, there's a stroller just outside the doors of the Hub. You're taking the bus, right?"

"Yep, no way I can jump a train with two infants. Seriously, don't worry, Beatrice. I'll take them right to their Uncle Zeke and we'll meet you at the initiates entrance in Dauntless soon. Okay?"

"Okay," I say, my voice quiet and tight.

My eyes burn with tears as this perfect stranger walks away with both of my children, and Uriah grabs my hand to comfort me. _I'll see them again in just a couple of hours,_ I remind myself. _Tobias wouldn't put them in danger._


	9. Chapter 9

**ABNEGATION HELLIONS**

**CHAPTER NINE**

**Beatrice POV**

When the ceremony ends, the Dauntless jump to action, hooting and hollering and stomping as they run down the twenty flights of stairs and out of the doors of the Hub, making as much commotion as possible. Once we're out of the building, I keep Uriah in my peripheral vision, not wanting to be separated from him as we run in the pack of black-clothed Dauntless.

We race through the streets until we climb after the Dauntless up to a train platform. We stop to catch our breath ― though the other transfers, dressed in their Erudite blue and Candor black and white, look much more winded than Uriah and I are ― before the train is upon us and we are sprinting with the other Dauntless once again. Uriah and I skillfully and easily swing ourselves into the train car after a few Dauntless-born. I turn and reach out my hand to a Candor girl, helping her in after me. She is tall and pretty, with mocha skin and short, shiny black hair.

"Thanks," the Candor girl says as she follows me to join Uriah farther back in the car. Uriah and I sit against the wall, and the girl follows our lead. "I'm Christina."

She offers her hand and I shake it, thankful that Uriah and I thought to practice the greeting. "I'm Tris," I tell her, "and this is my brother, Uriah." I decided last night that I wanted a new name here in my new life, just like Tobias and Ezekiel did. I choose my nickname, Tris, because I still am the same girl I always was in those stolen moments I was allowed to be myself, away from the stifling rules of Abnegation, but I no longer want to be _Beatrice_, the Abnegation failure who seemingly ruined everything for everyone. I can remake myself here, but I still have my brothers and Tobias, I am still _me_.

"Tris… Beatrice?" a Dauntless-born girl with light brown hair and a kind smile cuts in. I raise my eyebrows and nod. "Sorry for interrupting… when you said Uriah I knew you must be the twins that Zeke has mentioned. I'm Marlene."

"You know our brother?" Uriah asks excitedly.

"Yeah!" Marlene says brightly. "He's dating Shauna, Lynn's sister." Marlene jerks a thumb at the Dauntless-born next to her, a bored-looking girl with a shaved head.

"Hey," Lynn says indifferently, but something about her tone makes it clear that she isn't interested in chatting with us. Okay, then.

"None of you look much alike," Marlene says, wearing a puzzled look on her face.

Uriah shrugs. "Resemblance or not, Eh…" he pauses when he catches himself using our brother's given name "...Zeke is our brother. So, you hang out with him much?"

"Sometimes," Marlene says. "Lynn and I usually go when he has parties and stuff."

Uriah smiles. "Good, then I guess I'll see more of you," he flirts.

Marlene gives an equally flirty smile back. "Looking forward to it. I'll save you a dance."

Uri smiles almost shyly and blushes just a little. I roll my eyes. These two seem to be either a great match or a terrible one ― it's hard to tell if the ways in which they seem to be similar would be a good thing or bad.

Next to me, Christina has started to chat with an Erudite transfer ― a boy with shaggy blond hair. I remember seeing him as we left the Choosing Room and smile to myself as I recall how terrified he looked.

"It's time to jump," Lynn says impatiently.

When I near the train car doors, I am shocked at what I see. There is no platform here; no, the train tracks hug a seven-story building, and we have to jump onto its roof. I use the term "hug" loosely; there is a significant gap between the two.

Marlene and Lynn leap out the door. The Erudite, once again, looks horrified. Uriah nudges me. "See you there, pansycake!" he calls and takes a running leap onto the roof.

Christina grabs my hand. "I need you to drag me."

I laugh. "Okay, on three!" We count down and together, we run and jump. Christina tumbles to her knees and nearly pulls me down with her, but with all the jumping on and off trains Uriah and I have done, I stick the landing and manage to stay upright. I almost wonder if I should have gone for a tuck-and-roll landing instead as pain shoots up my shins at the abrupt impact.

Nearby, a Dauntless girl wails as she reaches over the ledge. A Dauntless boy tries to calm her down and lead her away from the ledge; looking over for a brief moment I see a girl lying on the sidewalk, seven stories down, her hair fanned out around her and limbs bent at unnatural angles. I close my eyes and count to three, giving myself a moment to feel the impact of what I just saw, then I turn and walk away from the ledge. I cannot help that girl now, so I need to move on and focus on becoming Dauntless.

"Nice landing," Uriah grins. "Ready for this? Whatever it is that comes next, that is?"

"God, yes," I enthuse. I don't know what they will make us do now, and I do not know how we get into Dauntless from this rooftop, but I am ready for anything. I just want to see Tobias and Zeke, and see with my own eyes that my babies made it here safely.

"Listen up! My name is Max! I am one of the leaders of your new faction!" shouts a man at the other end of the roof. He is older than the others, with deep creases in his dark skin and gray hair at his temples, and I recognize him; he was the Dauntless leader that presided over last year's Choosing Ceremony. He stands on the ledge like it is a sidewalk. Like someone didn't just fall to her death from it. "Several stories below us is the members' entrance to our compound. If you can't muster the will to jump off, you don't belong here. Our initiates have the privilege of going first."

"You want us to jump off a _ledge_?" says an Erudite girl. She is a few inches taller than me with mousy brown hair and big lips.

Max looks amused. "Yes."

"Is there water at the bottom or something?" asks the Erudite boy Christina was talking to on the train.

Max smirks. "Who knows?"

I look around at the other initiates and spot the Candor boy who attacked me after school a few months ago. He picks at his cuticles, trying to look casual. Not only will Tobias be waiting for me inside the compound, but this is my chance to show up that Candor jerk.

"I'll do it," I say in a strong, clear voice. The crowd of initiates gapes at me. All but Uriah; he just smirks.

I walk confidently toward the ledge ― or at least, I hope I _appear_ confident. Inside I am kind of freaking out. But I know this is a scare tactic and I will land safely at the bottom. They wouldn't kill us all before we even make it into the compound, and Tobias would have warned me if I were in danger.

"Go Tris," Uriah shouts. His hands are cupped on either side of his mouth, making his voice carry even farther.

"Bet she'll chicken out," the Candor jerk sneers.

I reach the ledge and quickly unbutton my loose Abnegation coat, then I ball it up and throw it at Candor's chest. I smirk at his shocked face. Beneath it, I wear a gray t-shirt, tighter than anything I have worn in public previously, and gray leggings. I make eye contact with Max and give him a small nod.

I don't think. I just bend my knees and jump.

The sensation of free falling is unsettling and incredible. I can't hear a thing over the air howling past my ears and my heart pounds with adrenaline. The hole surrounds me and I drop into darkness.

The falling sensation stops abruptly when I hit something so hard that it knocks the wind out of me. Whatever I landed on is firm but flexible, giving way beneath my body before pulling taught again.

My fingers grip rope and I realize that I have landed in a net. There is a net at the bottom of the hole. I look up at the sky through the opening above me, cover my face with my hands, and laugh. That was actually really fun, a great welcome into Dauntless.

Hands reach out of the darkness and I grab the nearest one ― one that I recognize by its very long fingers. He pulls me off the net and catches me when I nearly fall. With my feet on solid ground, I look up at his face.

Tobias.

I try to suppress my grin. The corners of his lips twitch.

"Can't believe it," says a girl behind him, placing a hand on Tobias's shoulder. She has dark, purple-streaked hair and three rings through her right eyebrow. I want her hand off his shoulder and it takes everything in me not to smack it off of him. She smirks at me. "A Stiff, first to jump? Unheard of."

"There's a reason why she left them, Lauren," Tobias says, side stepping away from her. He turns to me. "What's your name?"

"Tris," I say confidently with a half-smile. Tobias keeps his expression neutral but smiles at me with his eyes.

"Tris," Lauren repeats. "Make the announcement, Four."

"First jumper, Tris!" he yells to the crowd, and they stomp feet and cheer. Tobias guides me away from the net with a hand on the small of my back. "Welcome to Dauntless, Tris," he says in my ear.

A high-pitched scream crescendos before another mass of gray lands in the net, and everyone laughs. I shake my head and laugh at my twin. "Who's the pansycake now, Uriah?" I call out in the direction of the net as I start down the steps, and I hear Four snort.

The ground is ten feet below the platform. I spot the group of people I am looking for just before I make it to the bottom. A few yards away from the stairs stands Shauna holding Adeline ― who is even asleep! ― and next to her, Zeke has Landon in his arms. Landon giggles as his uncle tickles his stomach. Zeke sees me coming down the steps and quickly transfers Landon back to Shauna's free arm.

"Zee!" I squeal and launch myself toward him. He catches me and engulfs me in a bear hug.

"Beatrice!" After we hug for a moment I step back and look at my brother. He is about an inch taller than when I last saw him, still much shorter than Uriah. But his hair is by far the longest I have ever seen it before, and the muscles in his arms and torso are clearly more defined through his snug black shirt. Uriah, having now descended the stairs as well, takes his turn hugging our big brother. I take Landon from Shauna and let her continue holding Adeline, not wanting to wake my sweet but perpetually cranky girl.

"You should have come to see us," Uriah pouts at Zeke after he pulls back. "I know you could have managed it."

Zeke frowns sheepishly. "I'm sorry, guys. I was mad." But then he grins. "But who could stay mad after seeing these little angels, huh?"

Uriah chuckles. "You haven't spent much time with Adeline if you're calling them 'little angels.' Landon, though, is an easy, happy little guy. Adeline is always crabby."

"At least it wasn't just me," Shauna interjects. "I thought maybe the kid just hated me!"

Christina approaches us and I greet her with a smile. Adeline stirs and begins to whine, and Uriah quickly takes her from Shauna and holds her upright against his chest the way that she likes and bounces while keeping his feet in place.

"So? I was told that you'd help me take care of everything we need for these guys?" I ask Zeke.

"Yep," Zeke replies. "I'll be the best uncle you ever saw." Uriah scoffs, and I laugh. He can try, but I don't think Zeke will ever beat out their Uncle Uriah. The twins are about as attached to him as they are to me. I imagine it will be hard on them when I move into an apartment on my own or with Tobias. I hope that Tobias will want us to live with him, anyway. I am not sure why we have not discussed that.

"Oh my gosh, who are these cuties?!" Christina shrieks.

"They're mine," I admit, smiling.

"Tris… Beatrice Prior," Christina says, realization striking her.

"Ugh, I see my reputation precedes me," I grumble.

Christina jumps to reassure me. "No, no, no! I recognize your name but I wasn't judging you, I promise. _And, _your babies are adorable." Adeline lets out a whimper and Uriah shushes her.

"Hey, Tris, you have a bottle for her?" Uriah interrupts. "I think she's hungry." I grab the bag from Shauna and pull a bottle from a side pocket, and hand it to Uriah. Then I pull another out of the other side pocket and reposition Landon.

"Can I?" Asks Zeke hopefully. He smiles down at Landon as he holds the bottle for him to drink. "So, how's Mom and Dad? How'd they take the news?"

"Mom has been good," I say. I feel like there's a rock in my stomach at the thought of having left Mom today, and just thinking of my dad at all. Our home has been tense ever since I announced my pregnancy, and especially since the twins were born. I hope that things can go back to normal between Mom and Dad now that the babies and I are out of the picture. I can see by Uriah's expression that he feels the same way. "She has been her kind, supportive self. Same volunteer projects, same job."

"And Dad?" Zeke pushes. Uriah sighs.

"Dad hasn't spoken to me in ten months," I inform him. "Not since the day I told him I was pregnant. I rarely saw him anymore, anyway. He was always working late."

"He spoke to you today," Uriah protests.

"Yeah, that's true. He did say three whole sentences to me today." I roll my eyes. But then I feel guilty for it. "It was nice, though. Hearing him speak to me again… knowing that he still loves me. Until the end there." Zeke raises his eyebrows and I shake my head. This is not the time or the place to dredge up Dad's comments about Tobias.

"You couldn't have seriously doubted that he loved you, Bea. You―" Zeke begins but he is interrupted by Tobias. I had not even noticed until now that most of the Dauntless had cleared out of the tunnel.

"Alright, initiates!" Tobias bellows. He gestures for us all to follow him and Lauren, the girl from the net.

"Give Adeline to Shauna, Uriah. We'll meet you at the dining hall." Uriah carefully hands my daughter to our new friend Shauna and I give Zeke the diaper bag. It feels so good to see him again. I have missed my big brother.

We leave Zeke behind and walk down dark hallways. The floor seems to slope downward, taking me deeper and deeper below the earth's surface. We stop abruptly and I almost bump into whoever is in front of me, but Uriah pulls me back. It is so dark that I cannot see the faces of the people around me.

Lauren says something and leads the Dauntless-born away. Looking around, I see that there are ten of us remaining: five Candor, three Erudite, and two Abnegation. Tobias finally speaks. "I usually work in the control room, but for the next month I will be your instructor. My name is Four."

"Four? Like the number?" Christina scoffs.

Tobias glares at her. "Yes. Is there a problem?"

"No," Christina says. Christina really needs to shut up. Tobias told me how he got that nickname ― by breaking Dauntless records, having the fewest fears. He ranked first. I don't think he likes being challenged.

But when we get to what Tobias tells us is called "The Pit," Christina does it again. "The Pit? Clever name," she says sarcastically.

I stomp on her toes to warn her to cut it out, but Tobias is already stalking up to her. He folds his arms and looks down at her. His stance and the cold expression on his face- one I don't even recognize on him- instantly have her terrified. "What's your name?" he asks in a low, quiet voice.

"Christina," she squeaks.

"Well, Christina," he says coldly, "the first lesson you will learn from me is to keep… your mouth… _shut_. Got that?"

Gulping, Christina nods and Tobias returns to the front of the group. "What a jerk," Christina mutters.

I instantly feel defensive. Just as I open my mouth Uriah cuts me off. He probably guessed that I was about to react a little too strongly. "He's our instructor, Christina," Uriah says quietly. "This is Dauntless, not Candor. We are soldiers, and he is our superior."

Christina lowers her eyes and nods. Uriah got his point across. I meet Uriah's eyes in silent thanks.

The Pit is aptly named. It is literally a huge pit in the ground, miles long, with places carved into the walls for eating and shopping and other such things. After giving us a moment to take our surroundings in, Tobias takes us to what he calls the Chasm. It is an underground river that flows stories below us. On one side of where Tobias stands, the water is calm and placid, shiny and smooth. To his other side, the river is a mess of white water as it rushes over the rocks. I look over the edge and watch the water crash against the rock walls of the ravine.

"The Chasm represents the fine line between bravery and idiocy," Tobias yells. "A daredevil jump off this ledge will end your life. It has happened before and it will happen again. You've-"

I don't hear what he says next because I feel a hard shove to my shoulder, and suddenly there is no gravity, and then I am too busy clawing at the simple metal railing on one side of the chasm. I look up, gasping in shock and fear, to see the Candor jerk who I have since learned is called Peter, smiling at me evilly. He pushed me!

"C'mon, _slut,_ prove you belong here," Peter sneers. He starts to pry my fingers from the bar, but then he abruptly crumples to the floor. Uri's hands wrap around my wrists and he pulls me back onto the path while Christina and a big Candor boy flutter around uselessly at his sides. I look back to where Peter is sprawled on the path to see Tobias standing over him with one foot on his chest. A bruise is already forming on Peter's jaw.

"You ever pull a stunt like that again, and I will make sure you find yourself factionless. Am I clear?" If I thought Tobias seemed scary when he put Christina in her place, I realize now that what we saw before was a very tame version of Four. He looks absolutely murderous, and Peter looks like he's going to shit himself. Good, I hope he does. He deserves the humiliation.

When Tobias looks up at me I can see the fear in his eyes still from my fall. He leaves Peter where he stands and steps closer to me, still looking intently into my eyes. "Are you okay, Tris?" he asks quietly, soothingly.

I nod. I clear my throat before speaking, afraid that my voice would otherwise come out timid and scratchy, and I do not want to sound weak or afraid. I can't. Not here, not among my fellow initiates, the people I am competing with to make it into Dauntless. "I'm fine. Thank you."

Tobias nods and we all leave the Chasm and follow him to the dining hall. Uriah's arm never leaves my shoulders. Uriah and I are walking right behind him, flanked by Christina and the big Candor boy, who I learn is named Al. Being so near Tobias is comforting. I always feel safer when he is near me.

"Peter is such a jerk," Christina grumbles. "Always has been, but I didn't expect _that_ from him."

"He attacked her after school when she tried to come back after the twins were born," Uriah confides, going on to explain about the fight that led me to continue homeschooling. Tobias clenches his jaw and he glances to Peter at the back of the group with pure hatred in his eyes.

Tobias pushes open the doors to the dining hall. We follow him in and are greeted by more stomping and pounding and whooping. The Dauntless sure are loud, I think. But I like it. Their enthusiasm brings a smile to my face.

"I'll show you where Zeke and I usually sit," Tobias says with a glance back at me and Uriah.

Christina gives me a questioning look. "He's friends with my brother," I explain. She nods.

Uriah sits down next to Zeke before I get a chance to, so I sit across from him after reaching across the table to take Adeline from Shauna, who smiles at me. Tobias sits to my left and Christina to my right; when I look her way, I notice that we seem to have a whole entourage.

"I'm sorry," I say to the boy with the shaggy blond hair, "I met Al over there, but I never got your name."

"Will," he says, reaching out and shaking my hand. Still feels awkward. We sit down and I answer the usual questions about the babies. Zeke explains all the strange foods at the table, which shocks our new friends that transferred from Candor; apparently it's, like, a crime or something not to have experienced a hamburger. Tobias can hardly contain his smile as Zeke howls at my sarcastic and snarky responses.

Uriah and I are reminiscing with Zeke about some of our truth or dare games when the entire dining hall goes silent. The entire faction seems to be watching a guy with greasy hair and a face full of piercings walk through the dining hall.

"Who's that?" Christina asks.

"Eric," Tobias answers. "He's a Dauntless leader."

"But he's so young!"

"Age doesn't matter here," Zeke says. He looks cold and hard, nothing like the always happy, joking Ezekiel I am used to being with. When I look again at Eric, I realize that he is making his way to our table.

"Well, well, all the Stiffs together having a little reunion." He drops into the chair on the other side of Tobias. You could cut the tension with a knife. "Aren't you going to introduce me?"

Zeke holds his body unnaturally rigid. I hold Adeline closer to me.

"These are Zeke's siblings, Tris and Uriah, and those are Tris's children," Tobias says in monotone. "Over there are Christina, Will and Al." Tobias almost seems to be trying to block us from Eric's view, but Eric just leans forward for a better look, then studies Uriah and Landon. Especially Landon. My heart pounds, Landon is Tobias's mini-me. Eric narrows his eyes and smirks. Then he turns back to Tobias.

"What have you been doing lately, Four?" Eric asks.

"Nothing, really," Four responds. Zeke motions to me and I stand and walk around the table. Out of the corner of my eye I notice Eric looking me up and down. His eyes are cold… almost like Marcus's. Almost like my father's were the night that I told him I was pregnant.

"Max tells me he keeps trying to meet with you, and you don't show up," Eric says. "He requested that I find out what is going on with you." I hand Adeline to my brother and he holds her protectively. I get the feeling that Eric is very bad news.

Four looks at Eric for a few seconds before saying, "Tell him that I am satisfied with the position I currently hold."

"So he wants to give you a job."

The rings in Eric's eyebrow catch the light. Maybe Eric perceives Four as a potential threat to his position. My father says that those who want power and get it live in terror of losing it. That's why we have to give power to those who do not want it. The thing I have learned, though, is that we can never really tell people's true intentions. Everyone believes Marcus isn't power-hungry, but I know better. He is a wolf in sheep's clothing.

"So it would seem," Four says as I return to my spot beside him.

"And you aren't interested."

"I haven't been interested for the last year."

"Well," says Eric. "Let's hope he gets the point, then."

He claps Four on the shoulder, a little too hard, and gets up. "Oh," he adds, "Max also said to let you know that baby cots are being delivered to the dormitory, and your slutty Stiff initiate will have daycare provided during training." I feel all the muscles in Tobias's body coil tight, and Zeke actually jumps to his feet. I place my hand on Tobias's thigh discretely to remind him not to give himself away to Eric, then shoot a look at my brother to remind him that he is holding my child. This is clearly not a good time to fight a Dauntless leader. "After we show the initiates to the dorms, Max wants to see us both to discuss the details." Eric smirks at Tobias, then at me, before turning and walking away to get his own meal. Zeke grits his teeth as he watches Eric go.

"I hate that bastard," Zeke growls.

"I got the feeling you weren't friends," Uriah says, smirking.

"He was in our initiation class," Tobias explains. "He transferred from Erudite." I nod. His mention of Erudite makes me think of Caleb, and I wish he were here with us. We aren't quite complete without him, even if he only sometimes hung out with us, but this is the way it is. It won't ever change. Caleb is Erudite now, and he always will be.

After we finish eating, Tobias stands and gestures for us to follow him. But then Eric reappears, says something to Tobias, and they have words for a moment. In the end, we all follow Eric, and Tobias trails behind us. I carry Adeline while Uriah keeps Landon. We stay near the back, and Tobias watches the babies as we walk. Adeline started crying a minute before we got up from the table and she hasn't calmed down much yet.

"Can't you shut that stupid kid up?" Eric calls back after a couple minutes, glaring at me.

"I would if I could," I retort.

"Isn't its dad in this faction somewhere?" He just called my daughter an "it". I hold back a growl. "Can't _he_ take care of it?"

"What makes you think her dad is here?" I sass.

Eric narrows his eyes, then turns back and keeps walking.

When we get to the dormitory, Eric explains the cuts. Tobias already told Uriah and me about that. So far, our class consists of twenty initiates: ten Dauntless-born and ten transfers. Only ten of the twenty will become members, with four cut at the end of stage one and the rest after the final test. The transfers cry out in outrage and I scan my eyes over the competition. It's going to be tough, some of them look pretty big. But this is what we trained for. Uriah and I will make it. We _will._

As we go to file into the dormitory, Tobias leans down and whispers in my ear, "meet me by the Chasm at 11:30. I'll wait for you." I nod then follow Uriah into the dorm, and Tobias walks away.


	10. Chapter 10

**ABNEGATION HELLIONS**

**CHAPTER FOUR**

**Four POV**

As Eric and I enter Max's office, I am steeled behind what Zeke calls my "Four face". It is the hard expression of an intimidating, emotionless Dauntless soldier, and when I wear it, the vulnerability that is present when I'm my real self ― Tobias, Tris's Tobias ― is locked behind impenetrable, protective walls. This is the Four that Max knows, and it is the only version of me that I can be to make it through this situation.

Before that newspaper article was released and I found out that I was a father, I only looked ahead to Tris's arrival with excitement. But ever since that day, I have anticipated the Choosing Day with a confusing tornado of emotion: excitement, longing, fear, uncertainty, anxiety. I was already slated to be her instructor. I could have asked to switch with Lauren and instructed the Dauntless-born instead… I could have stepped aside altogether. But I didn't. I want to be with Beatrice as much as possible, and even more than that… I want to protect her. Especially after seeing her attacked on the control room screens.

I don't regret my decision. I was uncertain how wise it was, but then when that Candor prick shoved her off the chasm earlier today, I was sure that this is where I need to be. If Eric has figured it out already, if they make me step aside, she will have Uriah, I remind myself. But I want to be there myself, I want to be sure that she will be safe. As safe as she can be here in Dauntless, anyway.

"Four, hello," Max says. "Take a seat." He gestures to the two hard chairs facing him from the other side of his desk. I would rather stand, but I do as I am told. Eric takes the seat next to me, crossing a leg over his knee and leaning back with his arms crossed over his chest. He eyes me, smirking.

"We need to discuss the Abnegation initiate, Beatrice Prior," Max says, skipping any further pleasantries and jumping right in.

I nod. "Yes, Eric said that you wanted to discuss the details of her… situation," I say. "And she goes by Tris now." So far, so good…

"Yes," Max says slowly. He runs his hand over his face and sighs. "Along with the initiate files sent over after the ceremony, we received the records for Tris's babies ― including their names. Their _full_ names." My face falls, cold Four persona faltering for just a second, and my pulse rushes in my ears. _Shit._ "I'm sure you already know where I'm going with this. I haven't forgotten who you are or where you came from." I swallow hard and nod slowly. "I also know that Eric gave you and Zeke the Erudite report about their birth, so you were aware that you probably had some children coming to Dauntless this year." Eric snickers.

I look down and take a deep breath. I don't want this dragged out any longer, I want to know what will happen to us. "What will this mean for Tris, and me, and initiation? Can I still be an instructor?"

Max eyes Eric and nods slowly. Eric's smirk drops from his face, he looks furious. He really thought he had me this time.

"I still want you to instruct the transfers. You're a good teacher, Four. Before he passed, Amar mentioned that you helped some fellow initiates and probably saved them from failing initiation." It was really only Shauna, but it's true ― she did improve a lot. "We need well-trained soldiers. However, Eric will, ultimately, be in charge of initiation this year. He will calculate the transfer initiates' scores and rankings, so you will need to arrange training to work with his schedule. Any activity that counts toward rankings, Eric needs to be there. Is that clear?"

My stomach clenches. I hate Eric. I don't want him around Tris. In fact, I would prefer to avoid having him interact with any of my initiates, any more than is absolutely necessary. But there is really not much I can do about it.

"I understand, sir."

Max pulls a glass and a bottle of amber-colored liquor out of a drawer. He pours himself a glass and brings it to his lips. Eric clears his throat and with an eyeroll, Max takes out another glass and pours about an inch of liquor in. He raises an eyebrow at me next, but I shake my head to decline.

"Now, about the babies," he continues, pausing to savor another mouthful of the spirits. "They're your kids, so Dauntless expects you to pay half of their daycare, food, clothing, and whatever else they need. The faction will provide the rest as their mother is a Dauntless initiate. Eric will make sure the funds are added to Tris's standard stipend."

"Of course. Thank you for providing a portion on Tris's behalf, sir."

Max nods and gestures to the door, dismissing me. I stand and walk toward the door. My whole body is tense from the conversation and in anticipation of all the time I will be spending with Eric over the next month.

"And, Four," Max calls as I reach the door, "I don't know whether you and Tris are still together, and I don't care. But you two should keep your relationship quiet until after initiation is over. It's in her best interest." With one more nod, I exit the head leader's office. I pause when I make it around the first corner at the end of the hallway and let all the air out of my lungs, and much of my tension with it.

I think about Max's advice to keep my relationship with Beatrice quiet. That had already been our plan, I was mostly worried about hiding from leadership. But Max is right, especially with psychopaths like Peter around. I don't think it would matter if Max himself told the initiates that I will have nothing to do with their scores. If Tris does well ― and I suspect that she will, as she has been training for three years and is the bravest person I know ― they will be jealous, and a relationship with their instructor will only add to their anger. She is already enough of a target, because of the babies and her Abnegation origins.

I run my hand over my face once before continuing toward my apartment. This is going to be one long, stressful month.

**-oOo-**

I get to the Chasm five minutes early, at eleven twenty-five. While the bars are still busy and there are still a few people walking through the faction here and there, most people have at least gone home for the night. Initiates have a curfew and set lights out time, so they should all be in bed and not wandering the compound where they might see us together.

I lean back against the simple metal railing that provides the only barrier from falling into the Chasm. While I wait for Tris, I wonder if she will come alone, or bring the babies. I am sure she told Uriah where she was going. I do want to see my children, but more than anything, I want to see Tris. Alone. We have not been alone even once in over a year now and I have missed how close we always were. She will probably come alone, I decide. It would be hard to leave the dormitory unnoticed with the babies, and Uriah knows how to take care of them. I wonder if I will ever be as comfortable with them as he is.

I glance toward the camera hidden in a light on a nearby rock wall. Because I work in the control room, I know where all the cameras are, though most Dauntless aren't even aware that nearly every public move they make is recorded and watched. Zeke is working tonight, probably watching me right now. It took him over a month to speak to me again after we found out about the twins' birth, and another month after that before I really thought we would ever be friends again.

Those few months were particularly hard on Shauna. She never abandoned her friendship with me, even though she was dating Zeke and he made it very clear that he did not approve. In the end, it was Shauna who chewed Zeke out and convinced him to speak to me again. We never really told her exactly what our fight was about, but she knew that Zeke was angry about the news he received about his sister. Shauna may not be Erudite, but she knows what faction I came from and that Zeke and I have been friends for most of our lives. It wasn't hard for her to work it out. I am not even sure if Zeke would have forgiven Tris yet had it not been for Shauna's tough love.

I snap out of my thoughts when I see Tris approaching and I quickly break into a smile. She grins back at me. My arms flinch, I start to reach for her by instinct but I stop myself. I cannot touch her, not in public. Not yet. We stand a little closer than we probably should, but still neither of us distances ourselves from the other.

"Hi," she smiles.

"Hi," I grin back, then I struggle to wipe the happiness off my face and look like my usual emotionless self. It's hard, nearly impossible, but I think I manage it. As long as no one looks too close, anyway. "Come on, let's go somewhere more private." Again I start to reach for her hand, but then realize what I am doing and let my arm fall back to my side. How will I ever get through a month of initiation?

"Your place?" Tris asks hopefully, raising an eyebrow. The corners of my mouth twitch. I nod and then start walking away from the Chasm, motioning with one hand for her to follow me.

We don't pass anyone I know on the way to my apartment. When the door is closed behind us I breathe out; I feel like I didn't breathe all the way here.

Tris walks to the middle of my large studio apartment and slowly turns in a circle, looking around. She pauses reading the wall where I have spray painted the words _FEAR GOD ALONE_.

"I know it's not ideal…" I say, scratching the back of my neck. "I was thinking once you finish initiation, we can put in for a different apartment… one for a family, so that the twins can have their own room and we can have some privacy... " Tris turns back to me with a smile slowly forming on her face as I continue to ramble. "I don't know if we will even bring the babies here at all during initiation so I don't have anything set up for them. But if you think I'll be keeping them here at all, we can get a crib now. I just thought… maybe it's better to wait until we're moving into the new place…" She's grinning at me. I smile back. "What?"

"You want us to live with you?" she asks.

My mouth falls open. Of course I want her to live with me. What if she doesn't want that? "Oh… I just assumed…" I swallow hard. I feel sick to my stomach, I can't believe I never considered that maybe she wasn't as sure as I was. "If… if you don't want to then… I mean, we don't have to, I just thought…"

"Yes, Tobias," she breathes as she steps toward me and closes the distance between us. She wraps her arms around my body. "Of course I want that, too. I just wasn't sure that was what _you_ wanted."

I sigh in total relief and hug her back. "It's all I've ever wanted, Beatrice," I murmur. She tilts her chin up to look at me, and I can't wait a moment longer ― I close the distance between us and crash my lips against hers. We kiss each other hungrily… it has been too long since we could really just be Tobias and Beatrice. When she isn't with me, it is like a piece of me is missing.

I pull back and look at her. "You can't imagine how much I've missed you," I say as I catch my breath.

Tris smiles. "Oh, I definitely can imagine it, because I have missed you just as much," Tris says. "I love you."

"I love you too," I murmur just before I capture her lips with mine again.

While we kiss, I slowly walk her backward until she stops when I have her pressed against my bed. We stumble back onto the bed and I cover her body with mine. Our hands and lips roam each other's bodies, re-exploring territory we mapped long ago as a pile of discarded clothing slowly forms on the floor next to the bed. And finally, _finally_, we connect again, in body and soul.


	11. Chapter 11

_Hey everyone, I hope you are all staying safe and healthy! _

_I have decided that from here on out I plan to update this story once a week, probably on Thursdays. That will hopefully give me time to keep writing enough that we won't have long waits between chapters down the road. It might still happen... life is hard to predict. But for now that's my plan. I am going to try to get Count On Me onto an update schedule as well, probably every other week though since I don't have any chapters completed and in reserve for that one. _

_Stay safe, and stay home to protect yourself and everyone else, and wash your hands! LOL. Thanks so much for your favorites, follows and reviews! I LOVE hearing what you think!_

* * *

**CHAPTER ELEVEN**

**Tris POV**

Today is the first day of initiation… and I am running late. I was tired from my late night with Tobias (though it was definitely worth it) and overslept. Even with Uriah helping me get the babies ready to go to the daycare, I didn't make it out of the dormitory with them early enough. I didn't even get a chance to eat any breakfast.

I rush into the training room the next morning to find everyone standing in a line facing a row of targets. Tobias pauses in the middle of whatever he has been saying and the whole group turns to stare at me. I silently curse as I feel my cheeks flush; I hate how easily it shows on my face when I am embarrassed.

"Tris," Tobias says in a stern voice that doesn't sound like _my_ Tobias at all. "Nice of you to join us. If you want to stay in Dauntless, I suggest that you arrive to training on time in the future." In the training room, or anywhere around the other initiates, he is _Four_; I guess I had better get used to it. Even though dropping off _his_ children at daycare is what made me late. They kept me there a lot longer than I had expected so they could go over everything related to the babies and daycare policies.

"I apologize," I say as I take my place next to Uriah — he saved a spot for me. "I'll be sure to leave earlier for the daycare in the future." Tobias nods and continues pacing in front of the line of initiates. He presses a gun into my hands as he passes me.

"As I was saying," Tobias continues, "the first stage is physical, intended to train your body to respond to threats. This is training you will need in order to survive life as a Dauntless." He goes on to explain the stages of initiation — first physical, second stage emotional and third stage, mental — and goes over the cuts in a little more detail than Eric did yesterday. Tobias told Uriah and me all about the different stages and how the rankings work when he visited last week, so I kind of zone out until, out of the corner of my eye, I see Tobias quickly turn and press a gun to an initiate's forehead. I hear the bullet click into place.

My jaw drops and I lean forward to peer down the line of initiates. Peter. He stands frozen mid-yawn, looking positively terrified. I wonder what that pansycake did to piss Tobias off; I'm sure it wouldn't take much. Tobias hates his guts already.

"Wake. Up," Tobias snaps at Peter. "You're holding a loaded gun, you idiot. Act like it." Tobias lowers the gun; Peter's green eyes harden and his cheeks turn red. To his credit, Peter doesn't say anything; he isn't as stupid as I thought. After speaking his mind all his life in Candor, I am not sure anything short of the gun Tobias held to Peter's head could scare him into holding his tongue.

"And to answer your question," Tobias says as he resumes his walk down the line of initiates, "you are far less likely to soil your pants and cry for your mother if you are prepared to defend yourself." He stops at the end of the line of initiates. "This is also information you may need later in stage one, so watch carefully."

And I do watch carefully… though I spend a lot more time admiring the way Tobias's rock hard muscles flex under his tight black t-shirt than actually paying any attention to what he is teaching us. Then again, I have practiced this for years now. We used guns that shoot plastic pellets, not actual bullets, but I know what I am doing.

Uriah elbows me a second before the other initiates begin to shoot. "Stop staring," he mouths to me. I blush. I know he is right, we definitely don't need anyone noticing anything between Tobias and me. I take a deep breath and roll the tension from my shoulders before I take my stance and aim the gun.

As I aim, Uriah fires his first shot. It hits inches to the right of his target. He grins at me and winks. _Right. We have to hold back._ We should not have been training in Abnegation, and we need to hide our skills here. I do the same, aiming for the outer ring of the target.

The kickback of the gun is more than I expected and I stumble back into the wall behind me. The bullet missed the target entirely. Maybe I won't have to pretend as much as I thought I would need to. I aim for the outer ring of the target, and after a couple more shots, I've got the hang of it.

Uriah and I both gradually aim closer to the bullseye, but I soon get tired of pretending to be bad at this and start hitting within the inner circle.

"Wow, Tris," Christina says from my other side, "you and Uriah are catching on quickly." My twin and I glance at each other and shrug. Other than Uri and me, only Edward and Peter have hit the inner circle so far.

By the time we break for lunch, most of the initiates have decent aim and Uriah and I are among the best in the group.

We walk to the dining hall with Christina, Will and Al. The boys walk ahead of us explaining some game called basketball to Uriah, and Christina and I trail behind them. She hooks her arm through mine as we walk. It makes me smile. I have never had a girlfriend like her before; my only friends have always been my brothers and Tobias. And obviously my "friendship" with Tobias is entirely different.

"God, Four is _intense,_ huh?" Christina hisses, leaning closer to me, like she's afraid Tobias is lurking around a corner trying to listen in. "He's so hot, but he's scary! And kind of a jerk."

I bite my cheek to stop myself from snapping at her. I hate hearing anyone speak about Tobias that way, but I have a feeling I will have to get used to it. Christina doesn't know him, she has never met _Tobias,_ only Four.

"Peter deserved that," I argue. "This isn't Candor. Like Uriah told you yesterday, we are training to be soldiers and can't be mouthing off to our superiors like that." I stop myself from pointing out that Peter already pissed Four off yesterday when he tried to push me over the railing at the chasm. That instance alone won't draw attention to our relationship, but who knows what is to come. I have worked too hard already, I don't want anyone noticing that Tobias cares for me and thinking I slept my way through Dauntless initiation. They already think I'm a slut, so I have no doubt that they would jump to conclusions.

Christina looks at me strangely then shrugs. "Hey, Uri," I call out. Uriah turns around. "I was thinking about checking on the twins. Do you want to come?"

Uriah checks his watch. "We only have half an hour, sis. I think we had better wait until training is over. You might get caught up with them and you were already late this morning. Don't forget what Four said this morning about making you factionless." He gives me a pointed look and I know what he is saying: _don't put him in a bad position, Beatrice._ I sigh and nod.

I miss my babies during lunch, and worse, I spend the whole time watching Christina flirt with Will and Uriah flirt with Marlene. Lynn spends the whole time glaring at her plate; she isn't very friendly. Al tries to talk to me, and I try to hold a conversation, I do try.

But I am distracted, watching Tobias out of the corner of my eye. He is sitting at another table with Zeke and Shauna… and the Dauntless-born instructor, Lauren. I remember how she put her hand on Tobias's shoulder yesterday, but I also remember how he brushed her off. Today she sits next to him at their table, laughing just about every time he opens his mouth — which has to be fake, because while he certainly has his moments, Tobias is not someone who constantly jokes around — and occasionally playfully smacking his arm.

She is definitely flirting, and he seems entirely oblivious to it. Once, he even makes eye contact with me and smiles a little — not in a taunting way, but completely genuine.

By the time we get back to the training room, I am pissed off. Uriah finally notices and grabs my arm, holding me back to trail behind the others. "What's the matter?" he asks.

"Some girl was trying to flirt with Tobias all through lunch," I hiss. "I just wanted to rip the piercings right out of her eyebrow."

Uriah rolls his eyes. "Did he flirt back?"

"No," I admit.

"Then get over it, Tris. No one knows he's taken, so you can't really blame girls for trying. Now, if she does it again once you guys go public, then you can rip out her piercings," he grins.

I laugh. "I'll look forward to that."

We walk in silence the rest of the way back to training. When we are almost there Uriah stops me. "Tris, remember. Don't let those pansycakes see how good you are. You want to surprise them tomorrow, yeah?"

I nod. "Right. Thanks, Uri." Damn. I was really looking forward to picturing Lauren's face on that punching bag. I guess that will have to wait for another time.

**-oOo-**

**Four POV**

I take a beer out of Zeke's fridge and pry off the cap with a bottle opener. "So how are they doing so far, man?" Zeke asks me. I roll my eyes, but when I look up he looks genuinely nervous and I laugh.

"They're my star initiates, Zeke," I reply. "They try not to make it too obvious, but anyone who is really paying attention can see it. They've trained hard for this. I just hope Eric doesn't notice." He has not showed up to training so far, but he is sure to be there for the fights tomorrow. Training ahead of initiation is not illegal, but for the transfers, it means that they actively refused to conform to their previous faction's customs. Basically, should the wrong people find out, it is a sure way to end up with the leaders keeping an eye on you… and not in a good way.

Zeke laughs. "Speaking of Eric, I listened in on an argument between him and Max last night. Eric was so pissed at Max for letting you off the hook so easy about Beatrice."

There is a knock at the door and Zeke goes to open it. I lean against the counter that separates his kitchen and living room and sip my beer. "What was I supposed to do?" I ask, annoyed, as Zeke lets Tris and Uriah in, each of them carrying a baby. "When I asked to train initiates I had no idea it would be this complicated. And they have no proof that I knew before yesterday that she would come to Dauntless."

"And that's what Max told him," Zeke replies as he takes Landon out of Uriah's arms.

I set down my beer and take Adeline after giving Tris a quick kiss on the cheek. Adeline immediately begins crying and my heart sinks. "Tris," I say, "our daughter hates me."

"Adeline hates everyone," Uriah pipes up. "Don't take it personal."

Shauna comes out of the bedroom towel drying her hair. I didn't even know she was home. "Yeah, she hates me, too. Hey, Tris, have you tried a pacifier?"

"A what?" Tris asks, confused. In my mind, I vaguely conjure up an image of a little plastic contraption I have seen babies here in Dauntless sucking on. I think that's what she is talking about. We didn't have those in Abnegation.

"I think it's a little plastic thing that babies suck on to soothe them," I explain. Shauna nods, giving us an odd look.

"The Abnegation don't use those," Zeke explains, speaking extra-loud to be heard over Adeline's cries. "Probably teaches babies to be too self-indulgent or something."

"They're _babies_!" Shauna screams, exasperated. "Ugh, come on, Four, let's go buy your poor cranky child a damn pacifier and give these guys some Prior-sibling-time. You know they've been craving it." I laugh and hand the child who hates me back to her mother, and Shauna grabs me by the elbow and drags me out the door.

Shauna and I walk together without speaking for a minute before she breaks the silence. "So, Zeke said he saw you meet up with you-know-who last night." I grin and feel my cheeks heat up, I am sure they are bright red. "That good, huh?" she laughs, elbowing me.

"Shut up," I mutter. "A year is a long time. I really missed her."

"Yeah, I bet you did," Shauna says, wiggling her eyebrows. I push her. "Don't worry about the baby. She's just cranky. Some babies are like that."

"I have visited several times before yesterday, Shauna," I say, shaking my head. "She has cried every single time. She doesn't like me."

"She will," Shauna insists. I nod, even though I am not sure I believe her.

At the pharmacy, it turns out that there are nine kinds of pacifiers to choose from, each shaped a little differently than the others. "We didn't even have these in Abnegation," I mutter. "How am I supposed to know which one to get?"

"Um, let's just… choose a couple different ones, and hope for the best," Shauna suggests. We end up putting five different pacifiers in the basket. I pause almost as an afterthought and throw some baby wipes and a couple packages of diapers into the basket. I have to guess how much each of the twins weigh and use the guide on the side of the package, but Shauna agrees that my choice is probably the right one. I'll be sure to keep the receipt in case Tris needs to exchange them.

As we approach the checkout, I internally groan. I recognize the cashier: Nicole. Shortly after my initiation, when Zeke still didn't know about my relationship with his sister, I reluctantly agreed to come along on a double-date with Zeke, his date Maria, and her friend, Nicole. Zeke quickly ended up off in some corner making out with Maria. Meanwhile, I offended Nicole within the first five minutes and she stormed off. If I am being honest, I was relieved; I had no intention of kissing anyone but Beatrice, so I was very nervous about the whole situation.

I have seen Nicole a few times around the compound since then. The first couple of times, she just glared at me, but the last time was out of the norm. She was oddly friendly.

Shauna puts the basket of baby items on the counter. Nicole's eyebrows knit together as she scans them. "Why are you guys buying pacifiers and diapers? I didn't think either of you had any kids?"

I roll my eyes. How is this her business?

"They're for Zeke's niece," Shauna says with a scowl. She has not forgotten about that double date either. She already liked Zeke then, and she was there when he talked me into going. I remember how angry Shauna was when we stumbled upon him in a dark hallway, still making out with Maria.

"Oh," Nicole breathes, her face relaxing back to a friendly smile.

I pay, which has Nicole looking a little confused again, so I distract her by being unusually nice. Well, nice for me, anyway. "Thank you, Nicole. Good to see you," I say, smiling at her as Shauna picks up the plastic bag full of our purchases and we walk back out into the Pit.

"A word of advice, Four," Shauna says as we walk through the Pit. "Be careful how nice you are to girls. Nicole likes you and if you give girls like her the wrong idea, you're going to have one pissed off girlfriend."

"Nicole hates me!" I protest. "I didn't last five minutes on that date, remember? Which was perfectly fine with me, but―"

Shauna just laughs. "You are so clueless, Four." What the hell is she talking about?

**-oOo-**

Tris and Uriah both look exhausted at training the next morning. Adeline was not interested in any of the five pacifiers we offered her last night, and by looking at the Original Prior Twins, the baby must have remained pissed off all night long. I feel bad imagining them taking turns pacing the hall with a crying baby.

While the initiates are warming up, I begin writing the fight pairings on the chalkboard. _Peter vs. Al,_ I begin. On the next line, _Christina vs. Tris. Uriah vs. Will…_

I am interrupted when the door opens so hard that it slams against the wall behind it. All the initiates jump and look in the direction of the noise, as do I.

Eric. Of course it is Eric. I knew he would be here today.

He approaches me and looks over the pairings. "Who's who, again?" he asks. I sigh and point to the initiates one by one, telling him their names.

"Ah, right," he says. "Erase the board and I will pair them up properly," he smirks. This can't be good.

I move away from him and watch the initiates warm up while he makes up the "proper" pairings. He punches me in the arm when he's done, as if he's being friendly, but actually it will probably leave a bruise. I look at the board.

_Tris vs. Molly  
Will vs. Al  
Peter vs. Uriah  
Myra vs. Edward  
Drew vs. Christina_

I was trying to go a little easier on Tris and Uriah today since I could see how exhausted they were, but of course Eric has to try and pick on them. He will be in for a surprise when he sees how good they are, I think, forcing myself to keep the smirk off my face.

"First jumper and last jumper, in the ring," Eric yells.

Tris straightens and takes off her shoes, then makes her way to the mat and from across the room, Molly does the same. Tris looks nervous; I hope it's for show. I am confident that she will be fine, but if she doesn't share that confidence, it might affect her performance in the fight

Then again, the dark circles under Tris's eyes are less than reassuring.

"Remember, you can't jump in and save her," Eric taunts me quietly as Tris and Molly take their fighting stances. I glare at Eric. His smile widens, stretching the holes of his piercings. He looks grotesque and I look away in disgust.

Molly is tall and stocky, Tris's complete opposite. In fact, she's probably got at least sixty or seventy pounds on Tris. She smiles arrogantly, she thinks she has already won.

Molly makes the first move. She goes for a right hook — sloppily, I might add. Tris easily dodges it. It goes on like this for a minute: Molly swinging punches and kicking, and Tris easily dodging Molly's advances. "Stop playing around," Eric snarls, becoming impatient.

"How do they win? Is it scored?" Al calls out from the sidelines.

Eric rolls his eyes. "It's over when one of them can no longer continue. In other words, when one of them is knocked out."

"Or until one of them concedes," I cut in.

Eric glares. "No, Four, in the new rules no one concedes."

"Good thing those weren't the rules when we fought," I mutter just loud enough for only Eric to hear. But I know I am on thin ice right now with my whole situation with Tris. It would be unwise to push this issue any further.

Eric and I are so busy with our stare-down that we almost miss it. We look away from each other when we hear a loud _thud_ and I glance again at Eric to see him looking shocked at the sight of Molly laid out flat on the mat, with Tris's foot pressed firmly to Molly's chest. Blood streams from Molly's nose.

Tris looks to me and I nod. And with that, Tris delivers a clean blow to Molly's temple, and the light leaves the girl's eyes.

"Dammit," Eric mutters. "I didn't see how she managed that." I smirk as I circle Tris's name on the board and Eric orders someone to drag Molly off the mat.

I make eye contact with Tris and smile at her with my eyes, trying to congratulate her. But in the back of my mind, while I am still proud of her, I am worried… worried about what Eric might try next.


	12. Chapter 12

_Sorry this is a day late! The chapter was done long ago, I only had to edit it, but homeschooling 3 kids is kicking my ass. And it's official that school buildings will not reopen before this school year ends. If I'm late again, I haven't forgotten, I probably just had a rough week!_

**CHAPTER TWELVE**

**Tris POV**

"Christina!" I hiss while shaking her shoulder with my free hand. The other is occupied holding Landon. I let go of Christina to adjust my hold on him, he's so squirmy this morning.

"Go away," she groans and Uri snickers behind me.

"Get your loudmouth ass out of bed Christina!" Uriah shouts. "Or else you'll have to meet at the tracks with bedhead and no makeup!"

Christina shoots upright. "I'm up, I'm up! Jeez, Uriah!" she shrieks and Uriah and I laugh.

"Get dressed, pansycake," I laugh. "I'll get these monsters to daycare. Uriah, would you please grab muffins for Christina and me for breakfast? We'll all meet at the tracks in twenty."

"Yes!" Uriah shouts, startling Adeline so she starts crying. Uriah points a finger at me, not reacting to the baby's screaming. "I told you I'd bring 'pansycake' back! You just used it!"

I groan as I take Miss Cranky-Pants, aka Adeline, in my free arm and head to the daycare. The goodbye is tearful on Adeline's part while Landon is cheerful as ever greeting his teachers. When I finally pry myself away from my daughter, I have to sprint to the tracks.

I can already hear the train approaching when I reach the group of initiates. Uriah tosses me a plastic-wrapped chocolate muffin. I catch it with one hand then shove it into my pocket.

"Cutting it close, initiate!" Tobias shouts as he begins to jog alongside the train.

Tobias jumps on and I quickly follow. "Your daughter is rather demanding," I say quickly as I pass him, intentionally brushing my hand against his just as Uriah swings through the door.

Tobias looks at me apologetically as more initiates pile in. I know he feels badly that he can't help me more. Soon, when initiation is over, things will be different. Better.

The cliques sit together, as usual. Peter, Molly and Drew huddle together in the far corner with Edward and Myra making out a few feet away. I sit a few yards away from them with Uriah, Christina, Will and Al.

Uriah stretches with a yawn that turns into a groan. He had to fight Peter yesterday. Uriah won, but he didn't come out unscathed. "Feeling a little… _Stiff?" _Peter shoots at Uriah, snickering, and his friends laugh along as if he just made the most clever joke they ever heard. When Molly laughs, she sounds like an animal in the Amity farms, and Drew's laugh is silent; I can only tell he's laughing by the way his body shakes, but he looks like he could just as easily be crying.

"Did you think we missed the way you hobbled over here, Peter?" I retort. "_You_ looked like the stiff one. You and Molly, both beaten by former Abnegations in your first fight, I'm surprised you wanted to remind everyone."

"Oh, don't worry, Stiff, that won't happen again," Peter sneers. "You and your little boyfriend caught us by surprise yesterday, but that was a one-time thing."

Uriah rolls his eyes. "First of all — boyfriend? Gross, she's my sister. You may be into that sort of thing, but we're not." Peter scowls. "And second… I can see why you didn't choose Erudite, because you must be pretty stupid. It's not the first time I've beaten you in a fight."

"Enough!" Tobias shouts from his spot by the door of the train car. "Am I going to have to listen to you bicker all the way to the fence?"

Peter glowers and looks away, defeated. He and his minions huddle together, whispering. It makes me a little nervous, since Peter has proved more than once that he won't hesitate to attack someone when they aren't ready for it, but I ignore them. Or pretend to, at least.

My friends are chatting with one another but I'm not really listening. I am too busy watching Tobias. I've found that this happens frequently — I'm always tuning out everything going on around me, too busy checking out my sexy boyfriend.

On his rare visits over the past few months, I witnessed the ways Tobias had changed from our childhoods in Abnegation, but I am still awestruck when I look at him. In Abnegation we had trained frequently, but he was still pretty scrawny. Not only was he underfed by his bastard of a father, but Marcus's punishments often left him too injured to train with the rest of us. But here, now that he has been in Dauntless for a year… wow. No more baggy Abnegation clothes; his Dauntless black is always fitted, hugging his defined muscles in just the right way. His hair is still short by Dauntless standards, but much longer than it was in Abnegation. Every time I notice it I just want to run my fingers through his soft, dark curls.

Right now, those curls are blowing around in the wind created by the train's speed. Tobias stands at the train car door, his toes hanging over the edge. Both hands grip the sides of the doorway, arms stretched wide, and he leans forward, just a bit out of the car.

I don't realize I have completely zoned out and been staring at him until Christina says in my ear, "He may be scary, but there's no denying that he is smoking hot, right?" My cheeks and ears immediately heat up; she caught me staring. It's not all embarrassment; I push down my impulse to tell her to back the hell off, because he is _mine._ I hate having to hide what he is to me.

So I just nod. Christina laughs at my red cheeks. "Still a Stiff, aren't you, Tris?" she giggles.

I glare. "I'm pretty sure there are two little babies in the daycare that prove I'm not, thank you very much," I retort. Then I blush harder, feeling like I practically just agreed with all the people who have taunted me, calling me the "Slutty Stiff." It's like I can't win — I'm either frigid, or I'm a slut. Can't there be an in-between? There must be, right? I'm Dauntless now, after all. I wonder if I will ever be able to fully set aside the Abnegation principles I was raised to live out, and, more importantly, the baggage that comes with it. I sigh heavily.

"Speaking of that," Christina says, drawing out her words. "You still haven't told me anything about how that happened."

I raise an eyebrow. "I guess you weren't paying much attention in health class, Christina? Are you looking for a tutorial?" I tease.

"Shut _up_!" Christina laughs. "You know what I mean! Spill! I want all the dirty details." I laugh nervously. Tobias glances back at us, and Uriah looks uncomfortable. There's my out, at least for now.

"Not a conversation I want to have with my brother three feet away, Chris." My eyes dart to Tobias for a fraction of a second. "If at all," I add.

"Aw, come on!" Christina whines. I roll my eyes and shake my head, and she huffs, knowing she has lost. "You'll tell me eventually. I _will_ get it out of you," Christina smirks.

**-oOo-**

The visit to the fence is quite uneventful, though I did briefly see Robert, my former neighbor from Abnegation. I was too anxious about trusting my babies with Shauna, still a stranger to me at the time, to watch the rest of the ceremony after I chose. I had not even realized that Robert had chosen Amity until I saw him hop off that truck today. He spoke with Uriah and me and was polite and friendly, as always. He asked about the twins, and waved at Tobias, who didn't respond at all.

And thanks to that awkward hug that Robert gave me, Tobias has been pouting the whole train ride back to Dauntless. Uriah whispered to me not to worry, that Tobias will get over it. I am sure he will, but I still don't like feeling as though I did something to upset him. There has never been anything between Robert Black and me and I would never betray Tobias. Robert was only giving me the usual Amity greeting, as he has been learning in his initiation into Amity.

Tobias's scowl distracts me as I prepare to jump when we arrive back at the Dauntless compound. I guess that is why I am not staying nearer to Uriah and my friends, and why I am not paying attention to my surroundings as Tobias jumps out of the train and I start to position myself to follow. I feel a shove from behind me and stumble forward, dangerously close to the open door of the train car. I scramble to regain my balance, and just when I know I will be successful, a foot catches my ankle. This time, there is no floor left for me to step on, there will be no catching myself.

I scream as I fall, flail as I scramble to find a position that will allow me to roll when I hit the ground. I fail. The heel of my left palm slams hard into the ground just before I belly flop onto the hard asphalt. I barely have time to register the intense jolt of pain shooting up my arm before the wind is forcefully knocked out of me. I can't breathe, my need to suck in air is all I can think about because I simply cannot do it. It's like my chest is paralyzed.

After a moment my lungs begin to expand again. I am so grateful for the feeling of air coming into my lungs, but it is short lived; I am overcome by an excruciating pain in my chest as I breathe in.

The ground vibrates beneath me each time Tobias's boots thud against the asphalt as he runs toward me. My eyes are squeezed shut from the pain radiating through my arm and chest in waves, but I know it's him, and I know he's right there when his hand touches my cheek. "Beatrice?! _Tris_ — are you alright? Look at me, baby," he says frantically, the last part just a whisper as I hear more footsteps pounding toward me.

I take a few shallow breaths before answering, and by the time I do there's a smaller, lighter hand on my back and Tobias is no longer touching me. "Y-yeah," I say shakily. "No — yes — I don't know, it really hurts."

"Where does it hurt?" I hear Uriah ask as he sets a hand lightly on my back.

"Arm and ribs," I grit out.

"What the hell happened?!" Tobias shouts, and I just keep focusing on breathing in and out, still shallow.

Christina speaks up. "Molly pushed her. She had almost caught her balance then Peter tripped her right out of the train car!" she fumes. "_Those_ three" I assume she means Peter, Drew and Molly "were blocking us and we couldn't reach her." I open my eyes and look at Tobias; his fists are clenched and his face is red. It is clear that he is furious.

"Uriah!" Tobias barks. "Get her to the infirmary. I need to speak to Max."


	13. Chapter 13

_A/N: I am sooooo sorry this took so long. I know I said there shouldn't be any long waits between updates, but my laptop broke a couple of weeks ago and I absolutely hate trying to edit or write on my phone or tablet. I might have done it anyway if it were just fixing punctuation and typos, but I knew I wanted to make some actual revisions._

_I finally got a new laptop, literally today, so I hurried to get this chapter revised and edited for you. It's not my favorite, but I don't want to make you wait any longer just so I can keep fighting with it. _

_I honestly am not going to promise that I'll be sticking to a weekly update from here on out. I will try, but things are obviously pretty weird right now._

_I also want to say thank you so much to each of you who has left a review, followed, or favorited! I appreciate it so much even if I don't always respond._

_Stay safe and stay healthy!_

* * *

**CHAPTER THIRTEEN**

**Tris POV**

"What the hell happened?!" Marlene asks as she bounds into the infirmary an hour later, Lynn strolling behind her, looking bored. I can't help smiling when she pulls the second visitor over and sits so close that she and Uriah are almost touching.

Lynn stands a couple of yards away from us, arms crossed over her chest. "Will said you fell out of the train car. What, did you trip?" she snarks, raising an eyebrow.

I am lying in the infirmary bed feeling a lot better thanks to the wrap around my fractured ribs, brace on my sprained wrist, and the injection of pain medication the nurse administered shortly after I arrived. Christina has gone to get my babies from the daycare, and Uriah hasn't left my side. There has been no sign of Tobias so far.

Uriah recounts the incident once again; he has already been over it once with Tobias, and then twice more with the infirmary staff. The pain was so intense at first that it was hard to breathe or think, and I am thankful for his and Christina's help. I don't know what I would do without my twin and my friends.

"You'd better be careful, Tris," Marlene warns. "Uriah told me about what Peter did on the first day here. I don't think he's going to stop."

"You just need to pay more attention to your surroundings," Lynn advises, dragging a chair from beside the empty bed next to mine and dropping gracelessly into it. "Shauna told me you guys have been training, so I'm sure you can kick that coward's ass if you see him coming."

I know she is right, I can hold my own. As long as it's only Peter, anyway. I don't think I could take him, Molly and Drew on all together. I will have to make sure I don't get caught alone… which will make it harder for me to sneak away to see Tobias. If only he did not distract me so.

"I don't even want to think about having to defend myself against Peter right now," I whine. "I'm feeling alright now with these pain killers, but when they wear off I know it's gonna hurt to even move."

"You'll have to get over it," Lynn snorts. "You'll be fighting tomorrow no matter how banged up you are. It's that, or be factionless." I groan.

Marlene and Uriah are talking quietly, looking at each other like there is no one else in the world. I smirk when I notice how close they are to one another, the gentle, deliberate way Uri touches her arm, the pink tint Marlene's cheeks take on at the contact.

"So," Marlene says to all of us, "Lynn and I were going to the dining hall to play some cards. Do you want to come, Uriah? You too, of course, Tris, if they let you out of here." Lynn huffs, but I ignore her. She's always irritated about something.

"I don't want to leave Tris on her own," Uriah says regretfully.

I roll my eyes. It has become more and more obvious to me that Uriah really likes Marlene; I don't want to get in their way. "Go ahead, Uri. I'll be fine."

Uriah shakes his head. "No. I'm not leaving you here alone. Let me find a nurse, see how long you have to stay here."

"Seriously, Uri," I protest. "Christina will be here any minute with the twins. They have that check-up this afternoon, remember?"

"Oh yeah," Uriah frowns. I wish he would just go with them. I want him here, but I don't want to get in the way of my brother's blossoming romance. He turns to Marlene. "Can we at least wait for Chris to get here? I would feel better if I knew that she would wait for Tris. There's no way she can carry around two babies by herself right now." He makes a good point.

At that moment, Zeke rushes in. "Beatrice!" he shouts on his way over, and a nurse with purple hair and piercings all over her face glares at him. He smiles apologetically. "Tris, are you alright? I came as soon as I could get out of work," Zeke says hurriedly. "I had just gotten back from a break when Four stopped by on his way to see Max."

"Four went to Max?" Christina asks, surprised, as she joins us. She hands Landon to Zeke as she sits on the edge of my bed. She offers Adeline to me and I shake my head with wide eyes. Adeline, for once, looks perfectly content in Christina's arms.

"Keep holding her, please," I cut in. "She's happy with you and I am pretty sure it's going to hurt to hold either of them for a while." Christina nods.

"Of course he did," Zeke answers Christina, bouncing Landon in his arms. Landon smiles widely. "He's responsible for the initiate class and he can't have them trying to kill each other. Besides that, you don't really think he's going to let anything happen to _my_ baby sister, do you?"

Christina shrugs. "He just doesn't seem that nice. I didn't know he actually gave a shit about any of us."

"Jeez, Chris," I say, rolling my eyes as I try to hide my anger at her attitude toward Tobias. "Four isn't a monster. Of course he doesn't want things like this to happen."

"Yeah, you think I'd be friends with someone who was that big of a jerk?" Zeke says, scowling. "Four's a good guy. It's not like he's _Eric._" Lynn snorts and smirks before going back to her usual disinterest and perma-scowl.

"Actually, you're right," Christina says, suddenly a scrutinizing gaze on me. "This isn't the first time he's stuck up for Tris."

"Do you think Max will do anything?" Uriah interrupts, frowning. Thank goodness he took the attention off Tobias and me.

Zeke shrugs. "Hard to say. I'm sure Four will be here soon to let us know how it went."

"Uriah," I remind my twin, "you should go hang out with Marlene and Lynn now. I'm sure Zeke or Christina will keep me company, right guys?"

"Of course," Christina says. At the same time, Zeke says, "Anything for my baby sister. Actually, why don't I take care of the twins for you when you're done here, and you can spend some time with your friends? _Some_ parts of initiation should be fun, you know."

I am touched by the offer, but my babies (mostly Adeline) can be a lot to handle and Zeke doesn't have a whole lot of experience with them. "I don't know, Zeke… are you sure? Two babies is a lot for one person when you're not used to it."

Zeke rolls his eyes. "I'll be fine, Sis. I'm sure I can find _someone_ to help me," he grins.

I smile. I know he means Tobias. "Okay, if you're sure," I smile. Tobias should be here soon. I painfully straighten as I suddenly realize that if Tobias is coming soon, it might be better if my friends are all gone before he arrives.

"Actually, Chris, why don't you go with them and have fun? I wouldn't mind some time with my big brother." I suggest.

"Okay," Christina says cheerfully. "Oh, wait, but I wanted to talk to you more about… _you know._" She side-eyes Zeke for that last part. Ugh, of course. Her promise to continue badgering me to tell her about the twins' father.

"Oh, you mean interrogate?" I quip. I laugh at the sheepish look on her face. "Just go, Christina. Have fun."

"Fine. I hope they let you out soon, Tris!" Christina stands up and handing Adeline to Zeke, who immediately looks nervous and overwhelmed with a baby in each arm.

Uriah gives me a questioning look, asking if I am sure it's okay for him to go with them, and I shoo him away. "Come find me when you're done here," Uriah says firmly. "And stay with Zeke or Four till then. Okay, sis?"

I roll my eyes at his protectiveness, but I know he's not wrong. In addition to any potential threat from Peter and his friends, I am in no shape to take care of both of these babies alone. "I will," I promise, and everyone says goodbye before they leave.

When they're gone, Zeke asks, "What was Christina going to interrogate you about?"

"All the dirty details about the twins' father," I say bluntly. He shudders at the idea of that conversation and quickly changes the subject.

Zeke makes me tell the story of my fall from the train car one more time, in detail, looking furious the entire time. I would not want to be Peter and Molly right now; I'm sure Zeke will be seeking them out later. Just as I finish my story, Four strolls in. He looks casual, but I can see the subtle hints of tension in his face and stance. He is feigning casualness, trying very hard to look as though he is just visiting any random initiate. When he sees that it's just Zeke and me here, he drops the act and hurries to my side and crouches next to the bed. For once I am looking down at him, instead of the other way around.

"God, Tris, are you okay? I'm sorry I couldn't be here sooner." He slips his hand into mine and rubs his thumb gently back and forth inside my palm.

"I'll be fine. Just some hairline fractures in my ribs and a lot of bruising. Oh, and a sprained wrist. They say that Erudite medicine they gave me speeds up healing."

"It does," he sighs, "but not enough to be much help to you in your fight tomorrow. I'll try to pair you with someone easy, but if Eric has anything to say about it…"

"And he _will_ have something to say about it," Zeke adds. Tobias grimaces. Zeke adds, "Speaking of our leaders, what did Max say?"

"I had to wait for him and Eric to finish a meeting before I spoke with him, which is what took so long." He and Zeke share a look, which I ignore. Right now I just want to know if anything will be done about Peter and the lemmings that follow him around. "Then I _tried_ to talk to Max, but as it was related to initiation, he sent me to Eric before I could even tell him what happened."

"So nothing is being done, then," Zeke spits out bitterly. Adeline's fussing gets louder and Landon joins in on the fun, too. Glancing at the clock, I notice that the twins' check-up will be in about fifteen minutes; the nurse said that she would send the doctor to my bed for the twins' visit.

I also see that it's about time for their bottles, so I reach for the diaper bag and Zeke hands it to me without even breaking eye contact with Tobias, let alone interrupting their conversation. I tap Tobias's arm and hand him a bottle after pointing at Landon. Unlike Zeke, Tobias does interrupt their conversation for a moment to give his son his full attention while he gets Landon settled in his arms and drinking from the bottle.

Tobias sighs. "Pretty much, yeah. I threatened to go back to Max and Eric conceded to adopting a 'three strikes, you're out' policy with the initiates. Since they aren't really dependents and also aren't members, there's sort of a grey area in the rule books. Of course Eric would side with a bully like Peter over a Stiff. I _will_ be going back to talk to Max about it, though. If nothing else, I want to be sure that incident by the Chasm is counted as a strike against Peter."

"This is our fault, Four. Because we're Eric's enemies, he's taking it out on my sister. I'm sorry, Tris."

"It's not your fault. It's just how it is. I'll be fine." Zeke and Tobias basically disregard my statement and go on to discuss how to basically not leave me alone ever. I feel like a child when they talk about me like this, I don't like it.

"You guys!" I hiss. "I can take care of myself!"

"Yeah, right, Beatrice," Zeke starts, "that's why-"

"Hey!" I interrupt. "Stop calling me Beatrice. That name is just so Abnegation. It's 'Tris' now, _Ezekiel._"

"Fine, sorry, sorry," Zeke says, raising his hands in surrender. "I will stop calling you Beatrice if you promise never to call me Ezekiel again."

"Deal."

"Tris Prior?" interrupts a man wearing a black lab coat and a stethoscope hung around his neck. He has a bright red mohawk and a spider tattoo on his forehead. Tobias immediately pulls his hand away from mine as I nod to answer the doctor, who offers his hand for me to shake. I awkwardly shake it, and he next shakes Zeke's and Tobias's hand.

"I'm Zeke, Tris's big brother," Zeke introduces himself.

The doctor raises an eyebrow as he shakes Tobias's hand. "I'm Four… Tris's instructor, and a friend of Zeke's," Tobias says uncomfortably.

"I'm Dr. Levy. And this must be Landon and Adeline. It looks like we have a six month well baby check-up today for each of them, and I will also check on your injuries, Tris, and hopefully clear you to leave the infirmary." I smile, relieved that I can get out of here soon.

Dr. Levy does all the usual check-up things with the twins, listening to their hearts and lungs, looking in their ears, and so on, and proclaims them both to be healthy. "Any concerns?" he asks.

Tobias nudges me discreetly and nods his head at Adeline. "Uh, Adeline's colic hasn't seemed to improve much. I thought it was supposed to get better."

Dr. Levy explains about the possibility that it could be related to an upset stomach and that maybe her food isn't agreeing with her. He suggests trying a different formula. He also gives instructions for starting solid food with both babies, but suggests waiting until we've worked out the possible formula issue with Adeline before giving her anything else. I notice that Tobias is listening intently to everything the doctor says.

When the doctor moves on from the twins to check me over, I wait for Zeke to be busy talking with Tobias and quietly ask for a birth control shot. The doctor nods in acknowledgement and tells me the nurse will administer it when she brings me the prescription pain relievers in a few minutes.

"So, are we ready to go?" Zeke asks after Dr. Levy leaves.

"Almost," I say, nervous about him being here and what I will say to the questions he asks me when they give me the shot. Just then the nurse comes back.

"Here are your pain relievers," she says. Her voice is loud and grating. So much for privacy. She swipes my arm with an alcohol swab and picks up the prepared syringe. "And here is your birth control shot," she adds as she pushes the needle into my flesh.

"Birth control shot?!" Zeke roars. Tobias's eyes go wide and he quickly takes a few steps away from my brother.

Damn it. "Zeke, you know I'm not a virgin. Obviously. If I did that in Abnegation, did you really think I wouldn't here in Dauntless?" I say, rolling my eyes.

Zeke just glares at Tobias. _If looks could kill…_

Tobias rubs the back of his neck like he always does when he is nervous or uncomfortable.

"One last thing," the nurse says. "We have been taking blood samples for Erudite's current medical research study on genetics." I feel Tobias stiffen beside me, and my stomach twists with a nervous feeling. Mom said divergence was genetic; this sounds dangerous to me. "It would be anonymous, we would just need a sample from each of the children and, preferably, both parents. Would you be willing to participate?"

"Um, I think they already did that at another appointment," I lie. "And since you can't get their father's blood sample, there would be no benefit to doing it again."

The nurse nods once. "Alright, you're all set then." Then she leaves, not bothering to close the curtain around my uncomfortable hospital cot. Tobias visibly relaxes.

"So… ready to go, Tris?" Tobias asks, standing.

"Yes, I am." He helps me up and we leave the infirmary. Tobias carries Landon and Zeke carries Adeline. "You always take Landon. You should carry Adeline sometimes too, you know."

"She doesn't like me," he grumbles.

I roll my eyes. "That's not true. She's just cranky. She's like that with everyone." He shrugs. We will have to talk about it more later, I guess.

Zeke just scowls the whole way to the dining hall. I know he is still stewing over the idea that I need birth control. We near the dining hall and I pull Tobias and Zeke to a stop.

"Look, Zeke offered up the two of you to watch the twins," I say to Tobias, then I look between them. "Are you guys sure you can handle being in the same room right now? Maybe I should just keep them with Uri and me."

Zeke huffs. "I'm fine, Tris. I can handle myself. Just go hang out with your friends."

I look to Tobias and he gives me a reassuring smile. I reluctantly concede; it _will_ be good for the two of them to spend some more time with the twins, especially Tobias. I think he just needs some more time with Adeline, without me there to rescue them, to figure out how to keep her happy. I needed that when I first brought her home; he needs to build that confidence, too.

"Okay, have fun, then," I smile, and after glancing around to be sure no one is here to witness it, I give Tobias a chaste kiss on the lips. Chaste, because my already angry big brother is standing right there. When I pull away, he is looking away from us, scowling once again. "Don't kill each other," I warn, then I turn and walk around the corner to meet my friends in the dining hall.


	14. Chapter 14

**ABNEGATION HELLIONS**

**CHAPTER 14**

**Four POV**

Zeke put Landon down in the bedroom after he fell asleep, but Adeline simply will not stop crying. I swear this baby _hates_ me. Tris says our daughter is just cranky, and yeah, she does cry with Tris and with Uriah, too, but they both can get her to calm down after a bit. Even Shauna can. But me? Nope. I am completely incapable of soothing her. I have fed her, burped her, changed her. I've let her crawl around ― she just sat there and sobbed. I even tried singing to her, and I have never sung in my life. I have walked her all around. She must be exhausted by now, but I don't see sleep coming for her anytime soon.

"I need a break," I say desperately to Zeke. "Can you take her for a few minutes?" He gives me the same pissed off look he has had on his face since the infirmary. "Please?"

Zeke sighs dramatically. "Fine." He doesn't get out of his chair so I go to him and gently settle Adeline in his arms.

"You might want to get up and walk around," I say. "Tris told me once that Adeline likes that. That was a few months ago, but it's probably still true. Didn't work for me, but nothing really does." I mutter the last part almost under my breath.

I walk to the bathroom and go inside. When I glance back at Zeke, he is glaring at me. I shut the bathroom door and sit on the toilet, on top of the closed lid.

This whole day has been a disaster. First, Tris falling out of the train; she is very lucky she wasn't hurt worse. The train doesn't slow down much there, and people can die being pushed from moving trains. That's probably exactly what Peter was hoping for.

Then Eric's response to the situation. I knew as soon as Max shooed me away without even listening that nothing would be done. Worse, Eric made it clear that my relationship with Tris was a major factor ― or his excuse, at least ― for providing more leniency with Peter and his little posse. He couldn't be sure that my retelling of the situation was entirely accurate, he said. I will try again to speak with Max tomorrow, but I have a sinking feeling that it won't do any good.

And then there's Zeke. When I have a chance to speak with Tris, I intend to ask her to complain about that nurse. It could look a little strange if I were the one to say something, as only the leaders know that I am Tris's boyfriend and the twins' father. I couldn't believe it when she practically shouted out the words "birth control shot." I can admit that my first reaction, for a split second there, was definitely positive. But then Zeke shouted and I knew exactly what I was in for.

Zeke is generally a fun, laid-back guy. You would be surprised, though, at how long he can hold a grudge… particularly when it involves one of his siblings.

When Zeke and I were nine years old, a couple of Candor boys at school were relentlessly teasing me for being friends with a "little girl." It was a few months after my mother died, and I was adjusting to my new life as Marcus's slave and personal punching bag. Maybe it was because he often told me to 'be a man,' usually when I cried. I hadn't learned to take the punches and whippings silently yet, and a few times I had cried over my mother's death.

Looking back, it is hard for me to fathom how I could have possibly given in to those boys' taunting. Beatrice was one of my best friends, second (barely) at the time to Ezekiel, and she understood me in a special way. She would often just sit with me ― right next to me, with our upper arms and our hips touching ― not saying anything, not even looking at me. She would just sit there and be with me, precisely when that was exactly what I needed in my grief for my mother. I never had to tell her to. She just knew. A couple of times, we weren't even together ― she was at home having dinner with her family, and I was sitting alone in the meadow. And suddenly Beatrice appeared beside me. She sat down beside me, shoulder to shoulder and hip to hip, and she reached over and took my hand in hers. Neither of us ever said a word that night. We just sat there watching the fading sunset turn to dusk, holding hands in the innocent way children do, for friendship and comfort.

Despite all that, I gave into the teasing and I began to ignore Beatrice anytime we were outside Abnegation. I refused to be seen walking with her when we reached school, and pretended not to hear her if she would greet me in the hall at school. The Candor boys laughed at the way tears gathered in her eyes, and I did nothing. Zeke defended his sister and glared at me.

After a few days, Tris was still trying to speak to me in the halls of the school. I was tired of the guilt that tugged at my heart every time I had to ignore her and I wished she would just stop trying. I was almost angry at her for being so persistent. And I snapped. I turned and yelled at her right there in the school hallway. I told her to stop annoying me, and couldn't she see that I wasn't going to answer her?

Beatrice cried. The Candor boys laughed hysterically. Ezekiel pushed me into the wall. I hung my head in total disappointment at myself.

I got my head out of my ass after that, and Beatrice and I made up a week later. But Ezekiel didn't speak to me for over a month, other than the two times he yelled at me.

I put my head in my hands and groan. Really, Zeke is being kind of ridiculous. Obviously Tris and I had sex in Abnegation, of course we would rekindle that part of our relationship in Dauntless. And we did, quickly after she arrived here. I really don't feel like playing silent treatment with him over this.

Suddenly I realize that the background noise my crying daughter has been providing us with has faded out. Did he actually get her to sleep?! See, like I said, that child hates me. She seems to like her uncles well enough, though.

I stand in front of the door and take a deep breath and let it out before turning the lock back. I need to hash it out with Zeke and make him see that he is being irrational. I turn the handle and walk back into the living room.

The room is empty. I sit down on the couch and wait, and after a minute Zeke comes back in. He sits back in his worn armchair- it reminds me of the ones we had back in Abnegation, except it's a faded black instead of light gray- and glares at me before he reaches for the remote control. We didn't have television in Abnegation, and I still don't have one. But when Shauna and Zeke moved in together last month, a television was one of her contributions to their newly shared apartment.

"So, how long are you going to give me the silent treatment this time, Ezekiel?" I ask lightly. He glares at me hearing his given name.

"Depends how long you keep pissing me off, _Tobias,_" he shoots back. I grit my teeth hearing him use my real name. I should have expected it when I used his first, though, so I don't comment. Instead, I just roll my eyes.

I lean forward, toward him, with my elbows on my knees. "Look, Zeke, I thought we were past you being pissed about Tris and me in general. Stop acting like a lower-levels child," I say bluntly.

Zeke glares. Then he rolls his eyes. "Fine," he says. "I don't like it, though. Let's just watch a movie or something."

I nod in agreement, and Zeke goes to the DVD shelf and debates between two of Shauna's movie discs before selecting a comedy.

**-oOo-**

By the time Tris and Uriah came for the baby twins, I was exhausted. How does she do this all the time? Even usually having Uriah's help… Adeline's crying is exhausting.

Then again, I don't think Adeline cries as long or as hard when her mommy and Uncle Uriah are with her. I can't help feeling a bit jealous.

At first I plan to go home, but instead, I end up finding myself standing at the railing to the Chasm. Since I'm already here, I decide to go down into the gulley. There is a path that leads down to the water. It blends so well into the rock walls of the ravine that if you don't know what you're looking for, it would be nearly impossible to notice. Zeke discovered it soon after our initiation, when he briefly dated a girl whose mother worked in Chasm Maintenance. He took Shauna and me down there to hang out, but we only did so a few times. In the past eight or nine months, I have only come here alone, when I want peace and quiet and a place to think ― or to just zone out and not think at all.

Zoning out is what I am here to do today. The white water of the chasm roars around me, drowning out the echoes of Adeline's wailing that still seems to ring in my ears almost an hour after I was separated from her. It also drowns out the sound of footsteps approaching, and I don't notice that I am no longer alone until Shauna appears beside me, dangling her feet off the edge of the large, flat rock I use as a seat.

Shauna bumps my shoulder with hers and smiles almost sadly when I look over at her. "Thought I'd find you here," she says.

"How did you know?" I didn't think she and Zeke knew that I still came down here.

She chuckles. "I'm more observant than you think. I've seen you disappear down here a couple of times, particularly when you first found out about the babies. Zeke told me it had been a rough day, so I went by your apartment, but you didn't answer. I figured you might be in a bit of a mood and would probably come here."

"Didn't know I was so predictable."

Shauna shrugs. "Only to those who know you well." Her words remind me, for the second time today, of how Tris has always known what I was feeling and just what I needed from her. For such a long time before things became romantic between us, she was the best friend I could possibly ask for. No one could ever compare with Beatrice, but Shauna came probably as close as anyone could to filling that void for me over this past year.

Sometimes you need a Zeke, someone who will brighten things up and make sure you don't take life too seriously ― though he has certainly failed in some of my most vulnerable moments, because they were some of his most vulnerable as well. But sometimes, you need a friend who will just be there, without trying to change your reality or make light of your troubles.

"Zeke told me about Tris getting that shot," Shauna says. She's trying to keep a straight face, but the corners of her mouth keep twitching upward.

I scrub my face with my hands and Shauna finally bursts out laughing. Her reaction is infectious and soon I find myself snickering and grinning, too. When I really think about it… it is kind of funny. "Let me guess, Zeke is still pissed and ranted to you about it."

"Yes, he ranted," she confirms, "but no, he's not mad. He and I talked, he's over it."

"He can't have seriously thought that Tris and I wouldn't continue our… um…" I wave my hand vaguely, not able to say the words aloud, "...once she got here."

"God, you Stiffs!" Shauna laughs. "You can say the word 'sex,' you know."

My cheeks heat up and I know I'm blushing. I shake my head.

Shauna rolls her eyes. "Well, you're right, he didn't actually think that. He just doesn't want to be reminded of it. She's his baby sister, after all."

"She's hardly a baby any more, Shauna. She is the mother of two children."

Shauna shrugs. "Lynn and Hector will always be my baby sister and brother. That's just how it is when you have siblings." I wouldn't know. But thinking about it makes me glad that Landon and Adeline will always have each other, just like Tris and Uriah do. "So how are things going with Tris here? Be honest," she warns sternly.

"This isn't Candor," I tease, and she hits me playfully on the shoulder. "The honest answer, huh?" Shauna nods and I think for a moment. "I don't know, Shauna," I say, hanging my head. "I thought- I thought once Tris got here everything would be _perfect, _you know? My life was gonna be perfect, I was going to have everything I always wanted. And don't get me wrong… I do love those babies. I don't really know them yet, but I do love them." I sigh and Shauna rubs my arm with her hand sympathetically.

The words continue to just spill from my lips. "Adeline never stops crying, especially when she's with _me. _Eric is out to get Tris because of his grudge against me and Zeke. Peter seems hellbent on killing her- and that isn't an exaggeration. Seriously, he pushed her off a moving train today. I barely get any time alone with her, Zeke is pissed off, Max won't listen to me and I don't know if I can protect her…" I stare down at the rapids just a couple of yards below and watch the mist attach more water droplets to my boots.

"Maybe she doesn't need you to protect her," Shauna suggests carefully. "Initiation only lasts a few weeks, and she knows how to take care of herself. Four, this is all going to be an adjustment for you. Give it time."

I groan. _Give it time._ I don't _want_ to give it more time, I want to finally _be_ with Tris. We had to hide in Abnegation, we were basically completely unable to see one another for an entire year, and now… now it's more _waiting_. "It's even harder now, you know? Waiting. She's _right there. _Standing in front of me all day. It's like someone is following me around with a piece of Dauntless cake and telling me I have to wait till tomorrow to eat it.

"And it's not only that. It's that we've had to hide, we've had to wait and wait, and with this asshole Peter after her, and Eric's bullshit… I feel like something really bad will happen to her. Like now when we are so close to what we have been waiting for, something will happen and it will all slip away from me forever. What if we never get our happily ever after?"

I don't come out and say what I'm _really_ feeling ― that I'm afraid. Shauna knows that I have only four fears, but she doesn't know that from the day I entered Dauntless as a new initiate, my worst fear has been losing Tris.

"She's got you to watch over her, Four. And her brothers, and me, and her friends. She'll be alright."

"She'd better be," I grumble. And then we sit by the Chasm together in silence for a long time.


	15. Chapter 15

**CHAPTER 15**

**Tris POV**

The injections of pain medication I was given in the infirmary yesterday have completely worn off, and the pain killer capsules they gave me at discharge are not nearly as effective. They are strong enough that I can nearly forget the dull ache in my sprained wrist (other than the awkward brace I am wearing), but the right side of my ribcage, pain sears through me with every breath. My instinct is to curl in around the source, but when I do, it only becomes more intense.

How the hell am I supposed to fight today?! I really hope that Eric doesn't get involved and Tobias can pair me with someone easy, ideally Myra, or at least against Uriah ― I know he would end the fight with as little damage as possible.

Al and I walk side by side to the training room. This morning when I came back from my shower, the word "stiff" was spray painted in bright red all over mine and Uriah's mattresses, pillows and bed frames, and there was Peter, whistling as he fluffed his pillow. Drew was peeking around the doorframe, shaking with that silent laugh of his. Peter denied either of them having anything to do with it, but I'm not an idiot. I know it was them.

Uriah had already taken the twins to the daycare for me; I don't think he has seen it yet. Without a word, Al helped me strip the sheets off both beds before he threw them in the trash.

"Nervous?" Al asks, glancing at me.

"Well, yeah," I reply. "Just breathing hurts, there's no way I can fight. But I have to."

"Maybe they'll let you concede this time."

I roll my eyes. "Eric is not going to let me concede, Al. You know that."

Al shrugs. "Maybe he won't be there today."

He will be. Of that I am certain. Eric is in charge of my scoring, so he has to be at all of my fights. But if I tell Al that he will ask questions, so I just say, "Maybe."

"You were badass when you fought Molly the other day, you know," Al says to me, grinning. "You had her down so fast, I think Four and Eric actually missed it. Who'd have thought a short little Abnegation transfer could do so much damage in just a minute or two?"

"Hey!" I protest at his condescending description of me. But I can't help smiling.

"No, seriously! Uriah was impressive, too. How did you two get so good at this while growing up in Abnegation? Aren't you supposed to spend your time like… helping factionless and..." he pauses. "What the hell do you _do_ in Abnegation, anyway?"

I roll my eyes. "Nothing fun. Anyway, Uriah and I were never really all that Abnegation. We always knew we'd come here." Then I change the subject. "How about you? I bet you're feeling pretty confident after your win yesterday."

Al lets out a heavy sigh, and I raise my eyebrows at him. "Oh, come on!" I say. "Aren't you proud of your win? Everyone will remember that; if you keep it up, they won't mess with you." I suppose they probably wouldn't anyway. He has his size on his side.

Al snorts. "Yeah, I'll be remembered as the first guy to knock someone out cold." He sounds tired… ashamed, actually.

"There are worse ways to be remembered, Al," I assure him.

"There are better ways too, first jumper." He shoves me playfully, sending a jolt of pain throughout my body, and I suck in air between my clenched teeth. "Oh my god, Tris! Shit, I'm sorry. I forgot."

"It's fine, Al," I grit out. "Just… don't do it again, please." He nods dumbly.

We pass the training room that the Dauntless-born initiates are training in, and Marlene waves at me, wearing her usual friendly smile. What surprises me is that Lynn sends a half-smile my way as well. She almost always has a scowl on her face. I guess the time we spent last night all hanging out together must have started to win her over.

When I got to the dining hall last night, at first it was hard to enjoy myself; I was nervous about having let Zeke and Tobias take the babies. They may be the twins' uncle and father, but neither of them have any experience at all with infants. Soon I decided that unless I heard otherwise, I would assume that my babies were just fine, and I joined in on the fun.

Everyone was angry that nothing was really being done about Peter, although the Dauntless-borns looked like they expected the news. When I told them that Four was going to try again to talk to Max, Al expressed his surprise that Four would go to the trouble. He even called Tobias an "emotionless robot," which had me clenching my fists under the table.

To my surprise, it was Lynn that spoke up. "Four may be tough, but he's loyal, and Tris's brother is his best friend," she said. Then she added with a smirk, "Besides, he's probably afraid that if Peter kills Tris, Zeke might end up with the babies and then Shauna would definitely rope him into babysitting." We all laughed.

"Four rocking a baby to sleep," Will had said with a deep belly laugh. "That's a ridiculous image."

"I don't know," I defended, remembering him standing and rocking Landon at Zeke's the other night, "the image in my mind is pretty cute."

"Yeah," Christina had said with a dreamy smile that made my fists clench again under the table. "That's _definitely_ a cute image."

We enter the training room and I stop when I see Christina. She is standing very close to Tobias, who takes little steps back here and there to maintain some personal space. I notice how she bats her eyelashes (how cliche is that?) and fiddles with her earring. Christina's body language is obvious. She is interested. She is flirting with him. With _my_ Tobias!

I clench my teeth and glare toward them. Uriah appears beside me, wrapping his arm around my shoulders. "Chill, Tris," he says loud enough for only me to hear. "She doesn't know about you two, and he isn't flirting back." I watch and see that he is right. Tobias tries to maintain the distance between them, and he is staring Christina down as she speaks with the face that inspired Al's assessment of 'emotionless robot'. Tobias says something to her and she reluctantly goes back to Will, who has now been joined by Al, and Uriah and I walk over to meet them.

I have barely greeted my friends when Tobias calls out, "Tris," his voice deep and serious, and waves me toward him with his hand.

I smile apologetically at Christina and Will and walk across the training room to Tobias.

"Hey," Tobias says softly. "How are you feeling this morning?" His arms are crossed over his chest, but his body is relaxed and he stands less than a foot away from me.

"Like someone threw me off a train," I joke as I look up at him, but Tobias frowns. I sigh. "I won't lie, my rib cage really hurts. But I know I have to deal with it."

Tobias frowns, but nods, and runs his fingers through his hair. "Look, I wanted to let you know… Eric told me he already talked to Peter. I wanted to do that myself, I don't trust Eric to care enough to get the message across. I can't really go after him, because of this whole instructor situation, but I'll figure something out. Zeke might be planning something anyway."

"You don't need to do that," I insist. "I'll just stay near my friends."

Tobias sighs and glares across the room at Peter. "We'll talk about that later, okay? Anyway, I'm about to write the pairings up on the chalkboard. Believe me, I tried, and I argued with him about it longer than I should have, but Eric wouldn't let me pair you against Myra." Myra is the only one that would be an easy fight with how I'm feeling today. "You had better get back to your friends."

I nod and thank him, then go back to Uriah, who is talking with Christina, Will and Al. Tobias picks up a clipboard and starts copying the fight pairings onto the chalkboard.

"What did Handsome-but-Broody want?" Christina asks. I detect a bit of an edge in her voice.

I shrug. "Just checking on me after that fall yesterday and letting me know that Eric spoke with Peter about, you know, trying to kill me."

I watch Tobias write on the chalkboard. I will be fighting Drew today. He is the easiest of Peter's little gang, but this still seems impossible.. Christina lights up when she sees her name. "Oh, thank goodness! I only have to fight Myra today," she sighs happily. She looks at me. "Drew isn't too bad, if you can beat Molly, you can beat Drew."

"Broken ribs and a sprained wrist, Christina," I remind her. But my mind flashes back to seeing Drew a few minutes ago, silently snickering in the doorway to the dormitory, and I want to beat the crap out of him.

"Oh, right."

"At least I don't have to fight one of my friends today," Al says with a half-smile. He will fight third, against Peter. I see that Uriah will fight Edward, and Will against Molly.

Eric saunters into the room, already yelling the moment his foot hits the wood floor. "Myra and Christina! In the ring!" he shouts, and Christina hurries over to the mat and she and Myra square off. Their fight is as boring as I expected, and Christina knocks Myra out in under a minute.

Christina and Myra are followed by Uriah and Edward. A few days ago, Will told me that Edward has been studying hand-to-hand combat since he was ten years old. He could definitely give Uriah a challenge.

I am pleasantly surprised; the few extra training sessions with Tobias these past months have paid off. Uriah does not come out unscathed, but when he knocks Edward unconscious, Uriah hasn't even sustained enough damage for Four to insist that he visit the infirmary. My brother leaves the mat with a slight limp, a cut lip and a bruised jaw, but he smirks at me as he sits down beside me again. But as Uriah ended his fight and Eric proclaimed him winner, my attention was drawn not to my brother, but to Peter, Drew and Molly across the room. The jealousy and hatred in Peter's eyes is obvious as he glares at Uriah, and his minions follow suit. Suddenly I am less concerned about Peter coming after me, and more worried that he and his little gang might go after Uriah next, instead.

Al is up next; I see Peter eagerly making his way to the ring. Peter is the kind of sadistic bastard who actually enjoys this. I briefly squeeze Al's forearm in encouragement. "Defend my honor, will ya?" I joke.

"I don't like beating people up for no reason, Tris," he says quietly, and I blush, feeling badly for my comment. But then Al faces me, walking backwards toward the fighting mat. "But this time, I have a reason." He winks before he turns around to enter the ring and I stand there, stunned.

My eyes quickly dart to Tobias. He is scowling at the pair in the ring. Both of them. I study Peter's fighting technique; a fight with him is inevitable. Whether I am ever paired against him in training or not, it will happen eventually, and anything I can learn about his strengths and weaknesses will be useful.

Peter and Al fight. Peter is more skilled, and he is faster, and he is big. But Al is bigger and more powerful, and his biggest downfall is his kind nature. That weakness isn't in play today, though, because this time, Al _wants_ to hurt the person in front of him. I can't even begin to guess who will win this fight.

Peter throws the first punch, narrowly missing as Al dodges to his left. I remember that Peter fought against Uriah the other day, too, and I scoot closer to my brother.

"Did Peter make the first move in your fight with him, too?" I whisper, keeping my eyes on Peter and Al. They trade punches and kicks, Al taking more punches than Peter, but Al is hardy and Peter never manages to make contact with Al's skull.

"Yeah," Uriah says, smirking at me. "Studying his technique huh?" I nod and Uri throws his arm over my shoulders. "Smart."

"He steps before he punches," I observe after watching for another minute.

Uriah nods. "Look," he says, pointing with one finger, "his position was right at first, but as he gets winded, he's dropping his arms." I smile at Uriah and nod.

Peter swipes Al's feet out from under him, knocking Al to the ground, and quickly kicks Al in the stomach. He says something I cannot hear just before he goes to kick a second time and Al moves more quickly than I thought him capable of, grabbing Peter's leg and pulling him down with a roar. Before I know it, Al is straddling Peter, using his knees to pin down Peter's arms. Al delivers a powerful blow to Peter's temple and I watch the tension disappear from Peter's body as he goes boneless, limp, unconscious.

"Well done, Al," Eric says, smirking, as Four circles Al's name on the board. "Next up, Drew and Tris."

Despite the oral pain medications I took this morning, my torso screams with pain with every movement.

I can't do this. I want to beat Drew to a pulp, but I can't.

So I take a risk.

Instead of going to the mat, I slowly make my way to where Tobias and Eric stand. I don't bother addressing Tobias, all three of us know who holds the power here.

"Eric?" I say nervously. "Is there any way I can just forfeit this match? I was pushed out of a train less than twenty-four hours ago and my ribs are fractured-"

"Sure, you can forfeit, Tris," Eric says, but his tone sounds too kind to be genuine. I wait for him to continue, because I just know that he will. Tobias knows it too; his demeanor is carefully guarded, a practiced sort of casual, but I know him too well not to notice the warning in his eyes and the tension in his jaw. "You can always forfeit… if you want to quit initiation and become factionless, that is." I feel something inside me deflate. I knew better. I knew he wouldn't let me out of it so easily.

"No, sir. I want to continue initiation." I force myself to stand with an aura of strength that I don't feel inside, and Eric nods.

"In the ring, then, Stiff."

I step barefoot onto the mat at the center of the room, where Drew is already waiting. He is guarding his face well enough, but holds his left hand too high, leaving his stomach exposed. I saw him fight the other day. He would be an easy opponent for me, if I thought I could actually throw a punch right now.

He doesn't waste any time throwing the first punch, and I twist out of the way, yelping as pain sears through the right side of my torso. I grit my teeth and throw a punch with my left hand, growling through gritted teeth as my fist connects with his stomach and sends shockwaves through my body; this is unbearable. And based on Drew's reaction, I hit him with about half my usual force.

Distracted by the excruciating pain I am already in, I don't see it coming. He sweeps my legs out from under me and I land hard on the mat, and even worse, on my right side. I whimper and his foot connects with my sternum. White-hot pain rips through me and I hear someone screaming, but I am too focused on the black dots obscuring my vision to try and figure out where it is coming from. Maybe I should, though, to distract myself from the anguish I am in, and whatever it is that is happening to my vision. I listen to it, I feel the reverberations in my chest.

Oh. I'm the one screaming. And I can't seem to stop.

_On your feet, on your feet._

I try to roll to my knees but a fresh wave of pain disorients me. Drew's foot collides with me again and my arms give out, I am face down on the mat. Something collides with my head and through the fuzzy black dots swimming before my eyes, I see the anguish in Tobias's face. I want to get to him, _need_ to reach him. And that is my last thought before the world goes black and everything around me goes still and silent.


	16. Chapter 16

_Almost forgot to update today! I keep meaning to mention that seems to no longer be sending out email notifications when you receive a private message. A few readers of this story or Count On Me probably have messages from me that you haven't seen from forever ago... it's also why I am not responding to reviews much anymore, because people don't seem to get the messages. Anyway, just an FYI in case you haven't checked your inbox in a long time._

_I'm working on an update for COM. If I give you a time estimate I'll probably jinx it but just know I haven't abandoned or forgotten it._

* * *

**CHAPTER SIXTEEN**

**Uriah POV**

"Enough!" Four yells. When did he come back in here? He walked out a minute ago, and I felt like walking away too, it was just so hard to see Beatrice getting her ass kicked like that. Especially knowing what she's capable of. But he must have come back, and thank goodness he did — I don't know how much more injury Eric would have allowed before finally calling Drew off of her. That pansycake must be sadistic to have continued as long as he did in the first place.

Tris lies unconscious and bloody on the mat. Al tries to get up and go to her, but I glare at him and he sits back down. My left leg hurts from my own fight — I think I strained a muscle, it's nothing serious — so I limp on my way there, and Four gets to her first. He's about to pick her up but I stop him. "It's okay, Four, I got her." I can tell he wants to be the one to take her to the infirmary, but they're trying to keep their whole..._thing_...on the down low, so I give him a meaningful look and he backs off.

"Will and Molly," Four calls. It's the last thing I hear from the training room as I pass through the doors. I carry Tris bridal style on my way to the infirmary, thinking that I'm already way too familiar with that place. I am almost there when I see Marlene coming toward me. Her ponytail is messy and there's a fresh bruise on her cheek, still red, but a smile lights up her beautiful face. I definitely notice the way her black tank top and shorts — _short_ shorts — hug her body in all the right places and I wish I had come up behind her, instead, because she's got a really cute butt.

"Uriah!" she calls. I love how bright her eyes always are — they're green, like emeralds — and how she's the kind of person that just always makes you feel like seeing you made her day. Of course I always hope that it's _me_ specifically that makes her so happy, but she is friendly with everyone so I don't want to assume.

"Hey, Marlene," I say. I sound really cheerful, and I realize as soon as the words come out that it's probably inappropriate to act so happy while I'm carrying my unconscious sister to the infirmary. Wasn't I angry just a minute ago?

"Oh no! They made her fight?! Ugh, I can't stand Eric."

I smile at her sadly and nod. "Yeah, I'm sure that Four would have at least put her against Myra, but Eric had her fighting one of Peter's groupies." Marlene nods sympathetically and puts her hand on my bicep. My skin feels all tingly where we touch.

"Are you done for the day?" I ask. "Because we could hang out after I get Tris settled at the infirmary… I mean, if you want…" Oh no, my ears are getting hot. I swear, when I'm around Marlene I blush almost as much as Tris does.

"Yeah, I'd like that," Marlene very quickly agrees, and we walk together to the infirmary. The same nurse — the one that was here yesterday, with the purple hair and a face full of metal — sees us and directs me to an empty bed with a sigh. She shakes her head and grumbles something about that she can't believe they made that poor girl fight today.

"I can't guess how soon she will wake up, and she will definitely have to stay for at least most of this evening," she informs us. "The doctor will check her over more thoroughly soon. You can wait if you like, but you could be sitting for a while."

It's almost five o'clock now. When I notice how late it is, I curse under my breath. "Don't worry, she'll be okay," Marlene reassures me while she rubs her hand up and down my arm. I was pretty sure Tris would be fine anyway, because if Four thought otherwise, I'd have known it. I'm sure he has seen plenty of people get knocked out. But I almost want to pretend that Marlene guessed correctly about why I was upset, because it's giving her a reason to make physical contact and I really want that to continue. She wraps her arms around me for a hug. Yeah, I definitely like this.

But I have things to take care of. "Well, um, actually... I was just realizing that Tris won't be out of here to get the twins from daycare." I give her my very best puppy dog eyes. "Would you be okay with the babies tagging along with us? I still really want to hang out, I just really have to take care of the twins for Tris."

"Sure, I understand, I'll help you." She bats her eyelashes and I'm blown away at how bold the next thing she says is. "You know, if Tris wasn't your sister, I'd be really jealous of the way you dote on her."

My neck and ears are getting too warm again. Damn it, I'm blushing. Again. Blushing has always been Tris's tell, never mine. Is this some new twin thing? I don't like it. "Sorry, I hope it doesn't bother you too much. Tris and I have always taken care of each other, and I'm the only person that knows the babies well other than her. But we can see if Zeke is free or—" I stop short. Shit, I almost mentioned Four.

"...or?" Marlene asks with her eyebrows arching.

"Uh… or Shauna," I save, I hope I was quick enough to be believable. Hopefully Mar will think I just forgot Shauna's name for a second.

Marlene looks at me for a second then she shrugs and shakes her head. "No, Shauna's out at the fence the next couple days."

"Oh."

"It's not a problem, though!" Marlene chirps. "I don't mind, Uriah. Really."

**-oOo-**

"I won! I won!" Marlene mocks, laughing hysterically. "Man, you were practically doing a touchdown dance over your supposed flush, when you had two diamonds in with your three hearts!"

"Shut up," I say, starting to chuckle against my will. I can't help it— when she laughs I just want to join in. Besides, it was pretty funny. "They were all red… You know I've never played poker before! We didn't even have a deck of cards." Marlene rolls her eyes. I know she thinks some of the customs representing Abnegation's overzealous selflessness are ridiculous, and honestly, I agree with her. "And what's a touchdown?"

Marlene bursts out laughing all over again, and I have to wait for her to let me in on the joke. It's annoying, but not knowing this stuff is a part of growing up in Abnegation. While I never fit in there, I am more than thankful to Mom and Dad for taking Zeke and me in and treating us as their own.

The only other person in the transfer dorm is Myra. Her fight with Christina was a quick one, and Myra had been released from the infirmary as soon as she woke up. I guess she was still needing to recover a bit more, because she's asleep. The babies are both sleeping, too, and Marlene has been teaching me card games. Tris will be so excited when she finds out that Marlene bought Adeline a pacifier that she actually likes. Mar said that this was the only kind her nephew liked, so she thought we should try it. Shauna must have told her about Tris trying all those different pacifiers that Adeline wanted nothing to do with.

Marlene finally stops laughing and answers my question. "A touchdown is a goal in a game called football. The Dauntless play it occasionally. It's pretty rough — very Dauntless," she says, still smiling. God, I love her smile. I realize I'm staring at her lips and look back at her eyes.

"I guess there's a lot I missed out on, growing up in Abnegation," I shrug.

Marlene smirks, and there I am staring at her lips again. "What else did you miss out on? Not as _adventurous_ as your sister?"

I can feel my whole face heat up. "Uh, no. I mean, I might have been, but no one was that special. Besides, the only girl I knew who was '_adventurous'_ was Beatrice," I say rolling my eyes. "But I'm Dauntless now…"

"Maybe you'll find someone special here, then," Marlene says carefully. I may have been raised in Abnegation, but even I know what she's doing here.

"Maybe I already have," I say softly, leaning closer to her. She leans in closer, too, and this time I catch her looking at _my_ lips. Even though I'm nervous, it's all the invitation I need to close the distance between us.

I barely brush her lips with mine. They're so soft and I feel almost like this electric current, like I do whenever I touch Marlene but this time it's stronger, it can't be ignored. I pull back just a few inches and she smiles at me. I guess that means she liked it, too, and I definitely want more. So I lean in again, feeling much more confident than before and it's like that weird energy spreads throughout my body. We tilt our heads opposite directions and Marlene tangles her fingers in my hair, her opposite hand resting on my chest. I didn't think I would know what to do when this moment arrived, but it all happens naturally: my left hand automatically wraps around her to press on the small of her back, and my right has found its way to her hip.

Just as she begins to kiss me back harder, we are interrupted by a throat clearing. I pull away slowly and look toward the door, and there stands Four.

"Sorry to interrupt," he says as he walks over to us, not looking directly at us. "I just need to talk to Uriah for a minute."

"Sorry, Mar," I say, smiling at her as I stand up. "I should be back in a minute." I'm sure this is about Tris. Four gazes at the babies in their cribs for a couple seconds and then he turns and walks to the door, gesturing for me to follow him. When we get out to the hall he turns to me.

"I don't suppose you're here to take care of your children," I state, raising an eyebrow at him.

Four rubs the nape of his neck. "Uh, no, I'm sorry. I don't know how to do that by myself, and it would raise suspicion if I was walking through the compound carrying them, anyway. Look, can you take care of them tonight?"

I can, and I will, but I had hoped that Tris wasn't in bad enough shape to stay overnight in the infirmary. "Yeah, is my sister OK?"

Four nods. "She will be. I'm going to get her from the infirmary now. I just thought maybe it would be best if she got a really good night's sleep. I was going to take her back to my place." I wish Marlene and I could be alone, but I have to admit that his plan makes sense. Tris's body has had a traumatic couple of days and good sleep is probably the best thing right now. "They gave her more of Erudite's healing serum. I'm hoping she will be a lot better tomorrow. The fight today set back healing a bit."

"No new injuries, though?" Marlene may have distracted me quite well, but I really am worried about my sister.

"No," Four shakes his head, "nothing serious. Just a few bruises and a minor concussion. Her nose isn't even broken — just broke some blood vessels and caused the bloody nose. Luckily Drew isn't a great fighter. She would have mopped the floor with him had she not been injured just yesterday."

"Oh, I know she would." I glance at the door; I really want to get back to Marlene, because I was enjoying myself. "Okay, well, I'll take care of the twins tonight. You take care of Beatrice."

Four and I fist bump. "Have fun with Mar," he smirks while wagging his eyebrows. Then, more seriously, "Just make sure you give your niece and nephew enough attention, too."

"I will," I promise, then I go back into the dormitory.

"What did Four want?" Marlene asks.

"Just telling me how Tris was and making sure I could take care of the twins. She'll be fine, just needs good rest tonight." I sit next to Marlene on the bed again, almost close enough that our legs touch, but not quite. I didn't think that through. I wanted to be near her, but now I'm so close I can hardly stand that I'm not touching her. I want to go back to what we were doing before, but I'm not really sure how this whole romance thing works. The Abnegation never set much of an example for me, considering they don't even hold hands in public.

Marlene says just what I'm thinking: "Four sure knows how to ruin an amazing moment, doesn't he?" Her cheeks turn pink and she looks away.

"Yeah," I mumble. _Must be payback. _I remember the couple of times I interrupted Tobias kissing my sister… and how embarrassed they both were. Honestly, so was I.

"What?" Marlene asks, looking confused. Shit, I didn't mean to say that out loud.

"N-nothing," I say quickly.

"It sounded like—"

"Seriously, Mar, I don't want to talk about Four," I say desperately. She narrows her eyes and I just smile. "Think we could… pick up where we left off?" The need to distract her is making me bolder, I guess. Which is probably a good thing.

Marlene grins. "Hell yes."

But just as my lips touch hers, we are interrupted by a whimper from Landon's crib. "Damn it, Landon," I mutter under my breath, and Marlene laughs. _Are all the Eatons conspiring against me? Maybe in a minute, Adeline can wake up and join in on the fun, _I think sarcastically.

"I'll check on him," she says, and kisses my cheek, which makes me smile. I love that she jumps right in to help me, even though it isn't her responsibility. The twins will always be a big part of my life, and I really like Marlene and hope she will be, too, so this is good. Really good. She goes to the crib and leans in. "Hey, buddy! What's the matter? Are you missing your mommy?" She lifts Landon out of the crib, and he's just staring at her down. Like father, like son. It's kind of hilarious seeing that expression on a six month old. "She's not here but…" Marlene just stops, mid-sentence. She looks at Landon, then at me and I see how wide her eyes are. "Oh my god!"

"What?" I ask, my heart pounding, even though I know _exactly_ what that look was for. Honestly, it's amazing that it has taken this long for someone to notice the resemblance.

"You _did_ say something about payback a minute ago, didn't you?!" she exclaims. "He looks _just like Four._" _Oh shit!_

"Keep your voice down!" I hiss, glancing frantically across the room at Myra, who seems to still be sound asleep. "Myra could wake up, or someone could be outside that door right now! We need to let them share that information when _they_ are ready. Okay?"

Marlene slowly nods, her eyes still round as saucers. Landon chews on her finger, and I dig through the twins' bag for a bottle of water and a can of formula. "No wonder Four wouldn't even _look_ at any girls here in Dauntless. Honestly, I was starting to wonder if he was gay, though Lynn insisted he wasn't. I didn't even know he was from—"

"Seriously, please, Mar," I beg. "Not here."

Marlene sighs. "I'm sorry," she whispers. "I just can't believe I didn't see it."

"It's okay." I finish mixing the formula and hand Marlene the bottle. She begins to feed Landon, which is basically just holding him in one arm, now that he can hold his own bottle. "I'll tell you a little more some other time, someplace else." I won't be able to tell her a lot, I need to respect my sister's privacy. But I do trust Marlene. Still, we definitely shouldn't talk about this here in the dormitory. So I deal the cards and we start playing one of the games she taught me tonight.

**-oOo-**

**Tobias POV**

"Tris. Tris, come on, try to focus. We need to get to the apartment." Tris keeps getting distracted and stopping, and when she _is_ moving, she sways and stumbles. I don't know what the hell they gave her this time, but she seems to be very sensitive to whatever this pain medication is, or maybe they gave her more than last time. Maybe it's worse because of her (supposedly very minor) concussion. All I know is, Tris is acting like a lunatic.

"But it's so hard to walk when the ground is moving," Tris says innocently. I think this is going to be a long night. I'm starting to seriously wonder whether Zeke could have given her peace serum as a prank or something, though I don't know how he would even get the stuff.

I sigh and scoop Tris up in my arms, and as she babbles some nonsense about the blue lamps in the Dauntless hallways, I carry her to my apartment with my right arm behind her back and my left under her knees. I glance around at every corner, praying I won't run into anyone I know, particularly any of the initiates.

Tris runs her hand up and down my bicep. "You must work out a _lot_," Tris drawls, drawing out the vowel in the last word. "You're so strong." I smirk. She leans close; I shiver feeling her breath on my ear, although I wish she wouldn't twist that way, it sure won't help her still-healing ribs. "You're really sexy," she whispers. My smirk widens to a full grin.

I remember where we are and just as I begin to remind her, she cuts me off with her lips on mine. I barely kiss back before pulling away. She frowns. "That was lame. Okay, no it wasn't, but—" I pull her knees higher so I can reach her lips with my fingers, stopping her from talking any more. Or kissing me right there in the hallway. _But I really do want to kiss her._ All day, every day, seeing her in training looking so strong and Dauntless… really… looks good on her.

"We're here!" Tris cheers against my fingers as I stop in front of my door. I set her back on her feet so I can get to my keys. She sways and giggles. This is not _my_ Tris. I hate that I haven't been able to protect her. But for now, this is the time I have with her, so I will make the most of it.

"You know, when you act like Four, you're kind of scary," Tris says thoughtfully, out of the blue. _She's scared of me?_ The thought makes my stomach clench and I feel my face contort. Tris mimics me. "Why did you make that face? It doesn't feel very good." She stumbles toward the kitchen table, and I gently grab her shoulders and begin to steer her toward the bed. She needs to sleep off whatever the hell they gave her today.

"You're afraid of me?" I ask, trying not to sound as upset as I am.

"No," Tris says, looking confused. I relax my tense shoulders, relieved. "Why would I be afraid of you?"

"You just said Four was scary."

"Oh. Four is _so_ sexy though, too." Tris turns as she says this and runs her hands up my chest, ending with them wrapped around me, resting on the back of my neck. She is extremely uncoordinated tonight and ends up tangling her feet with mine, tripping me. We both fall onto the bed; I barely manage to maneuver away from her. She certainly does not need me falling on her injured ribs, I must be twice her weight.

Tris giggles hysterically, but doesn't remove her hands from around my neck. If anything, she holds on tighter. She kisses me sloppily and nips at my lower lip. _What do I do?_ Tris isn't in her right mind, so it feels as though I am taking advantage if I go along with this. Then again, if she were her usual self — and I really wish she were — this is probably what we would be doing anyway, right? Yes, right. So I'll go with it.

We spend a while making out, her hands roaming my body. I am very careful about where I let mine wander, not so much because of her inebriated state, but because of her injuries. When she pulls away to yawn, I decide it is time to put her to bed.

Tris goes back in for another kiss, but I don't kiss back. "Tris," I say against her lips. "Tris, you're tired." She pulls back to look at me with her lip jutted out in a pout. I internally groan, wanting nothing more than to bite that lip. "You are injured. You need plenty of sleep so that your body can heal."

"I don't want to sleep," she yawns. I hold back a laugh. "I just want to kiss you some more."

And she tries to, again, but I stop her with my fingers over her lips. "I am not going to kiss you, Tris. You need to rest."

I roll off the bed and unwrap her ribs to check on the bruising, and she keeps pouting but lets me. I cringe at the greens and yellows discoloring her skin, but note that the bruises are fading quickly; the Erudite healing serum is doing its job well. Since she seems to clearly be on plenty of painkillers, I decide this would be a good time to check her ribcage more thoroughly. She barely reacts when I press my fingers over the bones, but it's hard to tell if that's because it's healing so quickly or she is just that numb due to the painkillers. I don't bother with her wrist; the doctor said she could go back to normal activity with that hand tomorrow. The bump on her head doesn't seem to have swollen any further, either.

Satisfied that she is alright medically, I try to get her into one of my t-shirts to sleep in, but she insists on leaving it off and sleeping in her underwear. _Is she trying to kill me?!_ I know I need to keep hands off tonight and let her body heal.

I tuck her in and start to walk away from the bed. "Aren't you going to sleep with me?" Tris says, her voice sounding small and sad. I pause and look back at her. I can't say no, can't even delay it, looking in those wide, round eyes.

"Of course I am," I say gently. "I'm just going to use the bathroom first."

"Promise?"

"I promise."

I use the bathroom and brush my teeth, and when I come out Tris looks like she's asleep. But I promised I would come lay with her once I got out, so I do. I quickly change into my sleep pants, not bothering to wear a shirt, and climb into bed. Tris is laying on her uninjured left side. I carefully slide my left arm under her neck and wrap my right around her waist, again avoiding her ribs, and cuddle up to her with my chest against her back.

"Mmmm," Tris hums sleepily. "I love you, Tobias."

"I love you too, Tris," I whisper, breathing in the honey and apples smell of her hair. Holding her feels so right. I drift off to sleep with a smile on my face.


	17. Chapter 17

**CHAPTER SEVENTEEN**

**Tris POV**

I stand with the other transfers in a line facing the row of targets on the wall. We watch as Tobias demonstrates his throwing stance and throws the knife flawlessly, sticking it to the very center of the bullseye. We have completed our third and fourth days of fighting and are now learning to throw knives.

The morning after my disastrous fight with Drew, I awoke in Tobias's room shocked at how well the two additional doses of Erudite's healing serum had worked. I was still bruised, but most movements didn't even hurt and those that did, such as twisting, were manageable and did not prevent me from winning my fights against Will that day and Al yesterday. It felt awful to fight my own friends and I tried to hurt them as little as I could while still winning each match.

Tobias throws again, and the second knife sticks millimeters away from the first. I see Christina just past Tobias. Our eyes meet and hers narrow. I frown. I wish I knew why Christina has been so cold to me the past few days. She's barely spoken to me and I keep catching her glaring at me. At capture the flag last night, she argued with everything I said even though my ideas really were good. In fact, it was my strategy that won the game for our team.

When Eric tells us to begin, I pick up my first knife and balance it between my fingers. The weight and shape are slightly different from the ones I have practiced with. Uriah throws and hits the target with the knife, but it doesn't stick. I smirk as I practice my throw a few times without releasing the knife, just to get a feel for the new weapon.

"Hey, Stiff," Peter sneers from the other side of Uriah. "Remember what a knife is?"

I keep my eyes on the target and when I draw my arm forward again, I release the knife. I am the first initiate to hit the target and make it stick. It isn't in the bullseye, but it stuck in the inner circle.

"Hey Peter," I taunt, "remember what a Target is?" Peter glares at me, then narrows his eyes at my knife sticking out of the wood.

"Careful, Tris," Uriah says quietly. I deflate, knowing I shouldn't be drawing any extra attention to my skill, especially from Peter.

After a half-hour, everyone has hit the target but Al, and unfortunately, the loud clunking sound Al's knives make as they hit the floor catch Eric's attention. That's an especially bad thing today, because Eric seems to be in a terrible mood, possibly from his loss last night at Capture the Flag. Tobias told me that Eric was on the losing team during their initiation last year, too.

When Al misses again, Eric taunts him, which only makes Al more nervous. His next knife hits the wall, feet away from the target.

"What was that, initiate?" Eric says, his voice dangerously quiet.

"It – it slipped," Al says.

"Well, I think you should go get it." Eric notices that everyone has stopped throwing. "Did I tell you to stop?" Everyone begins throwing again all at once. We have never seen Eric look quite this deadly.

"But everyone's still throwing!"

"So? Are you afraid?"

"Of getting stabbed by an airborne knife? Yes, I am!" Al exclaims. I cringe. Refusal is one thing; Eric might have respected his stubbornness, might have though it brave. But admitting his fear is a mistake.

"Everyone stop!" Eric yells. In a fraction of a second, the room falls silent and still. He turns back to Al. "You. Stand in front of the target."

Al does as he's told this time, visibly shaking.

Eric keeps his cold eyes narrowed at Al. "Hey, Four, give me a hand over here will you? Four is going to throw knives at that target until you learn not to flinch."

The tension I make out in Tobias's shoulders, in the way he clenches his jaw, makes me even more nervous than before. He and Eric argue for a moment, but ultimately, Eric holds the authority and Tobias picks up three knives and takes his position facing Al. Al is so big that not much of the target behind him is visible, and he is shaking like a leaf.

I see the terror in Al's eyes as Tobias raises his arm, preparing to throw… I can't stand this!

"Stop!" The word leaves my mouth before I have time to think it through. In an instant, all eyes are on me. But I don't really notice them. I don't even look at Eric.

I only look at Tobias. I see the warning, the panic, the fury in them, but I have already spoken. It's too late to back down now, and to be honest, I don't want to.

"Any idiot can stand in front of a target," I say, looking away from Tobias now and at Eric instead. "It doesn't prove anything except that you're bullying us. Which, as I recall, is a sign of _cowardice_."

Eric's lips pull wide into a menacing grin and I suppress the urge to shudder. "Then it should be easy for you to take his place."

Defiantly, I make my way to the target. Al squeezes my arm as he passes me. I stand in front of the target that Al nearly covered; the top of my head barely meets the center bullseye.

I look straight ahead and meet Tobias's eyes. He shifts and plays with the knife in his fingers and I think he's about to prepare to throw the first knife, but he doesn't. He drops his arm at his side and turns to glare at Eric.

"No," Tobias says in a low voice.

"Excuse me?" Eric scoffs, eyebrows raised.

"I won't throw knives at Tris."

They stare each other down for a minute and the tension is so thick, no one dares to breathe. Then Eric smirks.

"Fine," Eric says lightly. "I'll give you a choice. Either you throw the knives, or I do." Eric raises an eyebrow in challenge; I silently pray that Tobias will throw the knives. I know his aim is impeccable, and I know he would never willingly hurt me. Eric, on the other hand…

Without a word, Tobias shifts his feet to shoulder width apart and raises his arm to throw the knife.

The first lands a few inches from my left hip and I close my eyes in relief.

"Eyes open, Stiff," Tobias barks, and I do.

I feel the wind from the second knife as it imbeds itself an inch or two above my head. Eric grunts and Tobias's eyes dart to him.

"Come on, Stiff," he says. "Let someone else stand there and take it."

I glare at him. "Shut up, _Four,_" I spit, and he glares back at me.

The third knife leaves his fingers and a moment later the thud as it hits the target is upon me. I feel a sting in my ear and the tickle of liquid. He nicked my ear. And by the look on his face, he meant to.

"That's enough fun for one day," Eric smirks. He stalks out of the training room and slowly everyone follows. Uriah is the last to go, reaching out to squeeze my shoulder as he passes me and finally leaving Tobias and me alone, still staring at one another.

Finally Tobias goes to a cabinet and comes back with a clean white square of folded gauze. He hands it to me and I hold it to my ear. I'm angry at him for intentionally cutting me, but I pause seeing the look on his face and the anger in his eyes.

"What the _hell_ were you thinking, Beatrice?!" he explodes, making me jump.

I scowl. "I was _thinking_ that what he was doing to Al was not right! He's my friend!"

His hands go to his hair, pulling at the roots in frustration. "I've told you to be careful around Eric, I've told you not to draw so much attention to yourself! I thought we were clear on that before you even came here! How do you think I felt having to put you in danger like that?!"

"Tobias, I…" I begin, my own anger forgotten, but I don't know what to say.

"You're reckless," he spits. "And it scares me, Tris! We have too much to lose!"

I reach for him but he flinches away. I let my arm drop and we just stare at one another.

"You're right," I whisper. "I'm sorry."

Tobias just nods before he turns and walks out the door, tossing the knife from his hand onto a table on the way out. It skids across the table and clatters to the floor.

I slide down the wall and sit against it on the floor, my arm curled around my legs. My head drops to rest against my knees in defeat. With my eyes squeezed shut I take deep, slow breaths. I feel like crying, and I'm all alone in here, maybe I should. Maybe the release would help.

At the sound of the door opening I am glad to have held back the tears. I expect to see Uriah or Tobias when I look up, but to my surprise, it's Christina that I see walking toward me. I push myself up to stand.

"That was incredibly stupid," Christina says bluntly. I nod. Going by the unsympathetic expression on her face, I don't think she is here to comfort me.

"Did you come here just to insult me?" I ask, remembering the angry attitude she has had toward me the past few days. She shrugs. I sigh. "Look, Christina, I don't know what I did to upset you, but I know you must be dying to get it out. You've been glaring at me for days now." Having grown up in Candor, I know that Christina is accustomed to saying whatever is on her mind. That is what has made her behavior even more puzzling.

"Fine, I will." Christina shoots me a look of disgust and shakes her head. "I'm pissed that you wouldn't tell me the truth about the twins' father! I asked if you followed him here and you made it sound like he was in some other faction!"

I furrow my eyebrows as I think back to remember what I said to her on one of our first days in Dauntless. I was very careful not to outright lie to her. "I didn't say he went somewhere else, Chris. I said that I had always intended to come to Dauntless, that I came here for _me._ That's the truth! What even brought this up?!"

Christina huffs. "I know who it is," she hisses. My stomach drops.

"What?" I can barely whisper. "H-how?"

"I overheard Uriah and Marlene talking a few days ago. I don't even know how I didn't see it – Marlene is right, Landon _does_ look just like Four," she explains. I swallow hard. Uriah will definitely get an earful when I'm done here, he didn't say a word to me about this! "I couldn't hear Uriah's answer, he was too quiet. But that fight you and Four just had? That definitely confirmed it."

"Eavesdrop much?" I accuse, glaring at her and crossing my arms over my chest defensively. Christina scoffs. "Look, Chris, I couldn't tell you. The leaders told Four that we needed to keep it quiet."

"But I'm your friend!" Christina explodes. "You seriously don't trust me?!" I look down, and Christina shakes her head. "Or maybe you didn't want anyone to know that you're sleeping your way to the top and his favoritism is getting you through initiation. He probably trained you before you got here, too!"

My head shoots up and my hands ball into fists. I can't believe she just accused me of that! That's exactly why I didn't want anyone to know! Now I'm just pissed, and as I look at her, I remember all the comments she has made about Tobias, and the way I've seen her trying to flirt with him, and it all adds fuel to the flame. "You don't know what the hell you're talking about, Christina! That isn't even what this _really_ about anyway, is it?! You're _jealous._"

"Jealous of the special treatment you get? You bet I am!"

I laugh humorlessly. "No, because I don't. Four doesn't even have any say in my rankings, that's why Eric is around all the time. You're jealous that Four wants _me._ I've seen you try and flirt with him. You accuse me of 'sleeping my way to the top', but I'm not blind, that's precisely what _you_ have tried to do." Christina gasps at my words, but I just keep going. "But Four is _mine_. So _back off_!"

I storm out of the training room red with anger, not bothering to look back.


	18. Chapter 18

**ABNEGATION HELLIONS**

**CHAPTER 18**

**Tobias POV**

I glance at the list I have scrawled on the scrap of paper in my hand. This is the last time I'll have to watch this group of initiates fight; it's the last day of stage one. I keep going back and forth between being relieved that the anxiety that comes with watching Tris fight will end after today, and dreading what comes next: tomorrow is Visiting Day.

As I pick up the chalk, I try to push my anxiety about Visiting Day away and distract myself instead by trying to predict the outcome of these final fights. The initiates have been here for a month now, fighting every few days with target practice, conditioning days, and the occasional field trip in between.

_Will vs. Myra_

I snort and roll my eyes. Myra is the worst initiate in the bunch; it's clear that she only came to Dauntless to follow her boyfriend, Edward. Will is not one of the best, but he fights well enough. He has won half his fights so far, though he has never gone up against Edward or Peter. But Tris, Uriah, and Al have all beaten him without too much trouble. Regardless, Will won't have any difficulty with a timid little thing like Myra. The fight will be downright boring. But Will isn't cruel; he will get it over with quickly.

_Edward vs. Al_

Edward is among the best; I expect him to rank high. Uriah is the only one who has beaten him so far, and Edward left him with a limp for a couple of days. Al, on the other hand, has been a bit of a wild card. He won his first three fights, against Will the first day, then Peter and Molly after that. But he has lost to opponents that Peter and Will have beaten. He is big and powerful but often seems to just give up. Having lost his last three fights and with how good Edward is, Al won't win. I feel a bit of satisfaction at the thought; I have noticed the way he looks at Tris. It will be a relief when initiation is over and I can make it clear to everyone that she is mine.

_Drew vs. Uriah_

Obviously Uriah will win. He is undefeated so far, while Drew has won half his fights: Myra barely counts, Al didn't seem to be trying when he lost to Drew, and Tris was too injured to get a single solid punch in.

_Molly vs. Peter_

I smirk in satisfaction as I write Molly's name. She beat Myra, of course, but she's never gone up against Christina or Drew, the two others she might be able to beat, so that has remained her sole win. It's not entirely fair, but given what she has done to Tris, I don't give a shit; she should have been factionless after the train incident anyway. She came into initiation cocky, thinking that her sturdy build and height would be enough, but she is slow and stupid.

Peter, on the other hand, lost his first three fights against Uriah, Al, and Edward, but has been on a winning streak since, and his attitude reflects that. I have successfully managed to avoid putting him in the ring with Tris. But Peter is both quick and powerful, and will likely win again today.

_Tris vs. Christina_

Tris. She is hands down the better fighter, though she may be unhappy with the pairing. Tris and Christina seemed to become good friends instantly when they arrived at Dauntless, and I remember from my own initiation how awful I felt when I had to fight against Zeke. But the only others she hadn't fought were Peter and Uriah. Other than the disastrous fight with Drew after her fall from the train, Tris has only lost to Edward, while Christina has only beaten Myra and Drew. There is always the chance that Tris's selfless side and loyalty will overshadow her drive to win. I'm certain that Tris will hold back, I just hope she doesn't hold back _too_ much; while the second and third stages are weighted more heavily than the first, stage one results are typically a good predictor of the final rankings.

I set down the chalk and run my hand over my face, still thinking of Tris. Since our argument, after I was forced to throw knives at her, we have seen each other here and there outside of training. She has updated me on Adeline's change in diet ― still cranky as ever ― and arranged a time for Zeke and me to watch the babies for her last night.

But we haven't really _talked_.

At first, I was just so angry with her. Throwing those knives at her was like a nightmare; if my aim were too far off, my worst fear, the fear of losing her, could become a reality and it would be all my fault.

After the incident, I tried again to meet with Max. It took a while, but I finally managed to see him. Unfortunately, he simply reminded me that if I wanted a say in how initiation (or anything else in our faction, for that matter) was run...I should have taken the leadership job which I have been offered many times. I couldn't admit to him what a coward I am, that one of the main reasons I continued to turn it down was that I was afraid of seeing my father. I also haven't been happy with the direction Leadership is taking Dauntless in, but I know he's right. If I want to change it, that's the opportunity to do so. I just don't know if I can be brave enough. And that cowardice has put Tris at further risk.

_At least this is the last day of stage one,_ I think as the initiates begin to trickle in, beginning with Edward and Myra. It's a relief to know that after today, I won't have to watch Tris be hurt in the ring, won't have Eric hanging over my shoulder ordering me to put her physical safety at risk.

Tomorrow will be visiting day. I won't be able to avoid the Pit this year as I must keep an eye on the initiates. I can only hope that Marcus will not try to see me again this year.

Then stage two will begin. That thought puts a whole new fear in my head. Beatrice hasn't shared her aptitude test results with me, neither of us has even brought it up. But if she's what I think she may be... then she is at far more risk in the simulation stage than she was with the fights. The kind of risk that got Amar killed.

That's what makes it worth being required in the Pit tomorrow and risking an encounter with the monster that raised me. I have to be in that simulation room to protect her.

Before I can worry about that, we have to get through today. The initiates continue to trickle in, and I see Uriah enter with Will and Christina, Eric following behind them. I feel uneasy realizing that the only two missing now are Tris and Al. They finally enter together as the other initiates are quieting down, and Tris breaks away from Al and hurries to sit by Uriah. Al follows her movements with a pair of puppy dog eyes that make my blood boil.

"Will and Myra, in the ring," Eric bellows out without giving the initiates a chance to even warm up. He doesn't care if they get hurt worse than they need to. In fact, I think he enjoys it.

* * *

The fights go just as I had predicted: Will beats Myra in minutes, Al went down and didn't get up early into his fight with Edward. Uriah wiped the floor with Drew so badly that I wonder if Drew will even be released from the infirmary to see his parents tomorrow, if they come to Visiting Day.

Peter and Molly have just finished their fight. The pair are friends, but Peter was ruthless and showed no restraint at all. It seems the bonds of friendship don't go far with him. He smirks in satisfaction watching Edward drag an unconscious Molly out the door to take her to the infirmary.

But now I have to watch the fight I have been anxious for all day: Christina and Tris. I give Tris a sad smile as she makes her way to the ring, but she doesn't look apprehensive. You'd think that she didn't give a damn what happened to her opponent in this fight. Even though I have noticed some tension between the two girls in the past few days, it puzzles me.

The two girls step into the ring and each takes a defensive stance. "Begin!" I call out.

Christina wastes no time in making the first move, but Tris dodges Christina's kick easily. She circles for a moment, fakes a jab at Christina's stomach and Christina falls for it. While her hands have moved to needlessly protect her midsection, Tris throws a hard punch at Christina's jaw.

Christina growls in anger and frustration and I watch with my jaw dropped as the pair ruthlessly trades blows. Christina is showing more determination and endurance than I have ever seen from her before even though Tris is clearly winning, and the two even pull hair and scratch each other.

Christina is losing steam and her next kick is sloppy. Tris catches her foot and Christina hits the ground hard. I stand frozen in shock as I watch Tris ― though fierce, she is usually so kind ― kick her friend's stomach and head as Christina curls into a ball. "Stop!" I finally yell. "Enough!" Christina isn't unconscious but her eyes are glassy and unfocused, I'm almost certain she has a moderate concussion. Tris bends down and says something in Christina's ear too quietly for me to hear before calmly walking out of the ring.

"That's enough for today," I mutter, it's a wonder the initiates even hear me. "Will, take her to the infirmary."

Tris just nods once and stalks out of the training room leaving most of us starring after her, still stunned.


	19. Not an update, sorry!

Hello, wonderful readers!

I have debated on this for a while now, and have finally decided that this is what I need to do. Most of us are dealing with a range of stressful situations right now and I am no exception. Even under better circumstances, I struggle with depression and anxiety. Writing is a hobby and meant to be fun and even at times a sort of therapy for me, but I am putting way too much pressure on myself and adding to my anxiety instead of reducing it.

So, I am taking a break from writing. I expect my stories to be on hiatus for probably 3-6 months. Please don't badger me for updates; I wouldn't be doing this if I didn't feel it was necessary.

I promise you that I have every intention of coming back and finishing these stories, and writing many more. It isn't a case of not knowing what to write, or not having ideas. I have them both outlined in moderate detail, as well as some pretty well thought out ideas for future stories. I still love these characters, I still want to give them the endings they deserve, and I still am committed to completing these for my readers (and myself.) I just need some time to clear my head so the words can start flowing again.

I hope you are all staying safe and well through the health crisis and (at least for those of us in the U.S.) the unrest that is occurring right now.

See you in a few months!

XOXO, Panda


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